this post was submitted on 08 Feb 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] MarieMarion@literature.cafe 62 points 2 weeks ago

When it's hot enough, the blades start melting. As metal slowly drops, they get lighter on the inner edge (thinner part, melts faster), and start rotating because they're not balanced anymore.

[–] foodandart@lemmy.zip 51 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

It aligns itself with the magnetic field of metal of the stove and starts a transduction of capicitive resonation that interferes with the polaritive vibrations of the planetary magnetic field.

This in turn creates a localized pulse of geomagnetic interference that the fan blades are sensitive to, and their shape works to create a single direction rotation that both pushes air and traps the interference and creates a perpetual motion at the same time.

Brilliant engineering, honestly.

[–] rockSlayer@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Have you considered becoming a star trek writer

[–] foodandart@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 weeks ago

LOL!

No. I'd much rather watch, than tell, stories.

[–] jrwperformance@lemmy.world 11 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Are you the inventor of the Retro Encabulator?

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 6 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

I want to know how they solve the issue with side fumbling?

[–] jrwperformance@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Side fumbling effectively prevented by 6 hydrocoptic marzlevanes.

Duh ...

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 5 points 2 weeks ago

You mean, like so?

OejtCqwNhbzI3DD.png

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[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 33 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

It doesn't work. It's an optical illusion, but is so compelling that yiu hallucinate feeling the air move.

This was first used on gas stoves, which is where the term gaslighting came from.

[–] uberfreeza@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago

It actually came from WWI, and it used to be called "gaslamping," since that's what they had used at the time.

[–] polydactyl@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Ummmm pretty sure none of that happened

Are you suggesting that someone would reply to a post in !lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world with something untrue? Ridiculous.

But you love being gaslit

[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

Wrong answers only.

[–] postmateDumbass@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Does this work for only fans?

[–] bstix@feddit.dk 28 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (3 children)

If someone posted how it actually works, it would probably get upvoted, because the real explanation is more exotic than what most people think.

The fan is connected to a small electric engine, powered by an electronic device in between the top and bottom parts. This device runs on fediverse upvotes.

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[–] KoboldCoterie@pawb.social 17 points 2 weeks ago

There's obviously a group of very small people trapped inside a hamster wheel style contraption. As the fan structure heats up, the floor of the wheel grows uncomfortably hot, and forces the little people to continuously run to avoid getting burned (continually cycling the cooler top of the wheel down to the bottom). This in turn turns the fan blades.

I am honestly appalled that you would buy such a thing; it's cruel.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

There is a tiny man inside the drum behind the fan and as it heats up, he must walk forward like on a hamster wheel to not burn his bare feet. The man walks inexorably forward, blind and delirious from exhaustion to avoid the agony of being roasted alive.

You're a sick fuck for buying this thing OP.

[–] Sv443@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 weeks ago

No don't worry, I talked to Premlak before and he really likes his job actually.

[–] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

There are little gnomes inside and when it gets hot they start hopping. That hopping powers the fan.

[–] Seaguy05@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

It's just like the brazen bull.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 12 points 2 weeks ago

It gets too hot and needs to fan itself off before it faints.

[–] YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 12 points 2 weeks ago

Boiling water.

[–] probablymissing@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

the heat actually vibrates the blades of the fans at a special frequency that allows it to communicate with the undead.

using a special set of mircoscopic engravings on the back of every odd numbered blade, it communicates with the vengeful spirits and asks for a man named 'josh'.

once the fan hits 100°c, and josh is successfully conjured, he utilizes his insanely strong arms to push the fan in a counter-clockwise direction.

upon the cooling of the fan, josh relieved of his duties, and sent to the break room. another spirit is premoted to a 'josh' to take his place.

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[–] pturn1@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Thoughts & Prayers ^TM^

[–] Ironfacebuster@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

The fan has a small gnome creature permanently jailed for his crimes between the bottom foot and top fan. When you heat the bottom he bounces around Mario 64 style and rotates a small crank attached via string. This motion generates enough energy to spin the fan at like 3 rpm. The gnome cannot be released under any circumstances.

[–] PodPerson@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 weeks ago

The 5G sends theta control waves to humanoid brains and the closest human to the fan reflects some of those control waves onto the collecting fins on the body of the fan, thereby resonating and making the fan blades spin.

Obviously.

[–] SuDmit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 2 weeks ago

It detects when you are in heat, and turns on.

[–] taiyang@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

Quite simply, as it says, when things get heated, such as during a fight with your spouse, the fan will start trying to escape which causes it to spin.

This also works if you start yelling at it yourself, although you need to be genuine. It can detect if you're lying, so get angry!

[–] Suburbanl3g3nd@lemmings.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

You rig it to a boiling pot of water and the fan creates electricity from the boiling water to power the fan

[–] hedge_lord@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

The earth is spinning like really quickly all the time and we just don't notice it. Heat if a form of vibration, and so when heat is applied to the bottom of the fan the atoms there move more. A gyroscope resists tilting forces because it is spinning, and the earth is spinning, but the vibration of the fan decouples it from this effect. The blades are able to move freely and the earth moves around them, pushing air through the blades.

tldr: It's not spinning, you are spinning

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[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 weeks ago

Wind turbine for Jesus farts.

[–] MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

Ghost blowing on it like a pinwheel.

[–] kalpol@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 weeks ago

HEAT not included

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 5 points 2 weeks ago (6 children)

Why is the gauge missing rpm?

And when will this tech evolve for human body heat?
(I want to fly using by buttplug!)

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

They already tried that, but the power exchange of heat to motion dangerously interacts with conceptual hotness and you just had kinky human icicles falling from the sky.

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[–] Rooster326@programming.dev 3 points 2 weeks ago

Because hotter oven go brrrr

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[–] GreenCrunch@piefed.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 weeks ago

When air is warm, it rises. As the air attaches to the blades, the air is tricked into accepting a new definition of "up" which rotates with the blades, endlessly propelling them.

As that air cools, warmer air is drawn in and entrapped, continuing the cycle.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 4 points 2 weeks ago

Steam powered.

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 weeks ago

This object is stationary. It's base is full of LSD, Magic Mushroom and a choice, proprietary cocktail.

Eat the drugs and you spin, while the fan just watches you and silently approves.

[–] axexrx@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

It gets hot, then it blows you- what else is there to know?

[–] atomp@piefed.zip 4 points 2 weeks ago
[–] rook@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 weeks ago

Connects to Tesla's wireless electricity tower ofc

[–] Hond@piefed.social 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

It converts the vibrations from me shagging your mom in the kitchen.

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Are you free tomorrow at five? I want to bake a cake.

[–] atropa@piefed.social 3 points 2 weeks ago

Its a worp engine

[–] OldGrayDog@lemmynsfw.com 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Heat power like the box says, duh!

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[–] darkevilmac@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 weeks ago

There's a little guy in the hub and as it gets hotter he begins running trying to escape which creates rotational energy to spin the blade

[–] LostGhost@piefed.social 3 points 2 weeks ago

Straight up magic

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