128
submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by Bizarroland@kbin.social to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

Assume that the future can change based on your actions, so any historical information that you bring along with you from the intervening 25 years may quickly drift out of the new realities history.

Edit: also assume that you can be given a healthy 21-year-old body if you want or take your previous self's place.

Further, identification will be provided for you if you were not born at that time.

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] Delphia@lemmy.world 115 points 8 months ago

Simple. Im ripping up the ticket.

Since my actions have knock on effects and the ticket is 1 way that means Id have to abandon my wife and child and given how much my actions would change things, effectively unmake my daughter.

The worlds fucked, I might be able to unfuck it but theres a better chance Id just create a different flavor of shit sandwich. But to know Id never hear "Dayyydeee come pway wif meeeeee" again.

Fuck it. Let it burn.

[-] Protoknuckles@lemmy.world 16 points 8 months ago

If you got a camping backpack maybe you could bring them! That's my plan.

[-] Bizarroland@kbin.social 12 points 8 months ago

What would your response be if you could take your family with you?

[-] Delphia@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Id need seed money so Id get the lottery numbers for the biggest win shortly after I arrive, digital copies of the worlds financial newspapers for 25 years, some targeted stock info on companies like Google, Amazon, Apple, Intel, facebook and other "Big Tech" and media firms. Knowing when to buy certain stocks and when to dump them would allow me to slow grow myself into someone that could have serious levels of control over a vast number of industries with far reach.

To make an impact with that reach, Id also have a serious SHITLOAD of research papers for anything related to green energy, cancer research and any other medical research that could save a shitload of lives. With 25 years of "leaps and bounds" in tech and medicine up my sleeve Id start a green energy company that knows which competition to buy and when, what "suggestions" to offer my researchers when I stop by for a visit. Same with biotech and medical research.

Given 25 years Id be a global renewable energy mogul who has done more to cure cancer (especially in kids) aids and a host of other diseases than any other man in history, controlling significant portions of the mass media in every first world country I could get my hooks into AND with the ear of very serious people in academic circles... Id be a fucking kingmaker with such an amazing public persona that to come at me would be career suicide for anyone in politics.

load more comments (10 replies)
load more comments (7 replies)
[-] ilovetacos@lemmy.world 72 points 8 months ago
[-] neidu@feddit.nl 25 points 8 months ago

Just hope your school bully doesn't find it.

[-] ShittyBeatlesFCPres@lemmy.world 19 points 8 months ago

God forbid we end up on the 1985 timeline. Can you imagine if someone like Biff became rich and powerful?

[-] Brickhead92@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

Looks at every billionaire... Yeah imagine that.

[-] grue@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

The joke is that alternate-1985 Biff was literally based on Trump, specifically.

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] drolex@sopuli.xyz 69 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I come with scientific evidence of the impeding doom that will be brought by climate change and urge the world's powers to reduce greenhouse gas emissions while there is still time! Surely everybody will listen to my proofs and act to protect the world!

[-] mutant_zz@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago

We already had that evidence by the 1960s!

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

Honestly it might be better to bring proof gore is better than bush or they he won florida

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[-] CIA_chatbot@lemmy.world 49 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Lottery numbers and a historical record of the stock market: first, win lottery then invest based on performance

Become a billionaire, then join the oligarchy and use my stock knowledge to bankrupt the rest of the oligarchy

[-] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 39 points 8 months ago

At some point, wouldn't having future knowledge of the stock market either lead to you changing the stock market with the presence of your money until your predictions lose their accuracy, or else get you investigated for insider trading due to it being statistically insanely unlikely to be that lucky?

[-] grabyourmotherskeys@lemmy.world 9 points 8 months ago

You could just spread it across a bunch of GICs and then ETFs that were solid performers. You have your lottery money, you just need to earn enough to live the way you want. With enough invested but diversified you could make a fortune without influencing anything as a result of personal choices.

If anythjng, the initial lottery win will have the biggest impact on the timeline, assuming you lay low afterward.

Now, here's the thing. I'd say you would be sharing those winnings with the original winner unless you prevented them from getting the ticket so find a jackpot twice as big as you need and hope a bunch of yous from alternate timeline don't get the same idea.

That's what would happen to me and I'd end up winning about $3.50.

