I want Donald Trump’s neck in a guillotine. It’s psychologically important to me.
this post was submitted on 13 Jan 2026
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This is America! We hang horse thieves here.
*poor horse thieves
*black horse thieves
This is the 21st century, we solve our problems with gunpowder and lead.
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... too quick, too clean.
... too painless.
You say that, but I'm ready for all this to be over and behind us.
You're gonna be ready for a long time then.
Thats not how any of this works, pretending away a problem and just magically snapping back to "normal".
That doesn't happen in situations like this, go read a history book.
"Normal" is gone, never to return, because "normal" was built on too many lies, lies whose contradictions led us to this current moment.
This country will literally never be the same, it will be fundamentally different for generations, this Trump era is going to be a ... whole distinct defining subsection of our history, not unlike the way Nazism was/is for the history of modern Germany.
There is no pinch me and wake me up from the nightmare.
The nightmare is real, and it will take effort, conviction, and courage to try build something better.
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White House correspondent Katie Rogers — whom Trump recently called "ugly, both inside and out" for writing a story about his age — chimed in to ask, "Psychologically important to you or to the United States?"
“Psychologically important for me," Trump answered. "Now, maybe another president would feel differently, but so far I’ve been right about everything."
These were hard times for The Onion staff.
It must suck working at the onion. Real life keeps using all of your good satire ideas.
They might as well transition into the only reliable news organization in the country.
Maybe the best solution is to build a Truman show like simulated world and contain the Trump problem in there.
Rope is cheap are there are gas stations literally everywhere
I was thinking that Paradox should create a modern grand strategy simulation specifically for him, and just have everyone tell him that it's real. Could even have a fake Fox News going to report on the shit he does in the sim
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It's psychologically important to me and many others that he fucking die.
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I have a small dick and I need a big thing
"I've got a limp dick and can't fuck kids anymore, I need emotional support"
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Where are the Epstein Files?
This is the most effective distraction yet; waging war internally and threatening externally.
I'm so tired of this stupid argument. At some point his "distractions" become worse than the Trump-Epstein files. Starting WW3 is one of those things.
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We already have evidence of him being in there via failed redactions, realistically what more is going to happen if more is released?
Nothing. The thing he said about openly shooting someone in the street without meaningful consequences is getting more and more true every day.
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"we’re not going to have Russia or China as a neighbor."
Alaska has some news for ya, buddy
*gives alaska to russia*
My therapist has also recommended I consider conquering sovereign states. That or exercise.
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It's 'Psychologically Important for Me'
He's an emotionally stunted narcissistic child who needs constant reassurance so he can believe he's not a failure as a human being.
He's still a failure as a human being and history will remember him as one.
He’s also got dementia so he can’t filter himself as well, anymore. His statements are going to get crazier and crazier. He’ll say he should be in charge of the world before 2026 is over.
He’ll say he should be in charge of the world before 2026 is over.
He might start the war to make it happen.
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Sounds like something a rapist would say...
He already has an emotional support Venezuela why does he also need an emotional support Greenland too?
"National Security" is the new lebensraum
Yes by all means let’s prioritize what the child raping bubba blowing treasonous con man wants
Is this real? Because "psychologically" is a word to difficult for his vocabulary.
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Why would you deny him an emotional support invasion? It'd be like taking a stuffy away from a dog. You monster.
Finally saying out loud “feels before reals”.
Trump couldn't find it on a map a year ago. The real reason is he can't handle anyone saying no to him.
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Ah, so it's his Stalingrad. Hope that works out the same it has for other fascists and empires invading Russia
I have heard about emotional support animals, and emotional support plushies, but this is the first time I've heard about emotional support islands.
Trump is wildly familiar with emotional support islands, he used to use his friends island all the time.
Of course we all knew it, but I'm surprised he has enough self-reflection to say something like that.
Donald: Why are GenZ's having time off and can do what they want for their mental health? Why can't I take care of my mental health by taking Greenland?
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