this post was submitted on 11 Mar 2026
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Chapotraphouse

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[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 54 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Virgin Modern Captains: "I'm worried my ship may get blown up by rockets if I sail there, pwwwwwwweeeessssseeee don't make me do it! doggirl-tears"

Chad Age of Sail Captains: "I will outrun the Spanish AND the Dutch Navies or I'll DIE TRYING gigachad-hd"

[–] Carl@hexbear.net 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

It's not even the captains, it's the investment companies that own the boat.

Perhaps we need a maoist uprising against the boatlords.

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

We need to RETVRN to voyaging. Seafaring has been ruined by capitalist speculation, it was way better when some half mad alcoholic recruited you from a pub to go cross the Cape of Good Hope on the slim chance you'd end up back in Liverpool with a boatload of silk and tea.

[–] ClathrateG@hexbear.net 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

recruited? is that what they call when you feal a crack on the back of your head and wake up on a ship miles out to sea

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 7 points 1 week ago

Well at least I'm no longer tied to my feudal obligations, and if I don't die I'll get enough money to spend like 2 years tavern-hopping in London!

[–] Collatz_problem@hexbear.net 49 points 2 weeks ago

We're gonna accelerate the contradictions so much, you may even get tired of accelerating. And you'll say, 'Please, please. It's too many contradictions. We can't take it anymore. Mr. President, it's too much.'

[–] InexplicableLunchFiend@hexbear.net 41 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

If you all sail through at the same time, they can't get all of you

Everyone attempts to rush the strait, getting bottlenecked and congested and picked off like flies

[–] LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins@hexbear.net 26 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

haven't seen anybody mention this but if a shitload of ships get wrecked in the strait of hormuz, well, they're no mines but all that wreckage doesn't exactly improve how navigable it will be

[–] hellinkilla@hexbear.net 29 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Can Americanism be this great again?

[–] fox@hexbear.net 10 points 2 weeks ago

You'd need way way way more ships

[–] MayoPete@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Initial D music intensifies

[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 7 points 1 week ago

MULTI-CANAL DRIFTING!!

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 1 week ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] InexplicableLunchFiend@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

at the narrowest point the strait is 20 miles wide

yeah but even that whole width isn't necessarily usable as it is, I read something like the shipping lanes are like 2 miles wide in either direction? seems like that'd be for a reason idk

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 25 points 2 weeks ago

Lotsa people don't know this... But if you pretend a chokepoint isn't a chokepoint then no chokepoint is there. Simple. No problems. Also - woke bad.

[–] Damarcusart@hexbear.net 18 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)
[–] Indifference_Engine@hexbear.net 10 points 2 weeks ago

We call it the Three Stooges stratagem

[–] JustSo@hexbear.net 41 points 2 weeks ago

I like when western assets get blownt up but I don't like when the oceans have to cope with even more of our pollution.

sicko-wistful

[–] mayakovsky@hexbear.net 36 points 2 weeks ago

"The ships yearn for the drones"

a-little-trolling

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 33 points 2 weeks ago

Curb Your Enthusiasm theme plays

[–] AFineWayToDie@hexbear.net 33 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 27 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] casskaydee@hexbear.net 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 19 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'll leave when i'm good and ready!

[–] corgiwithalaptop@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago

One of the best bits in major network comedies

[–] segfault11@hexbear.net 17 points 2 weeks ago

kubrick-stare wet ass c-word

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 30 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 12 points 2 weeks ago

it will now be towed outside the environment

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 12 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)
[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 26 points 2 weeks ago

Cowards! Stay and fight!! The captain goes down with the ship!!!

[–] FnordPrefect@hexbear.net 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Updated the info on the ship to better reflect its commitment to trying to sneak through SoH

[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

confucian proverb: ship going through strait of hormuz sideways is going to...

[–] SchillMenaker@hexbear.net 25 points 2 weeks ago

I think Donald Trump should use the Strait of Hormuz

[–] merdaverse@lemmy.zip 20 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Is that a metaphor for the Western economy?

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 9 points 2 weeks ago

I think so. Sadly - the idea isn't mine. I stole the text+image idea from Bluesky.

[–] Wertheimer@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago

Where are the big beautiful boaters now that their god needs them the most?

[–] VapeNoir@hexbear.net 11 points 1 week ago

Yeah me too

[–] Bieren@lemmy.today 4 points 2 weeks ago

He wants the escalation