[-] Bizarroland@kbin.social 8 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

You could also find some of the lottery winners that absolutely hated what happened to their lives after they won and win the draw right before their ticket would have won.

That way you spare them the misery that the money brought them and you get a nice chunk of change for yourself in the process.

load more comments (6 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[-] DharmaCurious@startrek.website 14 points 8 months ago

... It freaks me out that is exactly my plan that I've spitballed in the shower several times.

[-] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 8 months ago

Cia_chatbot knows.

load more comments (7 replies)
[-] hightrix@lemmy.world 32 points 8 months ago

All of Wikipedia on a thumb drive

List of winning power ball numbers for the past 2 decades.

$20 cash to buy bitcoin

That’s enough. More than enough money to never work again and info to help stop 9/11, etc…

[-] grue@lemmy.world 16 points 8 months ago

$20 cash to buy bitcoin

Bring a 2023 model computer back with you and you could just mine all the bitcoin yourself.

Hell, you could even temporally-plagiarize Satoshi Nakamoto and invent it yourself.

[-] hightrix@lemmy.world 20 points 8 months ago

This is a great idea but it requires effort and if I were to mine 10billion bitcoin very early, that may change the future of bitcoin such that it never hits 30k+ value per. It seems safer to simply buy 1000 of them at a $0.10 to resale at 10k+.

My plan is minimal effort, minimal impact to anyone that isn’t me, and to get all the money I could ever need.

load more comments (6 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[-] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 24 points 8 months ago

A healthy 21 body and 1999? Fuck taking over the world, and I don't need your stinking backpack, just tell me where to get that ticket and where to show up, I'm not going to miss this! I'm taking a cyanide pill though when 2020 rolls around; I'm not doing this shit again.

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] JakenVeina@lemm.ee 23 points 8 months ago

Grays Sports Almanac

[-] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 21 points 8 months ago

I would have no inclination to take over the world. But if I could go back to that date, I would make a million different decisions over the next few years to steer my life in a much wiser direction.

[-] Mnemnosyne@sh.itjust.works 20 points 8 months ago

Get every flagship CPU and GPU from 2000 to today that I can get my hands on. Also as much open source code as I can get hold of. And especially AI stuff - there's several fully open source models, so bring those, and as much technical writings on them as possible.

Speaking of which, download every science paper published since 2000 that I can get hold of, in every possible field.

Get as much info on the 2000 election as possible, to hand to Al Gore, see if he can win that election with a solid unassailable margin.

Research stocks, lottery, and everything else I can to get fast money within the shortest possible period of time after I get there, so I can get super rich before the butterfly effect makes predictions impossible, I need billions in seed money and I need it fast.

Then use that money to start a private research group, and hand them all the scientific papers I brought. Get those experts to work studying all this knowledge and figure out what can be turned into practical technology. Turn some of this into profit-making devices to fund continued development, but release as much as possible for free.

Essentially, deluge the world in as much new technology as possible, mostly free and open source, holding back only as much as necessary in order to fund continued research.

And oh jeez the pharmaceutical industry. Release for free every drug made since 2000, so the pharmaceutical industry can't get their patents in them.

Big list of stuff there, but if I pulled off even half of it, the world would probably be a much better place in 25 years than in my original timeline.

load more comments (5 replies)
[-] cyborganism@lemmy.ca 20 points 8 months ago

An entire offline copy of Wikipedia up to Jan 1 2024 on a tablet. Having all the world events up to that date available to consult at my fingertips, I could use it in so many ways.

[-] DeepFriedDresden@kbin.social 9 points 8 months ago

Don't forget a charger, otherwise you'll be screwed for awhile

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] sciencesebi@feddit.ro 17 points 8 months ago

Information is power. A simple smartphone loaded with major historical decisions, sports results is enough to make you a billionaire. Take some tech textbooks to stay ahead of the game, maybe some newly developed medicine.

[-] Bizarroland@kbin.social 8 points 8 months ago

Given that the AIDS epidemic was still in full swing at the time, just being able to teach medicine makers how to make pRep would make you a billionaire just from the licensing fees.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] lloydsmart@discuss.tchncs.de 15 points 8 months ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] val@infosec.pub 14 points 8 months ago

I've got no motivation to take over the world, nor am I sure it's really possible in a life time. I don't really have a non-boring answer to this hypothetical.

