this post was submitted on 10 Mar 2025
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Every drop of water, crack, ant, royally freaks me out at this point. I can't afford to rent. I own a shitty house that is a fixer upper. So frustrating.

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[–] CmdrShepard42@lemm.ee 95 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Not really much advice other than being proactive about issues, but it is funny how concerned you quickly become with all types of water once you own a home. Rain intrusion, drainage in the yard, leaky pipes, dripping noises, frozen pipes, gutters, humidity, water heater, storms, etc, etc. It's a real menace and so are squirrels (as I also found out after purchasing a home).

[–] youngalfred@lemm.ee 36 points 1 week ago (2 children)

This right here. Every running water noise your ears perk up thinking that it's the worst. Then you realise it's just the dishwasher.

[–] myersguy@lemmy.simpl.website 30 points 1 week ago

Did you hear that? I feel like the toilet flushed funny

[–] baldingpudenda@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I just fixed the dishwasher that is original to the house. I've never used a dishwasher before(ty technology connections). my god is it loud and keeps giving me a heat attack even a week after using it, but I can't argue with clean dishes.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

You certainly can argue with them. It's only a problem if they start to argue back.

[–] paequ2@lemmy.today 18 points 1 week ago

how concerned you quickly become with all types of water

LOL, yes! 99% of my problems these last 5 years have been related to water. It's really made me want to learn more about plumbing.

[–] DistressedDad@lemmy.ca 10 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I pulled the hydrometer out of my cigar humidor to became more aware of the dampness of my basement. I also spent over $1,000 on evicting a family of raccoons out from under my backyard deck. So yeah, I get it HAH

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[–] ArgentRaven@lemmy.world 39 points 1 week ago (3 children)

I learned to fix it. Before YouTube, that usually means not so great. But now, I usually do at least as good as a job as the people I'd hire.

Fixing stuff is easy, and you have to accept that there's no perfect fix.

Ants, set out ant bait traps. Look outside and see if there's a trail, follow it to the source, and spray it with ant poison.

Cracks, YouTube that. They may be nothing.

Leaks, if it's plumbing, you can buy pipes at home Depot and replace them.

Granted, it will take a while. Maybe all day. But you'll get an endorphin rush when it's done and eventually you'll come to know all the ins and outs of your house.

But it's you look at it and it's too big, Google a company to do it. Even if you're halfway, and find you're stuck. No shame in getting help. This shines you don't have a family member or friend who's already handy.

But really, if you can't fix it, can't afford to have it fixed, just do what you can to keep the house clean and work on it a little bit or put aside money till you can. That's hard, but that's owning a house. Like anything in life, it's difficult. But it doesn't have to stay that way, with enough time and practice.

You're already smarter than many, asking for other's opinions. Don't suffer in silence. I believe in you!

[–] droplet6585@lemmy.ml 18 points 1 week ago (2 children)

no perfect fix

And if you need convincing, go measure some parts of your house. Peak around in places and see how its actually assembled compared to how you thought it would be. Then realize it hasn't fallen over yet, so maybe perfection doesn't matter.

[–] baronvonj@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

We all want to believe that these rooms actually follow geometry with things like parallel/perpendicular walls.

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[–] hex123456@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 week ago

And if you are not 100% confident, take lots of pics as you go. And every step, do something that you figure you can undo. Worse case scenario, it goes back to how it was…

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[–] PerogiBoi@lemmy.ca 34 points 1 week ago

So many people who are mentally and cognitively bankrupt own houses. They never do any maintenance on them, or if they do, they never do it right. And yet, their houses aren’t (always) falling apart.

Houses are more sturdy than our anxieties convince us. Fix things little by little as they come, prioritize what comes first. Your house won’t fall apart or blow up. This is what I tell my wife when she gets nervous about something creaking.

[–] 2loudis2old@lemmy.ca 27 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

NEVER start a plumbing project when the hardware or big box stores are closed.

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[–] gazter@aussie.zone 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Know when to bodge a fix, and when to nut up and spend some time and money on something. Damp mouldy patch on the ceiling? Have a look in the ceiling space, see if you can spot the issue, fix it if it's easy. Slap some mould killer on it, done, don't worry about it. If it comes back? Get it fixed.

Writing shit down helps. I've got a whole todo list of things that need to be fixed. It's shitty how long it is, but because it's written down it's already half taken care of and I don't have that random stress of 'oh good that's right there's a leaky shower' and having to remember to do that thing.

List the issues, google one by one how to bodge it, decide if it's worth it.

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[–] plz1@lemmy.world 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Try to only tackle one project at a time. It gets exponentially more stressful trying to juggle a bunch of incomplete projects. Also, you'll never be "done". That's not the point. The point is shelter and comfort.

