I was betting on Florida Man as the culprit from just the headline, but the linguistic content made it obvious that this was a deeply Australian man
Not The Onion
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
Potato potahto
Finally, the goddamned zombie apocalypse
Can't have that normal timeline returning
...the strange virus that began on a cruise ship has now spread...
... Man bit the flight attendant...
We're in the zombie movie exposition News reel scene
Maybe it's a good time for me to move to the country side
My wife thought we were "in the country" when she moved in.
I can see a hospital from my front door.
If shit hit the fan, we are definitely not "in the country" enough to not have to worry about it immediately.
Heck, if it's zombies, we will be dealing with them before they take over the world, since they'd be wandering away from hospitals in search of flesh.
If it's bombs, we live too close to secondary and tertiary targets to be unaffected, especially if there are storms blowing fallout up to us.
I guess there isn't much point to my comment beyond "make sure you go really far out to where you can't see city glows on the horizon at night."
The nearest gas station to me closed so it's about 20 mins if I want to spend money somewhere. There are more maintained snowmobile trails here than maintained roads.
‘straya, mate
I said peanuts! Not penis! Oh its your finger! I'm so sorry! So very very sorry! Really. I.
I got no words! I would never.
I didn't know it was your finger, I thought it was peanuts. I just went all badger in the imaginary peanut bag and I'm sorry!! Please forgive me!
The safety of our customers and our crew is our number one priority and we have zero tolerance for.....
- The Illegal Sacking and Outsourcing of Ground Staff
- Executive Windfalls vs. Worker Stagnation
- "Labor Hire" and Wage-Cutting Loopholes
- Heavy-Handed Industrial Relations Tactics
- Staffing Deficits and Mental Health Toll
Lying fucking cunts. They are more dangerous than any passenger
Goddamn aussies man
Almost man bites dog story.
I'd rather bite a flight attendant than a dog.