Hey Congress. This is your cue to do nothing again.
this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2026
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"Yeah, check's in the mail, buddy. It'll be there any day now."
Can we citizens arrest this constitution violating, child murdering, child raping, embezzling, racketeering, emoluments clause breaking, treasonous, insurrectionist, yet?
Hey AP, who's gonna pay those tarriffs, huh? Y’know it seems like you just ran that story a few days ago but now I guess you already forgot about it huh.
The tariffs are basically the "consumption tax" that was popular in "libertarian" circles decades (or longer) ago. I remember a buddy of mine going down that path circa 2004 "income tax doesn't work, we should have a consumption tax aka universal sales tax instead".
On the other hand, this strikes me as yet another scheme to try and cover up the prior scheme. Basically, he thinks/realizes that he might have to pay back the money from the prior/current scheme, so he's hatched a new one to try and collect enough money to at least break even.
We'll see how it goes.
It is kind of ironic that the ruling came in nearly at the same time that we see that Dummkopf stupid trade war did almost zilch in regards to trade deficits, something which he is apparently obsessed with.
And what does Dummkopf do? Doubles down. The moron had a chance to shake his fist at the "woke courts" or whatever the fuck and back off and people might breathe a sigh of relief at the idea they might get a reprieve from this nonsense. Instead, Grandpa Klanrobe is doubling down....Friday he was screaming 10%, Saturday it's 15%.
He is just so fucking stupid.
Libertarian police
I was shooting heroin and reading “The Fountainhead” in the front seat of my privately owned police cruiser when a call came in. I put a quarter in the radio to activate it. It was the chief.
“Bad news, detective. We got a situation.”
“What? Is the mayor trying to ban trans fats again?”
“Worse. Somebody just stole four hundred and forty-seven million dollars’ worth of bitcoins.”
The heroin needle practically fell out of my arm. “What kind of monster would do something like that? Bitcoins are the ultimate currency: virtual, anonymous, stateless. They represent true economic freedom, not subject to arbitrary manipulation by any government. Do we have any leads?”
“Not yet. But mark my words: we’re going to figure out who did this and we’re going to take them down … provided someone pays us a fair market rate to do so.”
“Easy, chief,” I said. “Any rate the market offers is, by definition, fair.”
He laughed. “That’s why you’re the best I got, Lisowski. Now you get out there and find those bitcoins.”
“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m on it.”
I put a quarter in the siren. Ten minutes later, I was on the scene. It was a normal office building, strangled on all sides by public sidewalks. I hopped over them and went inside.
“Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®” I said, flashing my badge and my gun and a small picture of Ron Paul. “Nobody move unless you want to!” They didn’t.
“Now, which one of you punks is going to pay me to investigate this crime?” No one spoke up.
“Come on,” I said. “Don’t you all understand that the protection of private property is the foundation of all personal liberty?”
It didn’t seem like they did.
“Seriously, guys. Without a strong economic motivator, I’m just going to stand here and not solve this case. Cash is fine, but I prefer being paid in gold bullion or autographed Penn Jillette posters.”
Nothing. These people were stonewalling me. It almost seemed like they didn’t care that a fortune in computer money invented to buy drugs was missing.
I figured I could wait them out. I lit several cigarettes indoors. A pregnant lady coughed, and I told her that secondhand smoke is a myth. Just then, a man in glasses made a break for it.
“Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®” I yelled.
Too late. He was already out the front door. I went after him.
“Stop right there!” I yelled as I ran. He was faster than me because I always try to avoid stepping on public sidewalks. Our country needs a private-sidewalk voucher system, but, thanks to the incestuous interplay between our corrupt federal government and the public-sidewalk lobby, it will never happen.
I was losing him. “Listen, I’ll pay you to stop!” I yelled. “What would you consider an appropriate price point for stopping? I’ll offer you a thirteenth of an ounce of gold and a gently worn ‘Bob Barr ‘08’ extra-large long-sleeved men’s T-shirt!”
He turned. In his hand was a revolver that the Constitution said he had every right to own. He fired at me and missed. I pulled my own gun, put a quarter in it, and fired back. The bullet lodged in a U.S.P.S. mailbox less than a foot from his head. I shot the mailbox again, on purpose.
“All right, all right!” the man yelled, throwing down his weapon. “I give up, cop! I confess: I took the bitcoins.”
“Why’d you do it?” I asked, as I slapped a pair of Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs® on the guy.
“Because I was afraid.”
“Afraid?”
“Afraid of an economic future free from the pernicious meddling of central bankers,” he said. “I’m a central banker.”
I wanted to coldcock the guy. Years ago, a central banker killed my partner. Instead, I shook my head.
“Let this be a message to all your central-banker friends out on the street,” I said. “No matter how many bitcoins you steal, you’ll never take away the dream of an open society based on the principles of personal and economic freedom.”
He nodded, because he knew I was right. Then he swiped his credit card to pay me.
I love this. Did you write this? I'm thinking of trying to get a LLM to kick out an entire book in this style. :)
Thank you for this. Never read that one before, gave me a few good chuckles at the office.
Great. Let’s boycott all US companies. No more McDonald’s, Burger King, Google, Meta, Microslop, Heinz ketchup, etc etc.
Just, no more
As an American, i support this plan.
Thank you for your service 🫡
Same; same
No more McDonald’s, Burger King
If I wanted to spend $40 - $50 on lunch for two I would go to a regular diner that makes fresh food. Are we boycotting or just... surviving?
Porque no los dos?
The trouble is, I'm sure a bunch of us here on lemmy already do that.
To have an impact you need people who buy this shit every day to stop, indefinitely.
Of course you’re right, I’m one of those. But gotta start somewhere, and by doing and telling we spread the word
What's going on with this photo?
Did Trump's hairstylist quit? When the fuck did the died blonde hair turn grey??
Dye is rough on the hair long term and he's been at it for decades. It's possible he's reached the point where they just couldn't anymore because the hair is too damaged and wouldn't survive another go round.
Also long term blood thinner use causes hair thinning and texture changes and can affect how dyes work in and of itself.
The presidency is known to age any normal person at quadruple speed. Trump is not a normal person.
Why does everybody just comply with this doof
The right people are making money.
Because anyone noncompliant gets fired or otherwise forced out.
Someone needs to put Grumpy Grampa in a home.
Or in the ground, I'm not picky either one is good.
In a perfect world Vance would die from a freak couch accident, and Trump after being told his favorite sentient anal polyp was dead would be so shocked he'd have a massive instantly fatal heart attack.
he’s already in the White Home dude
🙄
Don the John working his astronomical-dimensional brilliance ONCE AGAIN!!!