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[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 25 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

I remember going from being super excited that I owned the walls and fixtures around me to then realising I owned the walls and fixtures and no-one else was going to fix them. Not everything needs doing now though, so separate the issues into things you can live with, mid-term renovations and now things.

Oh, and always remember you’re not paying off someone else’s mortgage anymore!

[–] Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone 10 points 1 week ago

That's how i deal with it.

It's not causing more damage, it can wait.

It's not someone else who's benefiting from my hard earned money

[–] andrewth09@lemmy.world 22 points 1 week ago (5 children)

I know it is cheesy, but look at every maintenance project as an opportunity for learning a new DIY skill.

Start going to garage sales and flea markets to collect tools.

It helps if you can chitchat with someone IRL about mutual homeowner issues.

Homeownership is man's continuous battle against water.

[–] evasive_chimpanzee@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

Homeownership is man's continuous battle against water.

Yeah, a heck of a lot of household troubles can be put on the backburner, but anything involving water intrusion needs to be fixed right away.

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[–] CurlyWurlies4All@slrpnk.net 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Paying more for good quality tools to fix things properly can seem like a luxury initially, but they're worth it when you're 10 years down the line and still able to use the same set as if they were brand new.

[–] Habahnow@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 week ago

Idk. I now recommend getting cheap tools first until they either break( from usage) or their bad quality is a noticeable and active hindrance. From there buy better quality. I also suggest buying ALL the tools you need. Sometimes, you think you can make it work with some alternatives and don't want to get the specialized tool. I feel that I usually end up spending more time dealing with the problem and getting more stressed out.

Example of the latter: dealing with my drum breaks with just pliers. Uninstalling was a breeze, but installing was a huge pain. The cheapest specialty tools made my life so much better, and used them several times. I notice their janky, but they still work good enough to get the job done.

[–] dumples@midwest.social 21 points 1 week ago

Remember this is a marathon and not a sprint. So think in long terms for fixing things. Even if you sell the house having something done correctly will increase the value. Fix something and maintain as best as possible to keep it working or as high value. This feels best if you do it room by room so you can enjoy the things you fixed.

[–] InvisibleRasta@lemmy.ml 20 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Don’t tell me… I’m 36 years old. Five years ago, I bought my house—an old one in a small town here in Spain that needed a complete renovation, including the roof. After four years of very, very hard work, mostly done by myself, I managed to restructure the house. I redid everything except the exterior walls. I moved in six months ago. So, here’s what happened: last month, some workers were installing new fiber optic cables for the whole street. They climbed onto my roof without asking and drilled a hole in it to run the cables—without my consent. For the past two weeks, I’ve been battling the fiber company and insurance to get this fixed. Meanwhile, I’ve had a bucket in one of my rooms for two weeks, and the room is now full of humidity and mold. The entire ceiling, which is made of drywall, needs to be completely redone. My hair is falling out nonstop—I’ll be bald like a light bulb in a couple of months if this keeps up.

[–] wilt@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago

It would be a real shame if that cable which is on your property suddenly wasn't.

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[–] CrimeDad@lemmy.crimedad.work 19 points 1 week ago (3 children)

It beats having a landlord.

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[–] renlok@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Learn/Improve your DIY skills, most things that need fixing around the house are actually pretty simple to do yourself

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[–] OhVenus_Baby@lemmy.ml 17 points 1 week ago (2 children)

The biggest advice I can give is put systems in place to reduce as much as possible the list of things you have to manage freeing up your mind and time to solve more complex issues.

Stick a hose on the dehumidifier route into the drain never empty it again as an example where as before you emptied it daily or every 2 days.

[–] nis@feddit.dk 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Good example.

In a similar vein: setup alarms. Smoke detectors is an easy one, but also water leakage detectors. If feeling adventurous, maybe logging of water/power usage as well to catch slow leaks.

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[–] Lennnny@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

It gets boring to worry. Now I just view it as a cosy box that I'll occasionally have to patch up. Also, getting comfortable with DIY, especially that first scary 'dive in' moment where you have to cut the wire, drill the wall, or pull up the board. Over time it all just gets as normal and run of the mill as cracking an egg for an omelette.

[–] Noel_Skum@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 week ago

Never, ever, under any circumstances, think that you’ve finally done everything that needs doing.

[–] BlueSquid0741 12 points 1 week ago

I can only say, learn how to fix things. Like, everything. Because everything is going to fail at some point, and that $4000 quote to fix it doesn’t look so good.

Rodents or possums in the ceiling, call the local pest expert for advice. They’ll usually give you that because they don’t want to come out and get in your roof stage themselves.

Snakes? Don’t go under the house in hot weather. Keep trimming the grass/weeds close the house especially if your kids play there.

Invasive root systems like white poplar near the house? Either have a professional kill and relive the tree, or did up the roots every time you see a shoot come up.

