this post was submitted on 28 Jan 2026
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A Boring Dystopia

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This is an update to this post.

This weekend, Amazon is premiering its $40 million Melania Trump documentary. It's pretty clearly a bribe to the Trump family.

We're going to disrupt the big premiere weekend by messing up Melania's Amazon search results. Specifically, we're going to amplify the paranormal erotic thriller novel Melania: Devourer of Men so it's high in the results. Maybe #1!

The book is perfect: It's absurd, the cover is ridiculous, and it's free, so we're not giving Amazon any money. (Fun fact: It's free because of YOU, the users of A Boring Dystopia. After your comments on the last post I reached out to the author, and they agreed to make the book free this weekend.)

Currently, the book ranks #29 in Amazon search results for Melania. But all the other Melania results seem pretty weak (lol), so we can pull this off pretty easily. We just need people to:

  1. "Buy" the book (it's free)
  2. Share this post and get other people to "buy" the book.

That's it.

Here's a link to the book, in case your Lemmy client stripped out the links above: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07HN9XC1H

Please share and we can celebrate as an erotic novel about a bat monster Melania Trump becomes a higher and higher search result on Amazon!

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[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 119 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I can positively recommend some other bedside reading from the same author:

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 47 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

wait is she a couch animorph

that's not even a good couch thats an ikea special

[–] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 37 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Look at this guy getting all snobby about the couches he fucks; like he's better than the rest of us :-D

[–] regedit@lemmy.zip 10 points 3 weeks ago

Fuck, you made me wake my wife with that one!

[–] Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus 10 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

It's Melania's magic power - but will it be enough to get her husband back from Peter Thiel's claws?

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[–] Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus 19 points 3 weeks ago

I bought it because i appreciate the gesture of making his melania fanfic free for this stunt lol

My Amazon recommendations will never be the same again

[–] bajabound@lemmy.world 49 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

I got my copy, but this also looks like a great option.

[–] FalschgeldFurkan@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago

Stupid sexy free speech

[–] Broadfern@lemmy.world 41 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I now own a digital copy of this book.

[–] IamtheMorgz@lemmy.world 37 points 3 weeks ago (7 children)

They already stopped people from buying it, I guess.

[–] devdoggy@lemmy.world 43 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

This is not true. I just bought the book.

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 25 points 3 weeks ago

maybe you need to make a Very Private... uh... Nurchase.

[–] criticon@lemmy.ca 15 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

You can't get Kindle books on the Amazon app, you need to go thru a browser or the Kindle app

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[–] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 11 points 3 weeks ago

If you're on your phone/in the app it may stop you from buying it without the Kindle app.

[–] mulcahey@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm hearing mixed things. Do you have a Kindle? It might not show up unless you've set one up. Maybe that's it?

[–] Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus 13 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

I don't have a kindle and just bought it!

E: It says Kindle for Web for me, is that a thing that can be activated manually? it's been ages since i used amazon

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[–] danc4498@lemmy.world 32 points 3 weeks ago

I am going to do this, but I assume Amazon has a way of pushing its promoted content to the top.

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 27 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

If I were an Amazon exec I'd hope for this. The bribe has already done its work and if no one sees they film there will be fewer complaints and bad reviews written about it.

[–] mulcahey@lemmy.world 22 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Kinda think "The #2 Amazon result is an erotic novel where she's a bat monster" is probably not a good look

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[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 27 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Lol

Her husband gets all the attention. But she has something to hide, too. Melania Trump had it all. A former model living luxuriously high above New York City, she had her every whim catered to and her every want met, far from the public eye. But when her famous husband becomes President of the United States and leaves for Washington, her quiet life is thrown into disarray. Now, surrounded by young, strapping Secret Service agents and pursued by the cunning and handsome FBI director James Comey, Melania must work to keep everything from falling apart. Because Melania has secrets of her own –– deadly secrets –– and no one yet knows how far she'll go to protect them. "The best erotic supernatural political thriller I've read this week." - Christine Sims, author of Taken by the T-Rex "The Hunger Games meets 50 Shades of Grey … this was everything I didn’t know I was looking for in a book!" - Dani Fankhauser, author of Shameless: How I Lost My Virginity and Kept My Faith "I don't know what this is, but I'm totally down for this shit." - Jinn from Mercy Bar

What a niche

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 21 points 3 weeks ago

As the mod of the bat community, I heartily approve of this effort. Long live erotic bat monsters!

