this post was submitted on 31 May 2026
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[–] ironycanal@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

So there's no reason not to kiss, then?

[–] kivihiili@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 20 hours ago

YURI! YURI! YURI!!!!

[–] MithranArkanere@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago (3 children)

There is no hell in the bible, tho.

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Yes there is: reading the damn thing! Pun intended.

[–] GladiusB@lemmy.world 5 points 23 hours ago

You mean to tell me that hell is just Fanfic?

[–] Repelle@lemmy.world 1 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Are you just talking about the Old Testament? Cuz yeah it’s not there, but revelations has the whole lake of fire bit and there’s eternal punishment in the gospels

[–] MithranArkanere@lemmy.world 0 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Any mentions of "hell" are mistranslations of something that actually meant "the grave".
For example, some texts claiming Jesus talking about "Gehenna" got translated into "Hades", and that into "Hell" sometimes, but that Jesus was actually talking about the Valley of Hinnom, the garbage dump of Jerusalem. Where they sometimes burned trash (although some exaggerate, saying it was a constant fire, which it wasn't). So basically, "your corpse doesn't go into the cemetery to wait for resurrection, it gets sent to the garbage dump and burns there".

[–] Repelle@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago

If your argument is that the word isn’t never used then sure, I’ll concede that, but the relevant concepts of eternal punishment and burning are very much there as I pointed out.

[–] Zetta@mander.xyz 2 points 1 day ago

The Outer Darkness!!!

[–] axh@lemmy.world 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"Look, it says right here, that I should be stoned! I will get stoned this evening"

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 1 day ago

🎶🎵 Everybody must get stoned! 🎵🎶

[–] 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I try not to kink shame, but yeah 🤷🏻

[–] YerLam@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

"I've got a chapter full of sins and a whole night of fun planned."

[–] IAmYouButYouDontKnowYet@reddthat.com 40 points 2 days ago (2 children)

We're already there! ♥️

[–] BloodMuffin@lemmy.ca 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

All I see are slaves.

[–] uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

During the 20th century, atheism wasn't really a thing except for a few scientists and STEM thinkers. (There was the irreligious, but openly admitting you didn't go to church or care much was frowned upon). All the different Christian institutions diametrically opposed each other, even more than they opposed Islam or Hinduism. Jews were tolerated but disregarded as doing their own thing. And they were going to Hell anyway.

(Oh and there was the Church of Religious Science, which was essentially church for atheists and people who didn't take church seriously. There were also liberal Christian faiths like the Unitarians and the Universalists, who eventually combined into one organization. Most people who might have been liberal Christians these days are instead atheist, agnostic or irreligious. Liberal Christianity still exists but it has a tiny following.)

All the mainline and fundamentalist churches believed as the Roman Catholic Church did, extra Ecclesiam nulla salus. No salvation outside [this] church. Seriously, the Presbyterians thought the Lutherans were going to Hell. The Lutherans thought the Pentacostals were going to Hell. The Pentacostals thought the Baptists were going to Hell and vice versa all around.

Then came 9/11 and, inspired by that event, Richard Dawkins and company founded the New Atheism movement, and so in the aughts, the religious ministries had two new enemies, Islam (mostly radical militant Islam, but the churches didn't distinguish) and rapidly-multiplying atheists, eager to meet their religious brethren on the debate stage.

And suddenly, all the churches were much more tolerant of each other, at least when facing the public. Then there was only one faith: Christianity.

Within their own chambers they still felt the other denominations were deliberate deceptions of Satan, and destined to hellfire, but faith leaders speaking to the public would presume that when they preached (whether condemning Muslims or gays or women or secular society) they spoke for all of Christendom.

And now that's a problem for every denomination that isn't white Evangelical Christian nationalism (which is bleeding out of the US into the rest of the world), since all the more beatitude-minded faiths -- including some evangelists -- don't want to be represented to the rest of the world by Paula White-Cain and Franklin Graham and Robert Jeffress, or for that matter, Jesus Donald Trump.

In fact, Christian scholars are terrified that the current Christian nationalist movement (which actually extends into other denominations, including the Catholicism of all six of the conservative SCOTUS jurists) may end Christianity's reign as a major world religion.

Still, if the ministries were successfully able to chase atheists back into the closet, and non-Christians out of the US borders, they'd just turn on each other much the way Protestants and Catholics warred on each other bloodily across Europe.

[–] Hiro8811@lemmy.world 1 points 22 hours ago

Also some authors and poets were a atheists, some as big as Dante.

[–] DonutsRMeh@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago

I can never understand believing in religion.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Become an atheist so you don't go to hell!

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Become a satanist so when you get there, you're mates with the boss and get a cushy job.

[–] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 day ago

God damn it, Kage!
He's gonna make you his sex slave.
You're gonna gargle mayonnaise,
unless we bust a massive monster mamajam...

[–] Rhaedas@fedia.io 11 points 2 days ago

The dice have been loaded the whole time!

[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

First one there gets drinks!

(The drinks are boiling acid. It is hell, after all. But on the plus side, they have cute little umbrellas in them ... as long as you drink it before the umbrella dissolves.)

[–] SomeoneSomewhere@lemmy.nz 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If the umbrella dissolves, it's still in the drink. Just a different kind of 'in'.

[–] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 day ago

Finally! I can finally drink my little umbrellas.

[–] ButtermilkBiscuit@feddit.nl 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

***Mormons have entered the chat

[–] scutiger@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

JW also, all the open spots for heaven have already been assigned. Everyone's going to hell.

[–] mech@feddit.org 5 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I love the idea that God wants to welcome someone to heaven, they deserve it, they've been a good person all their lives, but...
Whoops, sorry, we're overbooked. Looks like it's eternal damnation for you, what a bummer!

[–] Entropy_Pyre@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I heard the JW’s had to hotpatch their lore. Now they just say that there are 144k leaders/elite who will be in charge of the others who get saved. The church membership got too big and the tithing, I’m guessing, was too nice to tell people they’re outta luck.

[–] mech@feddit.org 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Not their first version update with breaking changes.
Originally they claimed WW1 was the biblical end of the world.

[–] kent_eh@lemmy.ca 3 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

They've claimed to know when the end of the world is coming multiple times.

And after each date came and went uneventfully, they have become increasingly quiet about those predictions.

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 day ago

In retrospect, letting us reproduce past 144,000 individuals was probably not the best idea