Ask Lemmy

I have to do it anyway and if i have to do it tommorow, i'm stressed till then, so better do it now, so i have free time tommorow.

Convince yourself you will be skinned alive if you do not do them

Start small and incrementally increase

Yell: "Shut the fuck up and just do it, you whiny little shit. Your opinion ain't worth fuck all", really loudly.

That usually gets me started and once started, the task is less daunting.

Find a way to make it easier to do. I wanted to eat healthier, I started ordering meal kits so I can cook healthy meals more easily. I wanted to exercise more, I bought an exercise bike and use it while watching TV and movies

Basically a three step process.

1.) Ingest caffeine.

2.) Put on Highway Star by Deep Purple. Big headphones to drown out distractions.

3.) Take a couple breaths to focus, then buckle in for the ride

Don’t focus on the task, focus on step one in accomplishing the task and do that as it’s probably small

E.g

put on my running shoes and clothes instead of thinking of going for a run

Log on to the server instead of debugging the application logs

Pick up the weight instead of doing 3 sets

Focusing on the small first step instead of the daunting big task makes it easier to get started

This is called being an adult.

You grow up. That's what you do. You realize your actions have consequences and you decide you don't want to face the negative consequences of bad habits.

I don't. I tell my wife that I'll do X by this day. Once there's a deadline involved, even if it's the last minute, I will do it to avoid disappointing my wife.

Cleaning only works when I start the moment I get home from work. Otherwise I'm too spent to do anything meaningful.

ADHD medication

Be kind to your future self. You know them better than anyone, and you know they work hard enough already. Do them a favor every once in a while and see how good it feels to help them out.

Stop self-talking, that's the basis of so much anxiety and all dread, which is always worse than just doing the thing, more suffering by trying to avoid the original suffering. Stupid brain.

Let your body get up and go do the thing without your mind fucking it up. It's called "behavioral activation" and it even works.

You start before the brain finds out what's going on, or depending on your perspective, you start before the rest of the body realises what is happening.

You don't talk, you don't think, you don't plan. Only do.

Hard as fuck to get there, at least for me, but it works great.

Dumb as hell but I tell myself "nothin' to it but to do it", and then I do the thing. Like ripping it off like a bandaid.

I don't. "Good for you" isn't good enough for doing something I don't want to do. It has to be absolutely necessary.

Once you figure it out, report back

I will often incentivize myself. Give myself a little treat afterward.

Sometimes it’s the other way around. Sometimes I’ll let myself have a treat in exchange for doing something I don’t really wanna do, like a chore I’ve been putting off.

Most of the time the activity doesn't actually take much time. The older I get, the faster time seems to pass and I have awareness of this fast-time-passing. So instead of avoiding the thing for hours, I just do it instead and am actually fully done with the activity in usually less than an hour. After that you can pat yourself on the back saying that you're an adult and you took care of an adult responsibility, but truly you are self-aware enough to know you were one tiny breath away from skipping it to do something time-wasting or irresponsible instead. For one more day you get to live the illusion you're and adult and you can take care of your adult responsibilities.

If you do this more often than not, you actually are an adult and actually do take care of your adult responsibilities on regular basis.

I dont - I need to be pushed. My wife is really supportive and great for that. For health, just visiting a doctor is enough to scare me straight

You mean like cutting down on pancake consumption?

I tell myself that nothing will get done or be achieved if I don't start

I don't necessarily recommend you use my method. I use a lot of negative self talk until I'm doing the thing (working out, work on rough days, farm chores on tough days, meal prepping healthy stuff etcetera). It's probably not the most healthy but it usually works. It also creeps in any time I make a mistake, which is likely not great..

For my part, I did the good things for a year and felt really really good. Then I stopped doing them during COVID and felt really really bad.

It's much easier now to do the good thing because I know what's at the end of the tunnel.

Maybe not the healthiest, but just being stern with myself. Inner shame or consequences of not doing it are good motivators for me.

I pay into the Finch App and I gamify my habits. They claim to respect privacy via their paid customers like me but either way, it helped me gamify good habits.