If the ticket is available anyway I'd happily take it, I'm single at the moment with no dependents and being younger and healthier would be huge. There are lots of ways to make money with the knowledge of future history, even if it'll change when you start impacting it, and any one of them could make me wealthy enough to never have to work again in my life and do so wherever I please.

I've never really understood the need of the rich to continually amass wealth or how they spend it.

[-] gandalf_der_12te@feddit.de 13 points 8 months ago
[-] detalferous@lemm.ee 8 points 8 months ago

Bitcoin has outperformed stocks by about 100,000-fold. All you need is a fiver to invest at the beginning.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] eluvatar@programming.dev 13 points 8 months ago

Probably a backpack full of smart phones, go sell them and retire.

Then cry that it'll be a long time until I can use USB C again.

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] peter@feddit.uk 13 points 8 months ago

Invent Apple Google and Amazon all at once. Yes, I know they all existed at that time but I would just do their best ideas before them.

[-] veroxii@aussie.zone 10 points 8 months ago

New Pied Piper

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] captnanonymous@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago

The bag is full of post-1999 MTG cards that I will trade for pre-1999 MTG cards.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] xia 12 points 8 months ago

All the FLOSS software i could put my hands on (with source code), a couple awesome smartphones, wikipedia dump, sports almanac, and a stable-diffusion rig.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] KISSmyOS@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Why should I take over the world?
I'd bring ripped jeans and a Nirvana t-shirt with an unbuttoned flannel shirt on top and chill for a couple years until everything turns to shit again.

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] Clbull@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I would bring Wednesday 6th January 1999's winning lottery numbers, five books chronicling the last 25 years of British history, history of businesses, history of the tech industry between 1998 and 2023, modern military history, and the history of Blackrock. Also I would choose a healthy 21-year-old body.

The plan is... win the lottery for some immediate starting capital, make well-informed investments, effectively become the Warren Buffet of Britain and weasel my way into the world elite, befriending figures like David Cameron, Tony Blair, Jeffrey Epstein, Bill Clinton, etc. I would make timely investments into new startups like Facebook, Twitter, etc, jump on the Bitcoin, Dogecoin and Ethereum bandwagons early and make it my aim to become the richest man in the world. With that wealth I'd then buy more shares in Blackrock, Blackwater and Lockheed Martin, seemingly be at the top of my game as head of a PMC. I would assist in conflicts that maintain the status quo as best as I could.

I would also do a tonne of work with African military forces, make loads of private investments in African firms and , and beat China to the punch.

With the exception of Blackwater, I would not aim to be a majority shareholder in any of these companies. I'd keep maybe... 5 to 10 percent of shares in the really successful companies, lose a bit of money in falls to not arouse too much suspicion, but I would otherwise climb to the top of the PMC ladder and put my fingers in as many NATO pies as possible.

That's what I'd do if my aim as a time traveller was to take over the world. In actuality, I'd rather just win the lottery, diversify my investments and retire comfortably. I don't desire world domination.

[-] Luci@lemmy.ca 10 points 8 months ago

A current download of Wikipedia.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.cafe 9 points 8 months ago

A computer with lists of winning lottery numbers, stock prices by day of all major companies, archived copies of webpages or, preferably, scanned in newspaper articles of all world events from 1999 until now, and lists of every politician and individual with net worths over $300 million.

Also patents for LCD screens, the microchips in use in the 10's and now, the efficient solar panels China cranks out if I can get a hold of that information, modern efficient wind turbines, etc. Also important scientific papers written between then and now, especially for Ozempic and Wegovy.

Also, this might be the one practical use for dumb shit like Chat GPT and its ilk, so we're bringing along a couple of GPUs and copies of each major open source AI I can scramble up.

I use this information to:

  1. Hopefully prevent 9/11

  2. Become filthy fucking rich

  3. Infiltrate the elite and start bumping off motherfuckers one by one Count of Monte Cristo style

  4. Distribute my ill gotten gains to the masses and use the rest to stop climate collapse

#EatTheRich

load more comments (6 replies)
[-] lntl@lemmy.ml 8 points 8 months ago

A Lenovo P series with deepfacelab. I would work public perception of Dubya (and Jeb) to avoid the decades of war crimes.

load more comments
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2023
128 points (93.2% liked)

Asklemmy

43027 readers
1455 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS