I don't think He/Him are neopronouns as the prefix neo- means new. Surely His would be old (paleopronouns), or timeless (aeternuspronouns), rather than new
Relative to eternity, the invention of the english language is pretty new
In mormonism if you don't do their special ceremonies and have multiple wives, you lose your dick for eternity. I learned that in Sunday school when I was 12 lol.
Mormon theology also pretty much just cuts the Gordian knot proposed in this post by saying, "Fuck yeah he's got a dick. Uses it ALL THE TIME." I believe that a "perfected body" was the verbiage I was taught in Sunday School. Tritheistic heresy, Shmitheistic Shmeresy....
Begins pissing in a whirling dervish
Kid: “Then I won’t do the ceremony because I never wanted a dick in the first place.”
Mormons: “No! That’s not how you play the game!”
You should know how much time Christian monks spent reasoning about the foreskin of Christ.
It's a lot.
Long enough to postulate that once the Jesus ascended, his foreskin ascended as well and become. The. Rings. Of. Saturn.
Sky will never be the same, won't it?
The weird thing is that a lot of christians (including the Catholic church) affirm that God "the Father" has actually no gender.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_of_God_in_Christianity
Does Jesus have a gender tho? As stated above, Jesus has a fully human body and nature (or else you are deemed a heretic by the council of Chalcedon). He is described as a man and several churches and rulers have historically claimed to hold a piece of his foreskin, so he must've had a penis. Therefore:
Technically, you can't say that He/Him are God's preferred pronouns because the capitalization doesn't appear in the oldest texts. They are more a matter of tradition than of reality. However, you could say that's even worse because Christians have embraced these neopronouns on God's behalf.
What if He came out as trans in the 19th century and influenced the scholars to change His pronouns through dreams?
Oh there's plenty of Christian nationalist men thinking about "divine dick"
Considering how consistently the world gets fucked, yeah, I'd say there's a divine Dick out there doing all the fucking.
That's it, I'm using He/Him pronouns now.
And I bet when You do this, You'll expect us all to use the pronouns that You want us to-
Fuck.
I wouldn't call them neopronouns, they're more like archeopronouns.
God never addressed themselves as him/her. They referred to themselves as I am.
There are definitely He pronouns in the bible
There are several other gods and goddesses named in the old testament, so I'm willing to buy that the Christian god has a dick, and it's for inserting into goddesses. And given the personality on display by said diety, I'd wager said dick could pass through the eye of a needle and still have room for the camel.
I would love to see the prompt that generated this ChatGPT response.
The whole capitalization of pronouns thing was pretty much entirely made up around the 19th century anyway (as well as the capitalizing the word "Lord", which the King James version invented outright), so you can argue that protestant churches are following a woke plot to change the pronouns of the christian god as well.
I mean it was up in the sky about a month ago. The last time it was visible was apparently in ancient Egypt. If you missed it, to bad. The news said it wouldn't be visible again until he gets a prostate exam in over a thousand years
If you ask about gender in death, people will just look at you weird.
There's compounding evidence that a lot of religious canon was simply written by mankind as a kind of societal control.
The living should be kinder to one another.
💙
Now I’m wondering if God has a belly button….cause that would imply an umbilical cord
Nah, that would be silly.
God is more like a platypus. No nipples or bellybutton (but could surely produce milk if they felt like it), venomous, and hatched from an egg.
According to Mormons, god is literally male, with (perfect) male genitalia. There is also a god--the-mother, who is female, and is both secret and sacred (they really don't like talking about her), and also utterly subservient to god the father, because of course she is. According to Mormon theology, both gods were once mortal, and were raised up to godhood by their godly parents; Mormons--if they're good enough--can go to Mormon super-heaven, where they will also become gods in their own right. Before everyone was born physically, they were born spiritually, in... More or less the same way babies are born now, except in heaven, to a heavenly mom. And there were hundreds of billions of spirit babies, so I guess that god the dad and god the mom really like sex or something? The implications start getting really, really weird, very fast. Which is part of the reason why Mormons don't usually want to talk about stuff like this with people that aren't Mormon.
I believe that the quote is, "As man is, so once was god. As god is, so man can become," or something like that.
Source: was Mormon for >25 years.
Congrats for getting out I guess?
To paraphrase Nietzsche, that which doesn't kill you psychologically scars you and leaves you with a lifetime of therapy bills.
This is excellent:
If God has no cock, then being male doesn't need a cock to be real.
If he has a cock, then does he only use it to pee? Or does he use it to both pee and fuck? Does that mean he had sexual relations with a minor who was also married already?
Does the Trinity have a cock? Or is it only the father or is it only the son? You can clearly see that the son had a cock. But did he keep it as a ghost cock? Do they have 3 different cocks? Or do they share a cock?
Since they supposedly are virgin, do they have to jack off? Do they jack off at the same time? Or does one have to hide somewhere to jack off? Or are they okay just jacking off in front of the others?
What do they pee? If you take a shower in god pee, do you smell good? Or bad?
And why all these questions about pee anyway...how about poo? Is God poo good or bad? If it's bad, doesn't that mean that God has bad things inside of him? Does that mean they gotta eat something? What do they eat? Can we eat it too? How come God let's people die of hunger if he has a source of God food?
God created both men and women in his image, so he must have biological gender traits from both.
You see, god stoked his divine dick and then, there came a big bang and billions of galaxy came out of the ejaculated foam.
I can follow this, up to
they are neopronouns
I believe that that's a decision made by translators of the bible. Hebrew doesn't have lowercase letters, and the Greek versions of the New Testament that I found don't capitalize as much. And are they distinct?
I would assume since gods are omnipotent, their dicks are always the perfect size for the situation. Or perhaps they are inconceivably huge. Since they seem to like swinging them around so much.
Pronouns? God don't need no stinking pronouns. God got dick.
Well the church is Christ's bride so we can only assume it's going to get dicked down.
Want to know why life is always fucking you? If God has a dick, his dick would be omnipresent therefore you're constantly being dicked by God.
Couple of fun facts about this :
so God themself while referred to in English as a he refers to themselves as ' I am ' technically I think we should be using they them pronouns but English was traditionally a gendered language.
Jesus on the other hand 100% had a dick. Whether he kept that or not, post ascension that's up for interpretation but Jesus was 100% biologically male.
Yes, and the church went nuts displaying the "Holy Relic" that was his supposed foreskin for many, many years, in many churches... At the same time. It got so out of control that people started to wonder why the church was so obsessed with Jesus's dick. So the Pope finally got a clue, commanded a stop to the practice, and threatened to excommunicate anyone who spoke about it afterward. Ah, Christianity. Good times.
In the late 17th century the Vatican librarian Leo Allatius wrote a treatise entitled De Praeputio Domini Nostri Jesu Christi Diatriba (A Discussion of the Foreskin of Our Lord Jesus Christ), claiming that the Holy Prepuce ascended, like Jesus himself, and was transformed into the rings of Saturn.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Prepuce
The article also contains this gem:
Most of the Holy Prepuces were lost or destroyed during the Reformation and the French Revolution.
Jesus on the other hand 100% had a dick. [...] Jesus was 100% biologically male.
Oh did they find his body?
Wouldn't it be more reasonable to conclude that the probability of Jesus being biologically male equals the human average of males being biologically male? Ie 99.5%.
Couldn't his radical compassion for outcasts and the downtrodden be related to personal struggles growing up with gender dysphoria?
If you believe he was conceived in a virgin, wouldn't it be MORE likely that he had XX chromosomes?
He is circumcised according to Luke gospel, so the dick biblically accurate.
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