Generally look around the house. Think about how each thing could fail (gutters, roofing, stairs, electrical, plumbing, paint, windows). Think of worst case scenarios for those things and what you would do if that happened. Prepare for it whether that means having the number of someone who can do it, or how you can do some DIY repairs, even if it’s temporary.

Finally. Bush fire. Are you prepared? Do you have a plan? Do you have timeframes for doing your bush fire preparations every year? Talk to neighbours and find out their plan and see if something similar works for you. You can stay at home and fight fires, but the mental toll of doing that can be crippling and possibly never recover. My plan is for the family to leave immediately, and I gather all our important stuff and follow as soon as possible.

[–] taiyang@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago

Oh, the stress? I remind myself that renters in my area are now paying twice what my mortgage is, and I bought just three years ago. It's a quick boost, and believe me, I've got at least a dozen fixes myself to do that I don't have the energy or money for.

If that's not enough, take a few weekends to at least hit what you can. Make a list and tackle things slowly as to not get overwhelmed. One by one, step by step.

For example, I used a week break to paint the kids room and it feels like a brand new home, even patching cracks and dealing with water damaged ceiling drywall (was minor, and the roofing was already fixed before I moved in). The rest of the house needs it, but it still made me feel like I did something.

[–] Azal@pawb.social 11 points 1 week ago

When you hear a loud noise just think to yourself "Please be haunted and not something expensive..." it's what I do.

[–] expatriado@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

i see repairing my house as a money saving hobby, got lots of plumbing, drywall, lumber, electrical, network, and car repair tools in the shed, garage and laundry room. i prefer to watch a diy vid on yt than any fiction, i guess my frugality drive me

[–] LaunchesKayaks@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago (4 children)

I don't have a fixer-upper per se, but the dude who flipped my place to sell it really cut corners. I do as many repairs myself as I can. I consult the Internet, local hardware shops, and people I know who have done home repairs. I'm currently dealing with a toilet that won't stop running unless I cut the water supply to it. I know that I need to replace all the parts in the tank, but I haven't been able to make it to the hardware store to get the parts.

Also redneck engineering temporary fixes is totally a valid strategy. My parents put flex seal on a fucked up part of their roof and it kept the leaks at bay for 4 years. It could have lasted longer, but they got the whole thing replaced.

My screen door is broken, and I haven't been able to replace it, so I have it tied open and held in place against my porch railing with some yarn. In bad storms, before it broke really bad, I used duck tape to keep it shut so it wouldn't go flapping around.

Parts of my porch siding (plastic lattice) would also start blowing around in bad storms, so I used spare boards to prop everything in place until I was able to cut all the lattice down.

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[–] ShellMonkey@lemmy.socdojo.com 9 points 1 week ago

Bought cheap and underestimated the effort needed to make it your ideal. At least that's my experience. It can get overwhelming at times but I find a certain peace I'm taking it as the demon you know. I get a lot of bugs in the spring when the weather starts to warm and it's damn annoying, but know that when the weather gets more stable they'll leave and I can get back to normal. It's sort of a zen thing to recognize that it's almost 100 years old, so yeah, there are going to be some annoyances, can't call it unexpected.

Basically just make it your own, and do what you can when you can. Unless you're rich and have all the resources/time in the world there's no point in getting in a panic that it can't all be done at once.

[–] TheOSINTguy@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 week ago

I don't see enough people mentioning this, but preventative maintenance can save you a lot of money.

Another thing I would recommend is to be familiar with the systems in your house, what fuel does your furnace use? What type of water heater do you have? how old are the fuses in the fuse box? Does your electrical panel have a surge protector? Do you have a water pump should your basement begin to flood? Do you have a generator panel? Knowing how these work can save you money on trouble shooting.

For example, if you live in an area with lots of squirrels, it might be worth putting up chicken wire on any entrance to the attic from the outdoors. Ex: air vents. If I would have done this, I would have saved $900 from chewed wires that could have started a fire.

[–] TORFdot0@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

You get used to being house poor. You learn how to budget how much it really costs you to live.

It beats paying someone else’s bills. That’s for sure

When you think things are bleak as far as repairs/maintenance, look to local lenders in your community. Unless you made a significant down payment they probably sold your mortgage to Freddie but they still can give you loans on your home equity especially if going to pay for things that are going to put more equity in your home.

[–] PrettyFlyForAFatGuy@feddit.uk 8 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Learn to fix these things.

I get ants turn up maybe once a year during summer. putting some ant killer powder down when they show up usually sorts them out.

DIY isn't too hard, plenty of vids on youtube about how to do more or less everything.

I did all the laminate flooring in the top floor of my sisters house using nothing but youtube, a dremmel and a mitre saw.

