208
submitted 4 months ago by pooh@hexbear.net to c/memes@hexbear.net
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[-] hello_hello@hexbear.net 86 points 4 months ago

They are posting harder than us. Hexbear could never come up with bits this good (we are libs)

[-] blipblip@hexbear.net 44 points 4 months ago

Right how is nobody seeing this is a bit lmao

[-] BelieveRevolt@hexbear.net 49 points 4 months ago

He's literally a comedian, but this is a good bit because it's indistinguishable from the actual ”motivational” garbage you'd see on that site.

[-] Pandantic@midwest.social 20 points 4 months ago

Oh I hope this is true because these are exactly the kind of people who lurk in my nightmares.

[-] pooh@hexbear.net 19 points 4 months ago

Holy shit, are you telling me we all just got bamboozled here? If this really is a bit, it certainly fooled me.

[-] combat_brandonism@hexbear.net 22 points 4 months ago

many such cases!

[-] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 35 points 4 months ago

We don't have the levels of Evil in our souls to write this and not instantly erupt into flame

[-] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 79 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Strong and healthy business connections like Hitler had with IBM, Krupps and Henry Ford could save millions of lives

[-] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 51 points 4 months ago

This is what I'm saying

Rich Hitler would've just been waaaay more efficient at killing people

[-] mkultrawide@hexbear.net 62 points 4 months ago

Stopping the Holocaust one Vanguard ETF at a time.

[-] FishLake@lemmygrad.ml 46 points 4 months ago

Kind of pointless when you realize babies already understand concepts like securities and compound interest. Has he never seen Dreamworks Boss Baby?

[-] Waldoz53@hexbear.net 23 points 4 months ago

boss baby but hes actually baby hitler

[-] Comp4@hexbear.net 10 points 4 months ago
[-] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 41 points 4 months ago

“I would be cronies with Hitler”.

Is someone putting a gun to Linkedin members heads and forcing them to write nothingburgers of posts?

[-] BodyBySisyphus@hexbear.net 41 points 4 months ago

LinkedIn has become "Facebook that you need to post on to get a job" and I resent its existence.

[-] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 24 points 4 months ago

Anyone who decided that everyone should have a “personal brand” has a special place in the gulag.

What dumbass decided you need to become an industry celebrity before you officially hold even an internship in said industry?

[-] BodyBySisyphus@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago

Anyone who decided that everyone should have a “personal brand” has a special place in the gulag.

It's the marketers, they're the root cause of all this

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[-] supafuzz@hexbear.net 41 points 4 months ago

power of people in a business context, which is always morally good

there is no amount of reeducation that would fix people like this

[-] LocalMaxima@hexbear.net 36 points 4 months ago

First index fund was in 1972, but I guess this scenario already has time travel

[-] adultswim_antifa@hexbear.net 18 points 4 months ago

They had mutual funds and they were doing the dumbest shit with leveraging them in the late 20s and well you probably know what happened next.

[-] JayTwo@hexbear.net 34 points 4 months ago

This isn't shitposting? It's gotta be. Just because LinkedIn is a "professional" site doesn't mean that people won't do bits on it.

[-] JayTwo@hexbear.net 19 points 4 months ago

In fact there's something more hilarious about LinkedIn shitposting vs when it's done on "appropriate" sites because it's the same energy as stuff unironically posted to it every minute of the day, but just taken a tiny bit too far. And even then not that much more. But nevertheless enough to show how utterly unhinged business culture is.

[-] isgleas@lemmy.ml 33 points 4 months ago

They want to connect with you... emotionally

[-] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 18 points 4 months ago

I swear, these idiots think they’re geniuses for telling the internet “cronyism good”, because cronyism is just what “business connections” is.

[-] BobDole@hexbear.net 33 points 4 months ago

Time traveling to WW1, shooting his stupid-mustache having ass in the head and then giving AK-47’s to the Spartacists

[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 32 points 4 months ago

Mr. Hitler, sir, have you tried mindfulness?

[-] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 31 points 4 months ago

Hitler was rich as fuck, and since his wealth came from power abuse and embezzlement we can also said it was gained in fairly typical business context.

[-] nothx@hexbear.net 28 points 4 months ago

Or just give him the fucking art degree…

[-] Yor@hexbear.net 26 points 4 months ago

like this has to be a bit right? anakin-padme-2

[-] TheLastHero@hexbear.net 26 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

hold up, its actually genius. when Hitler loses all his stock options in The Big Sad he will just ventilate his brain in 1929 instead of 1945.

That or he somehow becomes even more antisemitic and tries to exact his revenge (in a business context of course)

[-] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 13 points 4 months ago

Mfw Hitler blame the jews for the crash and commits an even bigger genocide.

[-] pooh@hexbear.net 12 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Throwing baby Hitler into a wood chipper just seems so much easier tho

[-] hexinvictus@hexbear.net 23 points 4 months ago

100% this is written by AI

[-] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 23 points 4 months ago

Baby Hitler: gut ga bbbbbbb

Baby Hitler's Dad: Was machst du mit meinem Baby?

[-] Vampire@hexbear.net 23 points 4 months ago

I'm often asked "would you go back in time and kill baby Hitler?"

howwww often exactly is Ken Cheng asked this? I would like it quantified please. Like how many people have approached him and asked him this question in the past year.

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[-] CamillePagliacci@hexbear.net 21 points 4 months ago

This is obviously a bit guys.

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[-] AntiOutsideAktion@hexbear.net 21 points 4 months ago

Exiting my time machine I grab the baby while its mother's back is turned and abscond to a distant year where I can read this textbook out loud to a baby.

[-] plinky@hexbear.net 19 points 4 months ago

successful stock option holder hitler joins nazi party under himmler, what now, binch?

[-] itappearsthat@hexbear.net 19 points 4 months ago

Isn't this an actual matt yglasias line? "if CEOs couldn't have unchecked power they would just become warlords therefore capitalism good" is something that has flopped out of his brain as some point I'm pretty sure

[-] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 15 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

I mean....I don't want to be the guy to say European culture was the problem, but there were German concentration camps when Adolf was just 16 years old and British concentration camps before even that. Additionally Hitler wasn't responsible for eugenics, that was just Western European science originating in....the 1800's I believe? I mean scientists were literally publishing books on how the poor and the disabled were destroying society, and eugenics continued for a short while after the end of WW2 (until very recently as well if you include Israel and what's being done to people in detention camps at the border in America). Killing baby Hitler doesn't stop the psychopathy. Apparently the Nazis were huge fans of Ukraine because they were impressed with how dedicated the Ukrainians were to killing (Poles? Jewish people?). Balfour for example aided in the creation of Israel not out of a love for Jewish people, but because he was a rabid antisemite who wanted to remove Jewish people from Europe. Churchill actually admired Hitler and sent a letter telling him he actually agrees with him.

Basically Stalin shouldn't have stopped at Berlin.

[-] poppy_apocalypse@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago
[-] odmroz@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago

"I want to connect with you, emotionally :)" out-of-touch-ass mf

[-] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 13 points 4 months ago

Index funds are emotional for him, spreadsheets are his love language.

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[-] betelgeuse@hexbear.net 10 points 4 months ago

Hitler had some good ideas he just didn't embrace vertical integration and didn't understand KPIs. If I had a time machine I would go back and give Hitler Scrum.

[-] newmou@hexbear.net 9 points 4 months ago

A fascist made a business connection and saved a life today. Have you?

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this post was submitted on 07 Jun 2024
208 points (100.0% liked)

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