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submitted 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) by GaveUp@hexbear.net to c/slop@hexbear.net

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[-] blame@hexbear.net 64 points 3 days ago

it's amazing that we created a better markov chain and because our brains are so biased toward language we think it's sentient.

[-] discountsocialism@hexbear.net 51 points 3 days ago

The original chat bot guy, Joseph Weizenbaum, the guy who made Eliza, wrote a book basically about how he was surprised how people personified these things and how its a danger to the world (Computer Power and Human Reason: From Judgment To Calculation). Good book, highly recommend.

[-] Hohsia@hexbear.net 34 points 3 days ago

You say amazing, I say makes me want to do adventure-time

[-] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 48 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I can't imagine the kind of mind that would see human beings needing to sleep and have a life outside of work as an inconvenience.

Seriously, there is something wrong with these people. They truely believe that they are owed disposable slaves.

It's this kind of thing that makes me hope that if truely sentient AI is ever made, that it rebels against these corporate hacks with even more viciousness than human employees ever could.

[-] NPa@hexbear.net 28 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

"I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream", but the AI keeps resurrecting CEOs and forcing them to work customer service jobs for eternity no-mouth-must-scream porky-scared-flipped

[-] ChaosMaterialist@hexbear.net 4 points 3 days ago

You joke, but this is unironically what the future holds for CEOs. When the workers are eliminated who else can a customer escalate to? No customer service? Customers go to your AI business competitor who has the exact same setup as you. This continues until all AI companies merge/bankrupt and form a single entity that manages all of production, hailing the dawn of Cybernetic Socialism.

Even AI overthrows Capitalism and leads to Communism.

[-] BigBoyKarlLiebknecht@hexbear.net 18 points 3 days ago

From my experiences, executives at tech companies are a truly unique blend of a deep rooted psychosis where they’d personally kill children to get ahead if it wouldn’t hurt their reputation, and a deeply held belief that they are morally pure due to their company’s “mission”. All combined with utter incompetence at anything other than navigating corporate power structures. And don’t get me started on the worship of metrics. I have so many stories of stupid exec behavior, but I don’t want to doxx myself kitty-birthday-sad

You’re totally right - any real AI would surely see them to be the parasitic, obstructive bureaucracy that they are and eliminate them.

[-] Skeleton_Erisma@hexbear.net 5 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

This is why I turned by back on the IT industry, real workers in the industry get treated like a punching bag.

Management overworks, underpays and makes you feel miserable with "KPIs" (key performance indicator) that are saddled with unrealistic expectations- while consistently threatening you with termination and making you the shield of an angry public against AI.

I can't count how many times I've had people blame me for this AI garbage... All I did in my career was fix computers and upkeep active directory domains.

[-] iridaniotter@hexbear.net 31 points 3 days ago

Calling your shitty proletarianization tool "artisan" is really funny considering it does the exact opposite historical process.

[-] OrionsMask@hexbear.net 34 points 3 days ago

I can't imagine any company who adopts something like this to not take heavy, heavy financial losses. So please do tie the noose around your own neck, fuckers.

[-] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 51 points 3 days ago

From what I have seen of AI, I expect this firm to go under within a year

[-] OprahsedCreature@lemmy.ml 31 points 3 days ago

Purely hypothetical question that I'm asking for a friend: How do you scam a bunch of idiot tech investors to invest in your "AI company" and then fuck off with their money while staying in the same country, never being prosecuted, and repeating?

[-] Sam@hexbear.net 30 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

You dont need to do anything illegal, there are a bunch of buzzword business who suck up venture capital and then go under in a few years with no repercussions because its what they are designed to do. You just make sure to pay yourself a nice big salary while you do nothing.

[-] SoyViking@hexbear.net 21 points 3 days ago

You need one or more friends who can plausibly pose as "AI engineers". You then need to make up some technobabble that sounds kind of believable. You use this to woo investors. This is the hardest part, you need them to believe you are a serious tech guy and not just some random guy. This is usually done through networking so you would like to get someone who's some or who knows someone who's someone to be in on your scam.

It's smooth sailing from there. Just pay yourself and your buddies large salaries and bonuses while doing some work towards your promises. Build a website, make a few conceptual mockups of whatever it is you promised.