I probably should have invested in a laminate cutter in hindsight but i got it done

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[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 week ago

Drop of water depends on where the water is. Watch online videos to diagnose problems, it's the opposite of doing this for personal health. People have some crazy cheap ways to address issues.

Crack, draw a line parallel to the crack on each side. Measure it and it on the wall. Check back and see if the measurement is changing. Patch it if it's stable. If it's not stable, probably not good news, start with videos of what others have done.

Ants are the easiest. There are barrier sprays that will keep out any insects. Fall instructions on the product but typically just spray it on the outside of the foundation once a year.

Houses are over engineers to stay standing up so don't worry too much. The expensive stuff will come around ever couple decades like roof replacement so plan for that but most everything can be remediated with little effort, especially if you don't care how it looks. You said it's a fixer up, each patch is just another layer to its character.

[–] Churbleyimyam@lemm.ee 7 points 1 week ago

My advice is to spend more time out of the house! The more I stew in the epicentre of the entropy and problems the more overwhelmed I feel by them and the harder it is to tackle them. Getting out can help to get some perspective and make you appreciate what you do have.

[–] multifariace@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

Do a task everyday.

Making sure to keep working on a fixer-upper by doing something everyday will help reach the goal of maintaining rather than falling behind. Focus on things that can get worse faster. Leaks and shorts would be a top priority that should not wait. KNOW HOW TO TURN OFF MAIN WATER AND POWER. Make sure this can be done quickly.

[–] serenissi@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

Invest in basic tools and have good relations with local repair persons, try to learn from them too as they fix stuffs. Hands on expertise is more helpful than theoretical how to knowledge. Also invest time in designing fail safe insect and paste management and plumbing. Bit of initial work usually pays off later.

[–] fubarx@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 week ago
  • Practice triage: start with small, achievable projects that can be done on a weekend. Don't get overwhelmed. Be kind to yourself. Not every problem is immediate or needs fixing.

  • If you have access to a local tools library, avail yourself of it fully. The staff are a treasure-trove of wisdom and knowledge. If not, talk to the oldest, crotchiest person at your local bardware store.

  • There are so many single-use tools out there (favorite one is so you can unscrew the faucet bolt under a sink). If not, see if there's a community online board and post a request.

  • Vintage appliances, windows, doors, etc are cool. A little elbow grease and they're in good shape. Junkyards and recycling centers are a treasure trove.

  • If it involves anything hazardous or too heavy (gas, electricity, foundation), bite the bullet and seek professional help.

  • Ants and cracks are small-fry. Baits and fillers are easy fixes. Focus on big ticket items. And remember, some things are best left alone (see triage, above).

[–] SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Depends on the condition of the home. Make sure you get a good inspection before buying and understand the ramifications of anything they find if you go ahead with a purchase. Things that eventually need to be replaced, likely in the lifetime you'll own it, are the water heater, refrigerator (assuming it is cheaper than replacing the compressor), HVAC and roof. Not terrible but you have to budget for it. Since you say you live in a "fixer upper" I'd say just keep it so it doesn't leak. Don't worry about ants as long as you keep all of your food sealed up and they aren't carpenter ants. If they are then you need an exterminator.

You WILL find the occasional bug, odd noise, scheduled repairs and replacements, etc. These aren't causes for panic. I can do most basic repairs but I leave plumbing and bigger electrical jobs to pros because they require specific skills, familiarity with the issues and lots of tools I wouldn't need again. Yard maintenance is just work. I call it my "gym" lol.

My mortgage payments will go down over time unlike rent that just goes up. On the downside my property taxes and insurance costs have gone up as the value of my home has gone up. I have great neighbors also.

[–] quietserena@retrolemmy.com 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You mention ant - if I may recommend, it's worth getting a bug guy to look over your house. I would make sure to get the ones where they have entomologists on staff instead of cheap Joe's Bug Service. Especially if you live in a place where there are termites, you want to get ahead of that.

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[–] watson387@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 week ago

You're still better off owning a house and paying for repairs than paying rent. Even with the cost of repairs it's most likely cheaper in the long run and you're your own landlord.

[–] humble_boatsman@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

And the more you open up to fix the more systemic problems you find. In an old/fixer house. Try to pick one project at a time. Spend some money when u have too. Have seen some smart people locate home improvement grants for upgrades/HVAC. You'll need to spend money. No avoiding it. In a couple years you'll forget how bad it all seemed and get used to the minor annoyances you haven't gotten too. And don't forget to learn some things. Buy a bug pump sprayer and specific chemicals on line. Learn how important gutters are and getting storm water away from the foundations. Get some rugs to cover the gaps and caulk the cracks. Most importantly A good partner for the decorating to make u forget it's a shitty house no matter how much work you put in

To answer your question I just drink a lot.

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