on a teams call
Guys we can solve this if we all just nut it out
Lets all nut one out!
this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2026
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Happens the other way too. Used to work in IT with Australians and it was hard for them to stifle giggles whenever I was talking about routing packets or routers.
For them, "rooting" means fucking
The one that gets me is Americans using fanny, which means vagina.
In the US, fanny usually means butt, but only square soccer moms and teacher types would use the term. Fanny packs are a real thing though
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“Oh, you don’t wanna go to Bugarup,” said Remorse. “Nothing in Bugarup but a bunch of wowsers and pooftahs.” “’s okay, I like parrots,” mumbled Rincewind, who was just hoping that they would let him go so that he could hold on to the ground again. “Er…what’s Ecksian for going mad with terrified fatigue and collapsing in a boneless heap?” The men looked at one another. “Isn’t that ‘snagged as a wombat’s tonker’?” “No, no, no, that’s when you chuck a twister, isn’t it?” said Clancy. “What? Strewth, no. Chucking a twister’s when…when you…yeah, it’s when you…yeah, it’s when your nose…Hang on, that’s ‘bend a smartie’…” “Er—” said Rincewind, clutching his head. “What? ‘Bend a smartie’ is when your ears get blocked underwater.” Clancy looked uncertain, and then seemed to reach a decision. “Yeah, that’s right!” “Nah, that’s ‘gonging like a possum’s armpit,’ mate.” “Excuse me—” said Rincewind. “That ain’t right. ‘Gonging like a possum’s armpit’ is when you crack a crusty. When your ears are stuffed like a Mudjee’s kettle after a week of Fridays, that’s ‘stuck up like Morgan’s mule.’” “No, you’re referrin’ to ‘happier than Morgan’s mule in a choccy patch’—” “You mean ‘as fast as Morgan’s mule after it ate Ma’s crow pie.’” “How fast was that? Exactly?” said Rincewind. They all stared at him. “Faster’n a eel in a snake pit, mate!” said Clancy. “Don’t you understand plain language?”
Loved it when he invented Vegemite
Sand sailing ragatta, ya wot? I often find my self after reading good books picking up the slang a little, if I start saying "no worries" more often my wife will know I've been reading Terry Prachett
You can just make them up
“You can’t fling a dick in a pond without lunging a tugworm”
“Flock me a dozen cranberries and I’ll show you a real bandana”
“Eatin’s alright for the kanga, it’s the Joey’s that’ll cunt up your goomers”.
They’re all shit but you get me
I would truly believe each of these were cultural touchstones in Australia
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You can just make them up
Sure, but if your boss and/or HR finds out, you'll probably get in trouble for it unless your workplace is much cooler about that sort of thing than most 🤷🏻
It's true, though. Flinging a dick in a pond would entail some changes in the laws of physics, tugworm or no 😄
In New Zealand, a "dag" is someone who has a good sense of humour and is fun (unlike in Australia where it has cringy connotations)
Explaining to a Yank that calling someone a shitty piece of wool, stuck to a sheep's arse is a compliment takes some convincing
And then there's "cunt"...
I love the Aussie (and I presume Kiwi as well) use of the word “cunt.” Y’all have made it so fun 😄
Yeh its as adaptable as the English 'Fuck'.
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I happens as a Brit too. Recently I casually used the phrase "use your loaf" around some North Americans. I then had to explain that loaf = loaf of bread = head. They were like "why" and then I had to try to explain the concept of Cockney Rhyming Slang, and then there was a barrage of questions about the origin of Cockney Rhyming Slang and all the other examples. I don't know, I'm not even Cockney!
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"fuck me dead" wouldn't even get a reaction from me. I'm used to off the wall phrases, and as long as I can figure out contextually what is being said, I'll roll with it.
I had a friend from Aus, she was doing nanny work. The first time she went to a baseball game and the baseball song came to "let's root root root for the home team". Apparently, root means to fuck.
I always love American sports songs because they're always so incredibly basic "we want to win we want to win we want to win, remember that time 15 years ago that we did win, yeah".
I tried to start a British chant at an American baseball game once. Immediately got told off for swearing.
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"We didnt come here to fuck spiders"
speak for yourself
Imagine your main exposure to Australian lingo is from the kids show Bluey and at and some point mum goes "fuck me dead."
Not sure if it needs to be pointed out.. to "nut it out" doesn't mean what Americans think it means. It means to use your head to come up with a solution. The nut is your head.
I haven't fully accepted the American use of 'to nut' to mean 'to cum', I mean nut already means head and teste, in England to get nutted means to get headbutted
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Aussie friend: "Nut out."
Me: checks fly
This is why I eschew idioms at work.
"This is why I screw idiots at work"
-- Dave of the porn startup "Dumbest Whores of Silicon Valley"
Silicone Valley
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I've had strange looks when I say "crack the shits" or just "crack it". Take it for granted that everyone uses these terms.
And what would everyone be using these terms to describe?
Pooping? Being tough on crime? Solving a problem? Bullying delinquent children? Or maybe finishing a difficult piece of work.
The phrase "to crack the shits" means when someone gets pushed over the threshold to become angry. Like "I used all the milk and Dad cracked the shits". Or "None of the students in the class completed their homework so the teacher cracked the shits". Or "everyone's going to crack the shits if we don't get a pay raise this year".
Ah. So the same as "flipped their shit."
Yeah that's a good comparison.
Fuck me dead I was just trying to nut out.
I feel like I could be Aussie. Especially if I get to call people a cheeky cunt with no repercussions.
I spent years wondering why people were obsessed with going outside to play darts (not joking).
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