No Stupid Questions

I’m good. Trying to figure out which remote part of the world I’d like to visit, maybe stay there.

I had to put my cat down first thing this morning. I've come to terms with it but am distracting myself from the need to go home and clean up his things.

I finally quit drinking in 2025 and I’m doing it for the long run (thanks to the simple method from Allen Carr).

I’ll quit smoking in February as well.

So I feel very good.

Except that I just read that post https://lemmy.zip/post/30949122 about AI and now I feel beaten and angry.

I have had one of the worst days that I can recall since I left my ex-husband. Woke up early to go to the dentist, they had to numb me which is the worst part IMO. I go home and my mother texts me she’s been in the hospital over 24 hours. I rush to get ready for work and go see her. On my way I hit a crow, it ruins the grill on my VW bug. I get to the hospital and sit with my mom until I have to leave for work. I order a fish sandwich to grab for my dinner and only after getting to my desk at work open my takeout and find they gave me a fried shrimp sandwich instead. My mom lets me know the hospital released her saying they didn’t know what was wrong and prescribed a muscle relaxer. I am a supervisor at work, I had one person call out sick, I’m behind on my duties, and I had a new person start today. Not to mention i started my period last night and was cramping several hours today. the cherry on top was getting the email from credit karma that my score had changed, found it had gone down 30 points because my ex-husband skipped the car payment last month and is now behind 30 days. 🥲 I’m pleading, what have I done to deserve all of this? I hope tomorrow is better, and I hope even more that my mothers health improves.

I'm angy and my back hurts.

Not well. I’m really worried about how the US is sliding down into fascist bullshit.

Stressed as all hell. My job depends on the things Trump is currently trying to block. If that goes, I dunno how to pay the mortgage.

So I'm exhausted, haven't slept well in a week. Otherwise okay. I've got my family and my pets. Friends to play games with.

Pretty down I realized today the reason Star Trek being made today is not aspirational like old trek was. At first I thought it was bad writers not getting star trek but now I understand, the writers can't write aspirational when they don't see a future deep in their heart.

Becase deep down we all know we can never make it to that world with peace and a bright future. We will hate and kill each other till the climate wipes us all out and the only life in the solar system is microbes on Mars.

Burying myself in my work so I don't burst into tears every other moment. Grieving the sudden loss of a cat that was my universe for her whole fuzzy diabolical life. It's been a month, but I knew the second I plucked her from the bushes that she was going to destroy me. We had a good eleven years but fuck, man.
My gf and our surviving cat have been great consolation, but violet had no sense of personal space and I find this void in my orbit to be currently...unbearable.

My lease ends today and I've had two apartments reject my application. So I'm going to be sleeping in my car with my cats tonight. It's all pretty surreal. It really can happen to anyone.

I mean I'm okay for now. The world is burning but none is affecting me yet (that doesn't make it okay, I'm just trying be real about my situation) and I semi-recently landed a new job where people seem to appreciate me. It looks like we are weirdly very well positioned to weather the current storms and I got an email from management essentially saying "I don't care who's in charge, we are still a woke company". Family is good. We have food, housing, and our health for now. It could be a lot worse. I'm sorry to anyone going through tough times. I wish I could fix it for you.

Edit: I gotta amend this a bit just to vent. I do increasingly feel isolated and alone. I have my immediate family (wife and kids) which is great. I highly recommended it if you can find someone. However, my wife is mostly apolitical and just tries not to think about things like that. I'm sure that reads bad but I'm sympathetic. She didn't ask for any of this and is just trying to live her life. We're also not into a lot of the same things. That actually would be nice if I had other people to share my interests with. Its nice sometimes to have things that are your own in a relationship. I've lost nearly everyone else to maga and culture war BS. I catch myself doing that thing that elderly people do where they talk too long to customer service people (not about politics, just small talk). I have no community and I don't know how to find that

Terrible. I'm about to head to the piece of concrete I sleep on at night. Gotta somehow make food and mysteriously appear tomorrow.

I recently made a decision to transfer colleges in order to save my mental health. This meant I’d have to take on a few student loans, but with FAFSA it still felt manageable, and it has significantly improved my life.

However, If financial assistance from the government drops, the chances I will be able to afford school long enough to graduate drop significantly too.

I’m not super jazzed about that; though, I still think the transfer was worth it.

