Get a service industry job to learn a healthy sense of misanthropy
I don't recommend it, but it can definitely give you a perspective of the kind of shit people have to put up with
Learn how to be happy alone. Simple!
Really though, if you figure this out, a lot of other things click into place. I used to think it was impossible. Just words miserable people said to make themselves feel less lonely.
Okay, sometimes it's still that, but I've come to enjoy being able to focus on whatever I want to focus on without the distractions, drama, and/or gnawing desperation.
Honestly go out and figure out your sexual preferences by exploring and experimenting. I find this happens a lot. A young couple get together in early twenties. Then they slowly drift apart because y'all honestly didn't make a solid decision on who to settle down with. It causes so much pain, heartbreak and financial stress.
Just be honest. Hit the apps and let everyone know what you're doing. Just meet people. If they are weird no big deal meet the next person. And you will probably fall in love but you have to be strong and make sure to only give that heart out to the one you know will take care of it.
When you get that feeling about a person but you know they aren't the one identify why you like them. You will probably form a pretty solid idea of your preferences this way. At least I did.
Put money aside for the future.
Protect your hearing. Listen to loud music in moderation and use earplugs in loud environments.
Most practical advice I've seen in this thread. For anyone who wants to protect their hearing at a concert without making the music sound muffled, check out these flat frequency ear plugs:
https://www.etymotic.com/product/etyplugs-high-fidelity-earplugs/
Vote.
I'd also add participate in local politics. There's no law saying a 20 year old can't be any elected official but president.
There is, it's the constitution. You can't be a member of the House without being 25 or a senator without being 30.
Wear. Sunscreen.
If you absolutely hate sunscreen for sensory reasons, check out UPF jackets and other clothing. I live in a place where the UV is 11+ every day in the summer and it works great without being suffocatingly hot. Being able to just throw a jacket on and go outside without worrying about sunburn is pretty great.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life.
The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives,
some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.
Floss and make regular dentist visits, prioritize fitness and make it a habit for the rest of your life, and don't allow negative people in your life
20 years ago I would have said invest regularly in an index fund.
Today I think you should learn all you can about DIY water filtration and growing edible mushrooms in caves.
Have to invest points in radiation resistance.
Learn to cook!
It’s great fun if you can get into it, it fulfills one of your basic needs in a much more fun and satisfying way, and it can be a good and attractive quality in a future partner and / or fun to do with them.
Live alone and single at some point in your life.
It's shocking how many people never learn to just be themselves, by themselves. And I don't mean for a month or two. Get to know yourself before you settle in together with somebody else.
In THIS economy?!
That's a good point. We're going to have a lot of really stunted people who never got the chance to live alone and learn about themselves because nobody can afford rent anymore.
Enjoy nature before it gets clearcut for money
Save up an emergency fund. If you can manage to keep six months to a year's worth of expenses in a savings account, it will give you a huge psychological cushion in rough times. Beyond that, save and invest as early as you can.
Learn how to do basic maintenance on a bicycle, car, motorcycle or whatever else in your life that you depend on. That knowledge and experience will pay dividends the rest of your life.
Master your inner dialogue and emotions.
Practice speaking positively and rationally to yourself. Use affirmations, mantras, or visualisations for confidence, for forgiveness of yourself and others, relaxation, motivation.
If you ever feel like crying, it is important to cry hard and deep, and then it's important to recover after with some kind of happy celebration, whether it's playing or a treat, just something nice to help your body learn to get happy after being sad, angry, or scared.
Stop reaching for distractions when powerful emotions come on. Face the emotion. Study it with curiosity. Feel it fully. And comfort yourself positively until it passes.
Start down this road now. You don't want to end up 40, done with school, done with your parents, done with your first couple of real jobs, and have no idea how to control yourself throughout the day.
Forgive yourself and others but learn from those experiences. As a saying goes "Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”
This is really valuable advise. I'm 20 at this point, and (after therapy) I'm looking back and realizing now much self-acceptance and connection with your own emotion shape the way I perceive the world. I'm really glad that I started this young, and for people who live in a country where psychotherapy is covered by healthcare - there are usually offers of a short psychotherapy (in Germany it's called Kurzzeitherapie, short-term therapy) which will in my opinion as a psychology student will benefit every person.
Travel on the cheap while you're still willing to put up with it.
Seriously. Save up a couple thousand dollars. Go see stuff.
Make sure you have enough in your emergency fund to get home if you screw it up.
Learn a paid skill you can do with your hands. Welding, painting, HVAC, long-line fishing, building PC’s, anything. Get proficient.
You may never use it again. Hopefully you develop a skill-set that pays you better/is less physically demanding/is sexier.
But you will never starve and may be able to feed your family even if your primary occupation falls out of favor.
