maybe it happened
this post was submitted on 10 Jun 2026
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Why does someone likely in their 40's need to give someone a chance, particularly someone that thoughtless?
I'd say she already gave him a chance - she said "yes," after all. He was so close, he just needed to use his own brain and put a little personal effort into planning the date. He could've even been honest about not knowing what to do and said something like, "I'd like to have some of your input to make our plans. I was thinking of a movie, but there's a museum not far from me. The park's really nice this time of year, too, if you'd prefer to be outdoors. Do any of those sound good to you? Do you have any ideas to add?"
I mean, that's what I'd do. It's not hard to think of things if you know a person a bit, but if you don't know them well enough yet to know what they'd like, that's okay too! Make it clear you want something you'd both enjoy and turn it into a discussion. No AI is going to know what she likes better than she does, so just go to the source.
And if that's too much effort, then perhaps dating in itself would be too much effort.
No one owes anyone a chance, but one should take chances. This is Dating 101. If someone rejects me over some petty issue like this, they're going to reject me later for something equally petty. And dating gets hard as we age and take on baggage from past relationships. I only drew the line at MAGA, racism, shit like that. Hell, my wife still attributes some of my thoughts and actions as if I'm her ex.
And who says he was thoughtless? Maybe he found the idea cute and wanted to fly it by her? He's likely not in a social group that hates AI like we do here. Had a date propose we meet at the antique/thrift mall. One could take that as she's poor or cheap or whatever. Her reasoning when we met? "People on first dates shouldn't spend money on each other until they catch a vibe." (My words, hers were better but I forget.)
tl;dr: Too much room to misinterpret someone when you first meet, especially before a first date. If they seem attractive enough in the ways you seek, give them a chance. You owe it to yourself, not them.
I'll just say that dating changes as you age
Well aware! I was dating hot and heavy at 49-52, been there, done that. But we should be aware that our aging assumptions and baggage can hold us back. Take a chance or die alone, whatever floats one's boat, that's their call.
What ever floats your boat is absolutely correct, this man did not float this ladies boat so she nipped it in the bud.