[–] SarahValentine@lemmy.blahaj.zone 20 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Melania film? You mean the Melania porn film? The Melania porn film I just made up? That Melania porn film? Sorry but I can't really discuss the nonexistent Melania porn film at this time.

[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 23 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Melania was doing lesbian porn in 1996. Stormy Daniels was a stripper in 1996 and started doing porn six years later.

We have every reason to believe that there is a Stormy Daniels/Melania Trump movie out there somewhere.

[–] SarahValentine@lemmy.blahaj.zone 15 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

God dammit I can't even make up wild enough lies to miss the insane truth.

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[–] lovely_reader@lemmy.world 19 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

This is a fun idea, but unfortunately Amazon's search results are pay to play. (That's why they're always so bad.)

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[–] Lucelu2@lemmy.zip 17 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Melania is the worst first lady we ever had in the US. She is at base, the most uninteresting person. She is supposed to be on "the Five" tomorrow. I hope they ask her uncomfortable questions but I bet it will mostly be softball bullshit questions. She sucks and is unintelligent, just greedy and an Epstein operative/prop, as it is how she met the Orange Asshole. I hope she remains stuck with him because those who marry for money should be required to earn it.

[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 14 points 3 weeks ago

She's not the worst. I'll take a boring grifter over Nancy fucking Reagan puppeting her mushbrained husband to ignore the AIDS crisis.

[–] Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus 15 points 3 weeks ago

I'm doing my part!

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 15 points 3 weeks ago
[–] RagingRobot@lemmy.world 14 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

I'm sure like 2 people were planning to watch it

[–] smeenz@lemmy.nz 11 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] ExplosiveLynx@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 10 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I just had an epiphany. i was on a team that made a film my senior year of high school. it was a little high school short. i mean, scott ran a good crew it was high quality for high school short but it was still a 30 minute high school short. i ran the camera and my forearm also played The Lunch Lady (uncredited). We sold it to HBO. I don't know our viewing statistics or how much it sold for (this was our buddy Scott's dream, we were just along for the ride and to help him get there), we won a handful of film festivals and scott no joke got an award at Sundance but there were about 400 people at our premiere. I can now say I no joke beat the Melania movie and that gives me a little hit of dopamine, maybe a big one let's see how this goes.

every kid on youtube is a more successful creator if they've earned back enough money to pay for their webcams omg.

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[–] Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 3 weeks ago

It's up to 11th place as of the writing of this comment.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

is there a oooooo i just saw forbidden loveseat

is there a chuck tingle we could boost too?

edit: excuse me Two time Hugo Finalist and Goodreads nominee Dr. Chuck Tingle.

if you are Mssr. Boehninger, this is the best strategy to sell books i tell you hwhat

[–] waterSticksToMyBalls@lemmy.world 12 points 3 weeks ago

"Melania d" gives zero search suggestions so it seems like they've already quashed this

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 11 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 8 points 3 weeks ago

I saw that. Melania has to choose. No one can serve two masters, you will love one and hate the other.

[–] myfunnyaccountname@lemmy.zip 11 points 3 weeks ago

The maga cucks will spin this into a good thing. “Look how much people love her, they are writing stories about her.”

[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 11 points 3 weeks ago

What has that fluff every done other than spit out crotch fruit for a monster?

[–] Hello_there@fedia.io 10 points 3 weeks ago

For search rankings, you would have to Google it and then click on the right link

[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 10 points 3 weeks ago

Yay! That was fun. More like this, please.

[–] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

LOVE getting new books. Thanks.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

Purchased, thanks!

[–] thagoat@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 3 weeks ago
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