Word to the wise stay the fuck away from women who try to separate you from your friends
this post was submitted on 27 Mar 2026
489 points (91.7% liked)
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Ok that’s 3 minutes, and the rest of the evening?
Good cocktails take make than 3 minutes to enjoy
I'm not a good cocktail though, I'm a bad lay.
So 3 minutes it is.
On an unrelated note, I may now understand JD Vance a tiny bit better.
Where the fuck am I supposed to sit?
I have 2 good suggestions
Yeah… that’s a pretty convincing reason not to leave 😂
She has a point.
Nah, she's playing too many games expecting the guy to see past that camouflage and take the hint.
She might just be being polite
I'm mostly just impressed
Ok I got little bit distracted.
Source?
Just swipe your credit card and leave.
When you’re dating JD Vance and he wants you to role play as the sofa cushions.
Wonderful
Bah! You beat me to it!
Bonk!
Guys, ill be 5 mins late.
Plenty of time to shower afterwards
5 mins includes the shower
4mins is plunty of time
Me: Dinner time!
Bc then she will just keep on doing this and you’ll have nowhere to sit and play Nintendo
Why so many downvotes?
Some people dont like "horny posts"
how would that work though ? she's so low to the ground
There's multiple ways. Depends what's your strongest areas are too - lower body, core, or upper body strength.
I agree, that's an awkward height. I can't think of a comfortable position to match this pose on that particular couch.
Gonna have to plank it
- Feet up on the couch on either side of her waist, hands on the back of the sofa for support
- Kneeled down on the floor using mouth/hands
I feel like either of those would work even for tall people
yeah there's no shot, I'm 511 and my legs are quite long so this would not work for me lmao
~~I have never known any of the personalities depicted in this joke and suspect that it is a complete fabrication that only seems funny or relatable if one is used to imagining the world according to their wishful thinking~~
I retract this remark as I totally misinterpreted the post. Rather than sharing my revised opinion I will remain silent as penance lol
You've never had a clingy partner that used sex as a motivator?
If I could find a girl that just wanted to stay home and fuck all the time I would be ecstatic. It's always "don't go out but also I only want to sit around watching boring TV shows".
No, but I don't see how that is what's depicted in the meme anyways? Who would be being clingy or using sex as a motivator here? Perhaps I've completely misunderstood this
The guy wants to leave his current situation (hanging out with girlfriend) to go hangout with his buddies. Her not wanting him to leave offers sex in exchange for him staying (this is being clingy and using sex to achieve her goal). Its absolutely something that has happened to me and I feel is genuinely relatable among many. While in reality this would likely be a single offhanded comment. The joke here exaggerates that common situation by putting her in an exceptionally silly and sexual pose. The absurdity of the pose on top of the general relatable nature make it "funny". It is also just a shitpost
Jesus Christ I read the roles exactly backwards I'm a moron. I thought it was implying that she wanted to fuck the friends. My bad. I guess the horniness of the image prompted my mind to assume this was some kind of mickey7 type post
Thats why I'm here friend
How much can a banana cost? 60 seconds? 90 seconds?
Seriously, they can wait in the car for 5 minutes.
I'd still go. Bros before hoes.
I would take care of the hoes and then go see the bros.
Unless she's been withholding sex as a manipulation tactic, in which case the ho got to go.
The she ain’t yo ho no mo
bro fo sho
Hellllll yeah bro
Enhance!
She's holding my drink for me? How sweet.
Stop giving them lifehacks!