this post was submitted on 15 Mar 2026
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Funny

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[–] dantel@programming.dev 64 points 21 hours ago (3 children)

I like how this also implies those people's kids all end up in hell...

[–] Catoblepas@piefed.blahaj.zone 60 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

Sorry, original sin means if you die before you’re old enough to understand religion you go straight to hell. I don’t make the rules.

(Neither do Christians, but they think they do.)

[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 16 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Never fear! Mormons baptize the dead in case they died without the opportunity to be baptized during their lifetime. I love loopholes lol

[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 20 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Imagine being dragged, kicking and screaming, into Mormon heaven.

[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 15 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

I don't have to imagine, I dated a mormon girl once lol

[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 13 points 20 hours ago (1 children)
[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 6 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

lol actually it was the most vanilla experience possible

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 4 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago) (1 children)

Everyone is so kinky that vanilla is itself a kink.

[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 2 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

But, is it kinkier if I take my socks off, or leave them on?

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 3 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

That depends. Are they business socks, and is it business time?

[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 2 points 11 hours ago

sadly, lazy socks and lazy time

[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 9 points 19 hours ago (1 children)
[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 4 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

lol...i'm just glad i hadn't yet heard of their practice called soaking back then

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago) (1 children)

that was a fun urban legend to will into reality. those zoobies will not do anything

[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 8 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

if the magic underwear fits...

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 4 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

i think one of the defining characteristics of their magic underwear is that it doesn't fit

[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 3 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

yeah, it was all baggy on the girl i dated. and it smelled funny, but that could have just been her lol

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

oh gods she wasn't from upwind by the plant was she

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 14 hours ago

i thought that meant limbo contests

[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 12 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Those kids have been through enough. No need to sentence them to an eternity with the clergy.

[–] Cevilia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 hours ago

He just puts them in the TV lounge, apparently.

[–] imacatnotaman@lemmy.ml 5 points 20 hours ago

I like how this also implies that Satan exists as anything other than man's ego.