-- Acquire new skills that will pay off in the long run.
-- Build habits like exercising, eating well, and prioritizing mental health which can set you up for lifelong well-being.
-- Build deep friendships, relationships, and connections. It’s the decade where many lifelong bonds are formed.
-- Learn about budgeting, saving, investing, and managing credit. Financial literacy will greatly benefit you in the future.
-- Failing in your twenties is part of growth. Embrace failure and learn from it.
-- Focus on collecting experiences, such as concerts, festivals, road trips, or spontaneous adventures, rather than material goods. For memories, don’t collect shot glasses, you’ll regret it later.
-- Learn to enjoy your own company, reflect on your goals, and become comfortable with solitude.
-- Work on understanding your emotions, how to manage them, and how to empathize with others.
-- Expand your mind with literature, self-development books, and works that challenge your worldview.
-- Spend an extended period in another part of the world which can give you an appreciation for different cultures and provide life altering experiences.
-- Learn how to prepare your own meals- a valuable life skill which can help you live healthier.
-- Understand the importance of looking after your mental, physical, and emotional well-being.
—Spend time thinking about where you want to go in life, and set both short-term and long-term goals.
Learn about retirement plans. Compound interest is a young person's best friend. Compound interest makes rich old people.
Take care of your body and keep it healthy. You have plenty of time to acquire habits helping that and slowly get rid of those damaging it - use that time before the issue is forced on you.
I tell people to keep an eye on their diet. Once you hit your early 20s that whole teen "I can eat a whole pizza and be fine" is gone. It is incredibly easy to go over your calorie needs in a week and after a year you've gained 2-3 lbs or more. Before you know it by 30 or 40 you are 50+ lbs over and obese and now you are struggling to lose it. It creeps up on you.
Roth IRA
Don't have kids.
Grow some plants. Whether it's a small succulent or a big lemon tree; it'll definetly make your life more enjoyable watching them grow.
Get away from tech on a regular basis. Allow yourself to be in your own thoughts occasionally. I think constantly being tied to phones and the internet is killing creativity because we never have those day dreaming moments that lead to inspiration.
Don't spend huge chunks of your life on video games. They are a fun distraction but at the end of the day is it just bits on some server that could be shut down at any moment. Get off of the dopamine treadmill.
“So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide. Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none. When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision. When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.”
- Tecumseh
Learn how to learn. Having the ability to look up things on the internet, watch YouTube videos, go to the library and find books, ask people for help and even show you how to do something. Most people are willing to teach others if you're willing to learn.
I wouldn't necessarily recommend it unless you feel comfortable with it but sometimes money is tight and it's easier just to replace that 10$ part rather than call a repair guy. I've looked up how to replace a part on a water heater on the internet because it was cheap at Lowes and I didn't want to pay weekends rates for the plumber.
Also learn how to do basic things like learn how to change the oil on your car, replace your belts and change a tire. You'll save some money and feel good about being able to do these little things. Look for tools at yard sales and pawn shops if you don't have a lot to spend on tools.
Save at least $30,000 for retirement within ten years of your first adult job.
If you can, put 15% of your check into your retirement every single check, at minimum.
That will set you up for retirement, especially if you're entering the work force in your late teens or early twenties.
Goals.
You're not going anywhere unless you DECIDE to go there.
Forget "how do I know if its the right goal"?
You're can modify and change your goals as you go. Kind of like practice?
Just do it. Start small. Review regularly. Act on the steps that reach your goal.
Travel, live abroad if possible, and experience living in a big, culture-rich city. Unfortunately the economic realities of the 2020s are making this increasingly out of reach for many youth, but if you have the resources and opportunity, absolutely go for it. As you get older, responsibilities and lack of energy will likely sap much of your ability/desire to move around as much (this isn't true for everyone, but it's extremely common). Even if traditional travel is impractical for you, there still exists cheaper opportunities for exploration that are a bit off the beaten path, such as the WWOOF program.
Regardless of your situation/location, one thing that basically anyone can do is get involved in a cause. Find something you're passionate about and throw yourself into it. Make sure it's something that you can do in-person and not virtually... as in, there are local groups you can join for this cause, although if there aren't you can always try making one or forming a local chapter of a larger org. With the right networking you'd be surprised how many other people will join you, especially for causes that involve your local community. This is a great way to meet other people, get to know the issues facing your neighborhood/city better, and learn to navigate your local government/NGOs. Again, as you get older responsibilities/exhaustion can make this sort of thing a lot harder.
Have sex with as many different attractive people as you can, using protection. You'll understand when you're older, feel older, and look older. It's a window that doesn't stay open.
Psychedelics.
Get out of your comfort zone.
Kill your sacred cow.
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