this post was submitted on 17 Jun 2025
934 points (96.9% liked)

Funny

10271 readers
2121 users here now

General rules:

Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 110 points 5 days ago (15 children)

..yes? That's what you have to do. Maybe she says no. Maybe she says yes. Doing nothing definitely won't get you anywhere.

[–] Eheran@lemmy.world 63 points 5 days ago (1 children)

The issue is the "always works for me", the same way an old white man is going to have a lot less trouble with the police or telling a handicapped person to just walk the stairs because it "always works for me".

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Malfeasant@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

Doing nothing definitely won't get you anywhere.

Not necessarily true, I've never been conventionally attractive, but I've had women approach me multiple times, in fact all but one (out of... 6 I guess) of my long term relationships were initiated by the woman... Of course that was when I was young, now I'm 50 and going through a divorce, I'm not holding my breath...

[–] entwine413@lemm.ee 20 points 5 days ago (3 children)

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world 19 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

I asked a girl out once...she said yes. But it was touch and go there for a while before I asked. And let me be clear, I do not look like this guy. Still solid advice tho.

load more comments (11 replies)
[–] QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works 14 points 3 days ago

Bro looks like he Superman, they should have had him play Superman at some point

Instead of whatever the hell Man of Steel was

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 49 points 4 days ago (2 children)

i mean people tend to like confidence, also you get to stop wallowing in ignorance. conventionally attractive or not, either they say yes or no and then you get to move forward from there. going from not knowing to knowing, that is a positive.

[–] Saleh@feddit.org 29 points 4 days ago (13 children)

You should know when it is appropriate to ask and when not:

Don'ts:

  • complete strangers
  • people who cannot retreat, e.g. cashiers, waiters and the like, on a busy train/bus in an elevator etc.
  • people clearly not in a space to socialize.
  • asking for sex
  • being ambigious about intentions

Do's:

  • people you held a normal conversation with before
  • in a space where they are comfortable and either party can leave easily if things get awkward
  • being clear about it being a date
  • public place with individual privacy, e.g. going out for a coffee
  • no alcohol or other drugs
load more comments (13 replies)
[–] TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world 11 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (6 children)

Definitely. Looking like Henry Cavill makes it easier, but confidence is really the main attraction. I know less attractive men sleep with Victoria's Secret-type women. And there is actually a study on men who are perpetually single, and the common denominator is being under-confident. But at the same time, you don't want to be overconfident and thus arrogant.

load more comments (6 replies)
[–] Jhex@lemmy.world 33 points 4 days ago (1 children)

This is what "blind to privilege" means.... LOL

[–] Phoenicianpirate@lemm.ee 13 points 4 days ago (17 children)

I have had more than one. I am autistic with an anxiety disorder and ptsd and I had guys who aren't those things always talk to me about girls like I am super pick up master just because inam decently looking and in shape. They way they talked about their experiences made me kinda not want any, too...

And no matter how much I tried to explain my situation when asking for advice they just gave sabotaging and extremely vague advice that doesn't mean anything. I wasted away my 20s and a large part of my 30s because of shit like that.

[–] Maalus@lemmy.world 29 points 4 days ago (15 children)

The best advice is "women are people too, not some mystical being from outer space". They feel the same emotions, they get hungry, they get horny, they get anxious or shy too."

Look for people who think similarly to you. I found it that I mesh well with other people who are on the spectrum, have adhd, etc. Ultimately nothing matters when you can't approach someone, or go out of your way to find hobbies where you can find people with the same interests as you. So if you can't get over that (or accept a rejection), it won't work.

Also, don't focus on a single person, especially someone who doesn't return feelings / attention, or doesn't have time for you at all. Even the busiest person will find a tiny bit of time to meet with you if they really like you. Obsessing over a single person for years isn't the way to find love. Quoting a song by Tim Minchin, "your love is one in a million, but it doesn't mean that the other 999 999 loves wouldn't be equally nice". If you find someone who returns your feelings, you mesh with well, hold on for dear life.

load more comments (15 replies)
load more comments (16 replies)
[–] inb4_FoundTheVegan@lemmy.world 46 points 4 days ago (5 children)

Sooooo..... we're doing incel shit posting now?

This sort of black pill doomerism seriously destroys your mental health. You don't have to be a Chad to find a girlfriend friends, but thinking your not "conventionally attractive" enough to date is a self fulfilling prophecy.

[–] jsomae@lemmy.ml 22 points 4 days ago (4 children)

I just thought it was funny personally.

load more comments (4 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 55 points 4 days ago (17 children)

So I recently found out my ex wife had a type. A type she desperately wanted me to fit into. A type that she would make me go to clothing stores for specific shirts that look good on pretty much no one but Henry Cavill.

I did not look like Henry Cavill. Turns out around the time we divorce she goes through this phase swooning over Henry Cavill. Then she cheats on me with a dude I don't know the name of (except I've unfortunately seen his dick) and low and behold he has this kind Henry Cavill build.

Fast forward several years to now. I lost about 100lbs. Started lifting. Getting swole cause it was fun now that my body was smaller. Ate more protein, added creatine. Drink lots of water. I need different shirts. I dig out some old shirts, the only ones that sort of fit well are the ones she got at clothing stores that look good on pretty much no one but Henry Cavill. Turns out they still don't look good on me, not because I'm not Henry Cavill, but I'm not a fuckboy.

[–] BigDiction@lemmy.world 35 points 4 days ago (2 children)

I searched this text because I thought it might be copypasta. Great read lmao

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (16 replies)
[–] CobblerScholar@lemmy.world 58 points 5 days ago (7 children)

Just ask if she plays Warhammer bro

[–] Nefara@lemmy.world 33 points 4 days ago (20 children)

Ok so yes looking like Henry Cavill helps but how do you expect to go on a date with someone you like without asking them out? An amulet of Mara?

load more comments (20 replies)
[–] TomMasz@piefed.social 15 points 4 days ago

Let's be honest. Henry doesn't have to ask.

[–] SplashJackson@lemmy.ca 18 points 5 days ago (9 children)

I should get chin implants

load more comments (9 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›