this post was submitted on 27 Apr 2025
56 points (100.0% liked)

askchapo

22987 readers
308 users here now

Ask Hexbear is the place to ask and answer ~~thought-provoking~~ questions.

Rules:

  1. Posts must ask a question.

  2. If the question asked is serious, answer seriously.

  3. Questions where you want to learn more about socialism are allowed, but questions in bad faith are not.

  4. Try !feedback@hexbear.net if you're having questions about regarding moderation, site policy, the site itself, development, volunteering or the mod team.

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS
 

I hope it's fucking funny.

all 40 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] dead@hexbear.net 53 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Funniest possible treat shortage would be fireworks. Independence Day is only 2 months away. Fireworks were originally invented in China. 82% of fireworks in the world are made in China.

Every Independence Day of Trump's first presidency, the hogs went wild with fireworks. Imagine July 4, the first Independence Day of Trump's second term, and a shortage of fireworks. Hogs would go nuts.

[–] Omegamint@hexbear.net 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I’ll bet anything that most of the fireworks will be procured before the tariffs. Probably a bit of an increase of prices, but not insane. Next year though? Lol

[–] dead@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I did some websurfing, saw some various news articles on firework tariffs. Some firework companies have halted shipments. Then I came across the /r/fireworks subreddit. I'm seeing a lot of posts by people who are saying that they are firework retailers and have canceled their orders from China. Some posts say that the tariff on fireworks was at 59% as of 25 days ago. People are saying that 2026 is "America's 250th Birthday", 250 years since 1776. Time will tell, I guess

https://old.reddit.com/r/fireworks/comments/1jq6ief/what_are_you_going_to_do_about_tariffs/

[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 2 points 2 weeks ago

A Reddit link was detected in your comment. Here are links to the same location on alternative frontends that protect your privacy.

[–] SteamedHamberder@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

amerikkka ingenuity + fireworks shortage = loads of ER admissions.

[–] dead@hexbear.net 1 points 1 week ago

I was imagining that hogs will decide to fire guns haphazardly in lack of fireworks. I hadn't considered hogs crafting homemade fireworks but that would be very funny as well.

[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 40 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Lack of chocolate and coffee due to global warming is gonna cause some fits. Idk if it is running for the banks kinda fits but definitely some imperial anxiety

[–] duderium@hexbear.net 27 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Isn’t it always toilet paper, for Freudian reasons?

[–] Gorillatactics@hexbear.net 16 points 2 weeks ago

I still think the the toilet paper hoarding during the pandemic was because they copied what they saw on tv. If you're fillming multiple takes of chaotic crowds in a store to show a burgeoning disaster its easier if you have the extras carry toilet paper than heavy bags of rice.

[–] darkmode@hexbear.net 10 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

it’ll just force the remaining barbarians to get a $30 bidet

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 9 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Unfortunately no, some folks just refuse to wash their damn asses.

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 8 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

but it won't be $30, it will be at least $60 if not $90 muahahahaha!

[–] someone@hexbear.net 6 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

And it'll require a phone app to set up and use.

[–] Robert_Kennedy_Jr@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Know someone who has a wifi enabled bidet that becomes inoperable during software updates.

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 1 points 1 week ago

amazing time to be alive

[–] darkmode@hexbear.net 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 2 weeks ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] darkmode@hexbear.net 3 points 2 weeks ago

proportionally a bidet purchase will still make each poop cost less

[–] buh@hexbear.net 26 points 2 weeks ago

it's paradoxically gonna be computer parts and smartphones lathe-of-heaven

[–] MelaniaTrump@hexbear.net 24 points 2 weeks ago

Ozempic is causing a shortage of beautiful American man boob

:thicc-trump:

[–] SteamedHamberder@hexbear.net 20 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] FALGSConaut@hexbear.net 15 points 2 weeks ago

Implying cracker's use flavour when cooking

[–] FidelChadstro@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago

Garlic bulbs have gotten hella small the left few weeks

[–] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Are we at risk of this? Because that's not something I want to hear.

[–] SteamedHamberder@hexbear.net 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

More than half of garlic sold in the US is imported, mostly from China.

[–] Enjoyer_of_Games@hexbear.net 4 points 2 weeks ago

it will be considerably easier for domestic garlic production to be stepped up than manufactured goods.

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 19 points 2 weeks ago

Jalapeno poppas frothingfash

[–] tamagotchicowboy@hexbear.net 17 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

People make their whole personalities the 'tee hee I luv coffee' sort, so I would guess that. Or ice cream in the summer, close call.

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 14 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I'll fight someone for tequila

[–] DefinitelyNotAPhone@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Tequila is definitely going to disappear due to agave going extinct at some point, isn't it? kitty-birthday-sad

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 9 points 2 weeks ago
[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 4 points 2 weeks ago

just let her go, Tequila will never love you for you!

[–] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 12 points 2 weeks ago

They're sold out of Made in China™ dildos!!

[–] hotcouchguy@hexbear.net 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] EllenKelly@hexbear.net 7 points 2 weeks ago

They banned vapes in australia at the start of this year, people just started smoking (yes you can still get vapes, yea they were mostly always under the counter)

raise the busfair in brasil .30c? Riots, raise the busfair $2 in australia, a public transport users association gets some media coverage tut tutting

[–] Meltyheartlove@hexbear.net 10 points 2 weeks ago

Blue chew and blue chew accessories