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And that’s basically it!
Well, yes, I personally have never seen a male giraffe mate with another male giraffe. I've never seen a male and a female giraffe mate, either. In fact I've never seen a giraffe in the wild at all.
So I'm gonna take this one step further and say giraffes don't exist in the wild. Every giraffe that exists lives in zoos because that's the only place I, personally, have ever seen them. Any evidence to the contrary is fake news.
Am I Republicaning correctly?
You are absolutely right!
Close. You have to make a bold claim that combines those 2 unrelated topics. Something like....."The fact that I have only seen gay giraffes exist while in captivity proves that being gay is unnatural. I'm 100% positive every giraffe outside of Zoos are banging the Lord's way."
I have never personally witnessed two Floridians having sex. Therefore we can conclude that Floridians don't procreate and thus Florida can only sustain its population by illegally importing hordes of immigrants. The American federal government should arrest the entire Floridian government to put an end to this.
Aren't giraffes known for being the most gay out of almost all animal species? Or am I thinking of another animal?
They are, yes.
This is like saying Liberace proves gay people are all actually straight.
I was going to say, who knew giraffe scientists were this far into mapping the human genome, but then I read he was a Republican, so it’s obviously some tall tale
South Florida
Yeah.
That dude definitely wants to fuck a giraffe.
Meanwhile, Grindr profile views and hookups peak every time there's a Republican held convention.
It’s only gay if the balls touch your chin.
It doesn't count if it's just the tip!
I love how all these conservatives have medical degrees and specialties. I had no idea that we had so many doctors in the US. Where is our free healthcare if we have such a surplus of 'expert' medical professionals???
Quite a lot of them are chiropractors, osteopaths and other para-medical "degree" holders. Not to mention the ones who have real medical degrees, but are certified by dodgy boards that they set up themselves, like Rand Paul.
I mean I would argue that you cannot born gay but you can born to be gay.
Giraffes are famous for engaging in extensive same-sex behavior. Studies have documented that up to 94% of observed mating-like activity happens between males, often involving intense caressing, "necking" (rubbing necks), and mounting
The giraffes are keeping all of the gay to themselves so humans can’t have any
Of course they’re necking.
If our giraffes don’t mate, how do they be like they do when they are?
“You never see a giraffe, a male giraffe, that mate(s) with a giraffe,” Rod Joseph said.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexual_behavior_in_animals
Giraffes
Further information: Giraffe § Necking
Male giraffes have been observed to engage in remarkably high frequencies of homosexual behavior. After aggressive "necking", it is common for two male giraffes to caress and court each other, leading up to mounting and climax. Such interactions between males have been found to be more frequent than heterosexual coupling.[95]
This is why they want to dismantle Wikipedia, by the way.
I would imagine most giraffes, male or otherwise, mate with giraffes.
Allegedly.
Except with the occasional sick ostrich.
Unless they get raped by Republican politicians.
I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt here as to meaning, as the second part of his statement is even more incoherent if not, given context. I'm assuming that he just misspoke.
“Myself right now saying, ‘I am a giraffe,’ that doesn’t mean it’s true.”
I don't see as how his giraffe-ness would have much bearing on homosexuality, otherwise.
He's making an aside to denigrate otherkin because he doesn't know the difference between gay people and otherkin. After all, we're both queer.
"Oh, no. Facts!" Rod Joseph shrieked in horror.
So what Joseph is basically doing is coming out of the closet saying “I’m straight as a giraffe.”
Kinda cute.
I wonder where he got the giraffes example from. It feels to like it was chosen on purpose. Uneducated people won't fact check it and the fact checkers cause social media engagement.
Probably just the first animal he thought of that he didn't see homosexual behavior of in videos before, seeing how common it is in documentaries about most felines or apes. It happens so much that it's difficult for the cameramen not to film. 😅
Lions, Giraffes, Bonobos and Tigers, oh my!
Shouldn't there be some law or something to remove people in office who blatantly lie like this? Surely someone with this kind of attitude could not uphold democracy. They are a threat to national security.
In other news, unicorns are straight
They still give me the horn.
land of the free... you are free to think and be exactly as those morons want you to think and be
“You cannot be born gay. That’s impossible biologically,” he added, stating his sureness that sexuality is a preference, not a biological orientation.
In my limited experience, I have read plenty of anecdotes where someone has this point of view, only to later realise that they’re bisexual.
It's just like those homophobes that talk about how hard it is not to be gay. "Something something constant temptation to have sex with men" and all that. I can say with absolute certainty that I've never experienced that temptation. I think you might just be attracted to men my guy.
Even if it were true that people aren't queer by birth, that should make no difference to their rights.
My very fundamentalist first boss and I agreed strongly on this, although with opposite conclusions.
My feeling was whatever one or more consenting adults want to do in private is fine.
His feeling was if God tells you not to do something that you shouldn't do it, even if you really want to, even if you were born wanting to.
I'd be willing to take a large bet that this guy has a Grindr profile.
BREAKING: U.S. Rep. Andy Ogles (R-TN) caught in public restroom having sex with another man
~~another man~~ male giraffe
Wanna be mad? If you wanna be accurate, it's most likely a human child that was kidnapped and enslaved.
How much animal porn is this guy watching that he thinks he's an expert on animal mating habits?
I mean, this is so on the nose, it has to be on purpose.