this post was submitted on 02 Jun 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to !shitreactionariessay@lemmygrad.ml

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

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[–] flan@hexbear.net 64 points 1 year ago (1 children)

reactionaries are like an absurdist sketch comedy. It doesn't even matter what changes but as long as it changes they will get mad about it.

They're like little tiny babies who get scared and shid and barfe because daddy shaved his mustache off.

[–] LeZero@hexbear.net 56 points 1 year ago (5 children)

That English breakfast looks horrible

[–] Daeraxa@lemmy.ml 48 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Its an awful representation, sausages have been incinerated and the bacon looks like it has been left under a warmer for a few hours.

[–] FloridaBoi@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago

Even by English standards that looks so bad

[–] MolotovHalfEmpty@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Even the mushrooms somehow look greasy and dry. Shit attempt.

[–] ProfessorOwl_PhD@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago

Honestly, seems pretty standard for someone who's proud enough of their full english to post it on social media. They're always some of the most disgusting plates of food you've ever seen.

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[–] polskilumalo@lemmygrad.ml 36 points 1 year ago

straight up looks like coal

[–] o_d@lemmygrad.ml 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I was thinking the same. That's literally heartburn on a plate.

[–] idkmybffjoeysteel@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] o_d@lemmygrad.ml 12 points 1 year ago

The lousy attempt at "breakfast" or the heartburn?

[–] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

I'm a highly educated expert in Breakfastology and that traditional English breakfast is racist.

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[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 55 points 1 year ago (1 children)

it's truly remarkable how stupid everything has become

[–] axont@hexbear.net 31 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

It was already stupid. 20 years ago they were complaining that Pokemon was a brainwashing plot. 50 years ago they were complaining about Beatles albums having backwards satanic messages. 100 years ago they were complaining about women riding bicycles. They were never intellectually serious at any point.

[–] M68040@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago

At one point Jazz presaged decadance and the corruption of the white man or whatever

[–] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 53 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's so embarrassing seeing the Americanization of the rest of the anglosphere.

In the 2000s I remember Amerikkka (rightfully so) being the laughingstock of the entire western world for being too CHUDDy, even for the west. Now it seems like everyone is in a bare-knuckled fight on who can be crowned the asshole nation of the world.

[–] hello_hello@hexbear.net 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

At least we will never have to hear about "nordic style socialism" in the future when austerity completes its Europe continental tour.

Shit was annoying.

[–] WaterBowlSlime@lemmygrad.ml 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

When that happens, we're gonna hear about how "socialism always fails" instead.

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

We already do, so I see no difference.

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 52 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It is woke and leftist to eat a fully balanced and healthy diet with a wide variety of foods.

[–] fox@hexbear.net 29 points 1 year ago

Nah you gotta shit yourself constantly, turn bright red, and die of heart failure in your fifties, that's the King's way

[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 46 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Not just the Anglosphere, the entire "garden" has gone mad. In my country one of the libertarian party's top candidates for the EU elections is running a campaign based on paper straws being bad. The far right has politicised the consumption of pork as a kind of islamophobic "praxis" and a while back a big culture war issue here was whether or not preschools should be mandated to serve pork to children.

PS: It is cute that the chuds think school food programmes are so well-funded that they can afford woke food like sushi or quinoa.

[–] WhatDoYouMeanPodcast@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I had a paper straw recently and it was fine lmao

these snowflakes became the very thing they sought to destroy

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[–] M68040@hexbear.net 38 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Ian't acting like sushi is some sort of cosmopolitan foreign devil food a really '80s/'90s thing?

[–] Tommasi@hexbear.net 34 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Do they think the parents of most elementary school kids are like 75 years old?

[–] Robert_Kennedy_Jr@hexbear.net 31 points 1 year ago

It's New Zealand so they're essentially still in the 90s.

[–] iArtemis@hexbear.net 31 points 1 year ago (1 children)

how does someone whining about a paper lid even make the news i feel so bad for journalists sometimes

[–] Robert_Kennedy_Jr@hexbear.net 33 points 1 year ago (2 children)

There was a NY Post article a couple weeks ago about a Zionist who claimed to be addicted to cheese and lost 50lbs with Ozempic.

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

For a second there I thought you were going to say that the zionist thinks paper lids are now Khamas

[–] M68040@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago

Oh yeah, that came up on Minion Death Cult i think

[–] NoamParenti@hexbear.net 30 points 1 year ago

CW because Bri*ish, too

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 30 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

The right wing melting down over woke food and gamers melting down over video game shrinking booba are two sides of the same "freaking out over treats" coin that unify the right wing.

[–] nothx@hexbear.net 28 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The only way an English breakfast would become woke is if they ate it prior to letting their dog eat it and shit it onto their plate. Seriously, if food is a universal language, then English breakfast is a slur.

[–] idkmybffjoeysteel@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)
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[–] polskilumalo@lemmygrad.ml 27 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I've had "full English breakfast" once. I've nearly puked.

I'd rather have the fucking woke food of "quinoa and sushi" than British """"food"""". And if I were a parent in those countries I'd just pack my kid with woke food.

[–] Blottergrass@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Sad to say but I don't think there will be an anti-reactionary correction to this in time. I think this is the last wimper of "civilization" until the soil really does stop producing nutritionally dense crops.

[–] TheGyattsMustBeCrazy@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

how do you think it will play out from here on out?

[–] Blottergrass@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

not well and i dont have any answers and I don't think i'll fare better than anyone else, if anything i'll be low resilience. There just seems to be a deeply low political will for those not already initiated. No Bernie successor and primitive accumulation of TPTB is accelerating exponentially. To sad to parse just sad enough to scream about it. Pathetic, I know I'm sorry. May god be real and be on our side. I live in Florida, man, I have nothing to actually offer.

Damn, to be fair the DeSantis campaign proved that there is no appetite for reflexive culture war bullshit outside of a small base.

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[–] Assian_Candor@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago

Murdoch empire

[–] FloridaBoi@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago

I was in Savannah a few months ago and as I was walking through a square, a boomer woman behind me says to her friend “thank god they don’t charge extra for PLASTIC bags! I love Georgia because they have FULL QUALITY plastic bags!”

[–] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago

I remember when a Time Hortons removed tipping to spite a minimum wage increase in Canada.

[–] GenderIsOpSec@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago

They made a video game about this, i think thinking-about-it something about tadpoles

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago

Death to the Anglosphere

[–] alexandra_kollontai@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's the worst full english breakfast I've seen in my life

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