This image is very gender affirming because I wouldn't eat any of this
this post was submitted on 05 Dec 2024
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Slop.
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For posting all the anonymous reactionary bullshit that you can't post anywhere else.
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so me fr
I make my bf "guy chow" all the time just cos I know it's his favourite but if he showed me this in any amount of seriousness I can promise you he'd be making himself "guyslop" going forwards.
The cheek of turning your nose up at a meal made for you by your partner is peak melt behaviour.
I've pretended to enjoy some really bad food before from friends or partners. Friends most often who are just trying to be nice but I'm a cook professionally and can usually give constructive criticism without hurting feelings too bad cause i'll also absolutely teach techniques. I don't try to fundamentally alter the meal, just tips and tricks for maximizing it. Usually in any group of more than me and there's cooking going on, I just handle it myself. I'm really really good and will be running circles around any non professional to the prep and cook timing will be thrown off and also if i make a meal for people i like i wanna be responsible for every single detail out of pride. Generally people are happy to learn neat food things that make their lives easier going forward. I'd never do so in a big group setting or anything so inappropriate, the being a pro and generally having cooked for the other person several times first i do enter the discussion as someone who does know what they're talking about.
Tips are always welcome, just not ungratefulness or shitty memes.
A house I used to live in gained a recurring joke of threatening to go to someone's parents house and cooking their dad a really mediocre spaghetti.
i know it's just goofing around but gendering everything even just as a heehee hoo is tiresome to me
Lasagne non skill intense? How. A proper lasagne requires the cook to make a great bolognese ragu as the main flavour that takes hours to cook, homemade pasta dough kneaded well and rolled to the correct thicknesses, a perfect béchamel sauce that doesn't split, and cheese of course. This is all hard to do for most home cooks. Making a lasagne from scratch can legitimately take up half a day.
homemade pasta dough
Who the fuck is doing this
(Also most lasagna made by americans is basically just jarred spaghetti bolognase with wide noodles)
No one makes their own noodles, but lemme tell ya, it makes SUCH a difference, we make our own noodles at work and that was my first time trying fresh noodles and holy fucking hell it changes the game in ways you cant even imagine. The starch holds sauce and flavour and it just makes every part of it 30% better.
it's kinda true across the board with alot of dishes. sandwiches with homemade bread, dal with homemade naan, tacos with homemade tortillas, pie with homemade crust.
it's surreal how much making the simplest component (flour, water, salt, yeast) from scratch elevates the dish far beyond what seems possible.
I think we delude ourselves about how shelf stable flour and baked goods are, simply because they won't make you puke or diarrhea. we lose a lot of quality, satisfaction and probably nutrition for not much convenience.
I do, because I'm a sucker for self inflicted punishment lol. Not often because it's too much effort. Also it has a completely different texture to store bought pasta sheets. And you can incorporate ingredients like spinach into the dough to give it a different colour and taste. Some green spinach pasta sheets in a lasagne adds a nice colour when you slice through it and see all the layers.
You're doing Effort Lasagne, low effort is canned sauce and boxed noodles (folks, i strongly recommend getting a noodle press thingy, fresh noodles are soooooooo good. You have no idea how much better your pasta can be until you've tried it.).
I feel like I've made lasagne that was fine and somehow way less effort than this
Yeah of course you can make a good lasagne without having to do make everything from scratch yourself, but there's nothing like a classical homemade lasagne. It's probably my favourite food. I don't make it often because of all the effort though. More often I'll just have the bolognese ragu with some homemade pappardelle pasta, it's much less effort.
I'd probably assume the slop version of lasagne is low effort versions.
Other than lasagne, I don't eat pasta. Idk if I have a favourite food atm
The lasagna slop is like a Stouffer’s frozen lasagna, I assume
I really don't care about bechamel, nothing ever has been made better thanks to a bechamel.
It's the empty air of sauces
It's important for the lasagne though, you're supposed to add fresh nutmeg which gives it some flavour, and then you can either mix in some cheese with the béchamel, or put the cheese on top when layering it, so it combines.