Oh yeah, also, I just recently got medicated for ADHD and it’s what’s let me start to pull my life together, but adderall might get banned so… rip me.

Maybe I’ll take up smoking lol. I mean that as a joke, but what a world when clinically safe, prescribed meds might get banned but literal cancer causing, heavy metal filled, habit forming drugs are going to be legal forever…

Cheers mates, couldn’t have asked for a better seat to watch the final fall of America and possibly the rest of the world. Good luck to all of you who’ll last longer than me.

My anxiety almost acted up again today and my afternoon was kind of sucky during that. But, I got it under control after an hour so I just went back to normal disassociation. Not happy, sad, or anything. Just...nothing. How are you?

Today was a bastard. Helped a bunch of people but now I’m mentally exhausted. Family has been great and I’ve got a cat sleeping on me. Couldn’t have ended better.

Not good

Scared in an existential sense but materially I am doing ok. Recently changed my major to history because I enjoy it more than I enjoyed physics and it has made my studies into something I actively want to engage in. It's nice. I will be fleeing this country but that won't end the dread as unfortunately America affects everyone.

I am great, it is the lunar new year and I am celebrating it with my family.

I made vegan fried rice for them. Most asian haven't had vegan fried rice, because typically fried rice involves lard and egg. However, they loved the vegan fried rice so much that my cousin asked my aunt to recreate it tonight.

I'm okay, thank you for asking. Work was a little frustrating, but it will pass. My GF's life turned a corner, which makes me happy. And I saw Sonic. I'm not great, but today was a 'nice' day.

I'm full, have eaten soup and dumplings at my parents in law place and yesterday also so much tasty food.

Very stressed, too much on my plate, exhausted.

Thanks for asking.

How are you?

Not fucking great.

Nearing a psychotic amount of rage directed at the elites whose sole desire is to grind the rest of use beneath their feet.

Rip and tear, brothers.

Upvoted for asking.

Meh.

Past two weeks have been such a roller coaster that I don't even know. Thankfully I have therapy in the morning so I hope I can get the help I need to get this sorted. Things seem to be happening back to back to back that it feels, at times, that I don't get a chance to breathe.

Under a ton of stress. My job has been cut from budgets so I'm scrambling to find a job before I'm on unemployment. Currently like 60% of a months expenses behind on credit card. Chin JUST above water. Probably will have to pull from my meager savings once or twice to stay afloat. Dealing with some health stuff. Dealing with a shitty employer. Likely means I'll need to move if I can't figure it out quickly.

Wrapped up in all my own shit, feeling like a distant boyfriend, son, brother, friend, etc.

Making me fall behind on regular shit like doing dishes/taking out trash/doing laundry. I mean it gets done but not until it's basically overflowing. I've got no bandwidth for it. Living space feeling cluttered guides my free time to being the same shit -- scrolling on my phone, escaping to my couch.

Id love another pandemic tbh.

Ready for the general strike followed by the mass executions of the oligarch class.

Usually takes a couple years for the general public to catch up to where I'm at so biding my time.

I hate not having money..

The bad thoughts have been successfully buried for now

I had a hackday at work where I experimented a bit with python (I haven't worked in it professionally before)... I translated a package I maintain into it and I really loathe a lot of the language's design decisions. It's still fun to experiment though so I had fun. On the other hand I'm planning to fly into the US next week and I've been semi-nervous as a skirt wearing non-conforming man... but now I'm legitimately uncertain if shit like the TSA, CBP and air travel will work with the "Hey, anyone want to resign" memo. If it wasn't for an important family event I'd absolutely cancel my shit.

(Champagne problems warning) Was goddamn great until I pulled a calf muscle playing soccer tonight and now probably can't ski on Friday and Monday, despite our mountains FINALLY getting a nice dump.

Admittedly, my problems are nothing compared to the children who mined the cobalt for my phone but godfuckingdamnit.

Thanks for asking how are you?

Pissed I found out I lost 700 in crypto 🤦 and it was my fault

okayish. didn't get enough sleep, because i poured me a big soft drink yesterday evening and decided to watch shows until i drank it all up, even though i slowly exceeded waaaayy past bedtime. i regret nothing!

Im on meds and i dont feel much emotion. Its a relief but i have no drive to do anything. I gotta go to the gym but it just dont happen. Its like a hazy dream.

Tired already. Four more years of this shit