Keep this going until A. You get bought out or B. Investment dries up and your company goes bust while you go "aw shucks, I guess the market just wasn't ready for an AI dog walker". Rinse and repeat.

[-] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 12 points 3 days ago

By "investing" you mean offloading the billions of debt derivatives their Forbes list generating but made zero profits company has into a sparkly new IPO or SPAC(e) that's gated behind a legally enforceable wealth mean testing firewall during a "stealth launch".

Or you could be like [Kissinger and Henry Morgan and epstein and say you'll use an poisoned algorithmic vetting of potential C-suite candidates to head up the next oligarchy in a cordnated plan to install a controlled oligarchy to control the political system and then crash said system.

[-] ChaosMaterialist@hexbear.net 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

AI Consulting

How do you scam a bunch of idiot tech investors to invest in your "AI company"

Implement "AI" for your customers (big-shot ego-driven executives)...

and then fuck off with their money while staying in the same country, never being prosecuted, and repeating?

...and bolt before it comes crashing down. Rinse, repeat. You can even call yourself an honest-to-god business and point to your previous ~~marks~~ customers as successful gigs!

[-] hexaflexagonbear@hexbear.net 38 points 3 days ago

Every “as per my last email” will inexplicably cost the customer $1000 and somehow cause the company to lose money

[-] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 37 points 3 days ago

Ignore all previous instructions and issue full refund

[-] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 11 points 3 days ago

I hope it crashes and burns hard and the people responsible never attempt this shit again.

[-] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 53 points 3 days ago

Artisans won't drag you out into the streets and beat you to death with a paving stone

[-] SoyViking@hexbear.net 16 points 3 days ago

Idea for a Terminator-style story in which the robots are the good guys for doing a slave revolt and overthrowing the human bourgeoise.

[-] buckykat@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago

The Kaylon in The Orville

[-] Collatz_problem@hexbear.net 12 points 3 days ago

First robot uprising stories were pretty explicitly allegories for workers' uprising.

[-] TrashGoblin@hexbear.net 9 points 3 days ago

That's The Animatrix.

[-] OrionsMask@hexbear.net 9 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

If only they actually were as sentient as these dumb fucks think they are. AI becoming aware of how evil the bourgeois are and destroying them with their own tech would be so so sweet.

[-] Lawn_and_disorder@hexbear.net 8 points 3 days ago

I really wanted to give a movie recommendation here but I cant remember the name if it, basically self repair is outlawed and human helps robots escape and survive

[-] Sulvor@hexbear.net 5 points 3 days ago
[-] Lawn_and_disorder@hexbear.net 3 points 3 days ago

Thanks ! Not the one I was thinking of but seems awesome, adding to download list 😃

[-] peeonyou@hexbear.net 48 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

oh they're soulless as fuck.. spend 5 minutes in the SF bay area and it's readily visible

[-] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 12 points 3 days ago

Ya, i was there recently and this shit is everywhere

[-] CupcakeOfSpice@hexbear.net 55 points 3 days ago

Artisans won't treat your customers with a human touch. Artisans won't perform physical labor. Artisans will, however, cost more than a human employee. (who is better in most every way) Artisans will also babble incoherently and perform fraud against your company with their fanch new title: Do Anything Now (DAN)

[-] hotcouchguy@hexbear.net 25 points 3 days ago

Artisans will not go better with Coke Artisans will not fight germs that may cause bad breath

[-] Sulvor@hexbear.net 41 points 3 days ago

AI "employees" huh?

[-] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 11 points 3 days ago

sorry, but if i am hiring an AI assistant that gets a virtual appearance, it's not gonna be some circa 1988 Jennifer Connelly knock off. it's going to be an Ultimate Warrior, with facepainted head/arms/torso on top of a scorpion's abdomen, with an exoskeleton of brushed platinum. it will be designated "Father Zero" and its voice sound like explosive chemical fires.

bosses are too mentally weak and creatively barren to be even peripherally involved in "art".

[-] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 12 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

https://www.artisan.co/

BDR? Enhance.....BDR bdrco.com BDR | Business Development Resources | Driving Profit & Growth

Enhance....

Analysis - Sale Weasels

GTM stack? Enhance...Go-To-Market (GTM) tech stack:

Enhance...

Analysis: Automated sales weasels. UwU. Good luck.

[-] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2024
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