I just add the nutmeg when layering instead of doing a bechamel.
I'm more of a ricotta guy, but big ups to a good bechemel lasagna. My partner could eat ricotta straight, and since I can live without lasagna, I tailor it for him.
By itself yes, but it brings out flavour in other things.
Yeah you try to manipulate freshly boiled lasagna noodles without burning yourself, ripping the noodles, and getting them to lay properly in the dish and then tell me there’s no skill involved
For that matter, baked ziti, lasagna, and antipasto are all labeled as girl food. Whoever wrote this seems to think Italy is nothing but women and femboys.
You don't need to boil lasagna noodles before putting them in the baking dish. Regular lasagna noodles, they don't need to be the weird already soft ones. People overcomplicate lasagna. You can literally just dump a bunch of ingredients in a baking dish and it's gonna be good. Sure it's not gonna be the most gourmet lasagna you've ever tasted, but who cares? I don't. I prioritize ease and time saving when home cooking. I would boil myself and then climb in the oven before I would ever waste my time parboiling pasta.
If you're making your own lasagne sheets from homemade pasta dough, you've got to blanch them at least, otherwise it's just going to be a chewy mess.
fair enough but I would also boil myself and then climb in the oven before I made fresh pasta from scratch
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Is 
sexist? New struggle session just dropped.
What but why is anyone handling hot noodles. Just shock them with cold water.
And wash the starch off? That’s what gets the sauce to cling to the noodles.
There isn't much surface starch on the surface of boiled noodles. You've gotta use pasta water! And that won't be enough if you're using typical storebought pasta, which has no coating of flour. You've gotta add a little flour at the beginning if you want to have a starchy water. Or use fresh homemade pasta.
Source: you'll never catch me with an imperfect aglio e olio emulsification.
My job for the last 3 years has been making italian food, and now i know a lot about noodle theory and you are completely correct.
Looking at this I mostly make wifeslop apparently. And then a lot of other food that isn't on here. What does other food qualify as? What about baking? Guess I'm a wife now? This is not clear I need more lore.
it says wifeslop can be made by husbands, btw
Baking isn't slop at all
It can be. I've got a a few really quick cookie recipes for the random times i want something sweet late at night. I can blast together some vegan shortbread cookies in like 20 minutes.
yeah fair, I've done those shitty 2 ingredient peanut butter cookies before and those could certainly be called slop
CW warning for misogyny or this will be taken down <3 the word "foid" specificly
You call that guy slop? Pfft.
On my days off from the restaurant and I'm truly not in the mood to touch a stove, I've been known to open a packet of instant noodles, season it while in the bag, pinch it shut and shake it, then just eat seasoned dry noodles. Pair with 50-500mL vodka, 3-5 olives and the cheapest cigarettes you can find (9/10 it's Double Happiness/双喜).
anglo food is slop, got it
Anglos, known for lasagna and chili con carne.
It gives me hope that I haven't seen any of this incel language in months. Among my zoomer circle people don't even use it ironically anymore. Hopefully this removed subculture will die with the millennials (no offense to the rest of hexbear)
These are legit and meaningful categories but the names aren't good.
Yeah, I'm not going to read further in this thread because I'm afraid I'll see some disgusting bigotry (maybe there isn't any, I hope there isn't any), but I think you've summed up my response to this post entirely. I've "cooked"/eaten all 4 of these categories, there's something real here, but fucking hell, calling them by gendered names is fucked, they're not as clearly gendered as this post tries to paint them, and trying to make them into some sort of gender war gotcha is just gross and, I feel, not very helpful or illuminating.
It's mostly lasagna theory in the thread. But yeah, there is a good relatable meme here if the categories had better names
What an ingrate...
where is the communist slop in this image? (It's just beans)
Lasagna not skill intensive? Hell, that shit doesn’t even save time. Lasagna is a pain in the ass to put together. If you call my lasagna wifeslop, I’m going to backhand you.
cw for minced corise please
Done
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