this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2025
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Cory Booker, known mainly from his child acting career in "Cory in the House", has been straight joinking and gerking for 21 hours straight in protest of Donald Trump. Insiders tell us that he has spent the whole day moving between increasingly esoteric erotica. According to his staff, he is now using a rolling pin to flatten his dick into a sheet while watching pregnant male roleplay on a v1.13 minecraft server set to extreme survival mode.

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[–] GoebbelsDeezNuts@hexbear.net 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

the libs on bluesky are being really annoying about this

[–] morrowind@lemmy.ml 16 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Bro really went on bluesky and then complained about the people on bluesky

[–] puckylinky@hexbear.net 13 points 1 week ago

God this trash can smells awful

I've twice posting links to bad takes on c/slop (the comm for posting bad takes) WITH CWs describing the takes in question, only to have people complaining that I made them see bad takes.

I think people have embraced the idea that free will doesn't really exist (probably true) too much and now expect society to deterministically lead them down a primrose path where they're never even given the option to make a(n even minorly) bad choice.

[–] corgiwithalaptop@hexbear.net 22 points 1 week ago
[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 20 points 1 week ago

My god, someone call the Parliament Funkadelican!

[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 19 points 1 week ago
[–] WIIHAPPYFEW@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

holy shit he just busted. The janitors are slicing sections of the carpet off with knives and putting them in bodybags jesus christ

[–] WIIHAPPYFEW@hexbear.net 9 points 1 week ago

A stray drop fucking pulverized dick durbin’s eye jfc I TOLD Cory not to add the furry pooltoy transformation art into the goonfolder

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago
[–] edge@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago

He's gonna filibust any moment now.

[–] AernaLingus@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Kumikommunism@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago
[–] TrustedFeline@hexbear.net 12 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I think David Blaine should run for senate

[–] Xenomorph@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago

Oh I love this! He could levitate some old ass senator binch three inches off the floor then drop them shattering every bone in their body because they're 101 years old.

[–] spudnik@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago

Change the laws or procedures or whatever so that filibustering only counts if you are confined within a small plexiglass cube suspended over the Senate floor

[–] turmoil@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago

Kamala to Cory: volcel-kamala

[–] dannoffs@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The people cried out for a hero and he didn't come.

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago

he'll get there.. he gerkin

[–] hexaflexagonbear@hexbear.net 7 points 1 week ago
[–] anindefinitearticle@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] Dessa@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago

Pretty sure that's Key from Key and Peele

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

dude is totally tweeking hard