this post was submitted on 02 May 2025
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askchapo

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[–] queermunist@lemmy.ml 70 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

"You mean the guy from the Apprentice?"

Or just act like you don't know who that is. "Sorry, I don't watch TV."

[–] 9to5@hexbear.net 27 points 1 month ago

Sorry I dont play Fortnite

[–] buh@hexbear.net 68 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] FALGSConaut@hexbear.net 26 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I constantly think about this guy's evangelical dad in Beijing

[–] Scranulum@lemm.ee 38 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

Look around suspiciously, then lean in and say "I don't believe he's human. I think they're here."

Edit: even better, lean in and say, "I think he's....Danish."

[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 28 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Edit: even better, lean in and say, "I think he's....Danish."

  • He enjoys a completely unjustified popularity
  • He thinks he is the centre of the word
  • He believes brown people are out to destroy civilisation if they get the chance
  • He enjoys eating shitty food

The facts checks out. Trump is Danish.

[–] elpaso@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago (3 children)

He enjoys eating shitty food

Seriously the food here sucks lol.

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[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago

Dane-ald Trump convincing Denmark to sell Greenland to Seppoland, only to immediately sell Seppoland to Denmark in turn, now THAT's what I call insider trading

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 34 points 1 month ago (2 children)

There's another American in Norway on this hellsite‽ Although I'm a second-generation immigrant rather than an "expat".

I don't think I've really "messed with" people when they ask those sorts of questions, not yet at least. I just say openly that I voted PSL, that a lot of people are disillusioned with the two-party system, and that I'm worried about my family and friends and all the other people trapped in this deteriorating situation.

[–] elpaso@hexbear.net 27 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Yeah I think there are about 18,000 Americans in Norway. A big chunk of that is Mormons. More Trump supporters than i thought too.

For me I can't really hide my American accent and I'm not fluent in Norwegian yet. It just gets really annoying because I don't want to talk about politics every five goddamn seconds. A Norwegian trump supporter tried to Amerisplain me last night and I about lost it.

Love the idea of pretending that I don't know who he is.

[–] ElChapoDeChapo@hexbear.net 32 points 1 month ago (2 children)

big chunk of that is Mormons. More Trump supporters than i thought too.

Mormonism is the only religion I'm straight up bigoted against and everything new I learn about them just reinforces my prejudice

[–] Parzivus@hexbear.net 28 points 1 month ago

It's Christianity with an American settler spin on it, deeply evil concept

[–] CommunistCuddlefish@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago

Yeah I tried not to be bigoted against Mormonism but every Mormon author I've read writes really simplistically, has weird attitudes toward sex.

And (spoilering disturbing content)

spoilerWtf is going on with Mormons and pedofilia?!

Stephanie Meyer: Twilight has a lot of it.

Orson Scott Card: wrote a book (Hart's Hope) that opens with a graphic depiction of it, justifies it, and the next chapter goes into how "wicked" the child victim is

So yeah now I'm biased against Mormons

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

The word trump, incidentally, is defined by NAOB as

  1. {DIALEKTALT|DIALECTAL} {tung,|heavy,} {svær|enormous} {kar|fellow}
  2. {MUNTLIG|SPOKEN} {tverr,|contrarian,} {vrang|difficult} {mann|man} {eller|or} {gutt;|boy;} {vriompeis|fogey}
  3. {DIALEKTALT|DIALECTAL} {børsekolbe;|butt of a rifle;} {geværkolbe|gunstock}

Of course, this word is not pronounced like Norwegians pronounce the name Trump ("Trømp"), but it is still a little funny.

For me I can't really hide my American accent and I'm not fluent in Norwegian yet.

A strat I've seen a lot of people use in that situation is to just pretend they're Canadian, but I couldn't do that, frankly. I guess I just don't like making that part of myself invisible.

It just gets really annoying because I don't want to talk about politics every five goddamn seconds.

Absolutely, absolutely. I think I might have a higher tolerance for talking politics than most people, but Norwegians' fondness of hounding Yankees with political question after political question is one of the things that led me to develop my own current theories about the interplay of Europe and Seppoland. Like the reason why Americans in Norway get these questions is ultimately because Norwegians can on a deep level sense that their country is entirely beholden to the whims of another country whose policies they have no say in, but without any actual theory to make sense of this situation, this sort of deep-seated insecurity about the New Master's actions basically turns into an obsession with Seppoland's politics — and in turn Americans in Norway are turned into "fetishes" of the current vassal relationship, if that makes sense.

Seppoland, naturally, benefits from this arrangement: if anyone who tries to resign from settlerism is soon met with crowds of people who act Deeply Weirdly about the ex-settler's background, leading the ex-settler to feel frustrated and alienated, like they just can't fit in and can't carve out a life outside of the settler-colonial paradigm, then resigning from settlerism is made all the more difficult. This "McAfeeization" of settlerism becomes especially important during crises of the colonial system, where settlers' loyalty to the project cannot be so readily bought with "treats".

This is at least my current understanding.

A Norwegian trump supporter tried to Amerisplain me last night and I about lost it.

Jesus Christ, tell me about it. Young men are turning increasingly rightward, so there's a lot more Norwegian Redcaps than there used to be, and they are painful. Just completely disconnected from reality and their own interests. They lick boots that even liberals wouldn't lick, and Norwegian liberals fucking love to lick boots, so that's saying something.

[–] elpaso@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

A strat I've seen a lot of people use in that situation is to just pretend they're Canadian, but I couldn't do that, frankly. I guess I just don't like making that part of myself invisible.

I can pass fortunately. I know enough Canadians and can emulate the accent. I have traveled up there a lot as well.

and in turn Americans in Norway are turned into "fetishes" of the current vassal relationship, if that makes sense.

That explains so much.

Young men are turning increasingly rightward, so there's a lot more Norwegian Redcaps than there used to be, and they are painful.

I worry about that, I saw it happen in the US. The brainrot with US algorithms and social media is out of control.

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I can pass fortunately. I know enough Canadians and can emulate the accent.

Honestly, I wouldn't expect most Norwegians to be so fine-tuned to the differences between American and Canadian accents, nor so acutely aware of the popular culture and current issues of Canada, for that much effort to need to be put into passing as Canadian.

The brainrot with US algorithms and social media is out of control.

This is why I've been trying to push people to join the fediverse, especially locally-owned servers. The way things stand, if Norway is so reliant on Seppo tech with Seppo algorithms, all the culture war brainrot nonsense ends up much more easily imported.

— Apropos "brainrot," I translated an article the other day about how "hip youngsters" watch A Minecraft Movie in English for the memes, while families taking their kids watch the Norwegian dub. This country has totally fucked language politics.

[–] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Oh good god, the whole point of wanting to emigrate is THEY’RE the people I’m trying to get away from.

[–] elpaso@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

Usually the trump supporters are Americans here. There isn't a lot but if they are a white dude then yeah...

Last night was the first Norwegian one. Probably early 20's.

[–] Sinisterium@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago

Mormons actually have high percentage ancestry from Denmark, because they went there to proselytise. I guess its a traditions thing.

[–] HalfSection@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

There's another American in Norway on this hellsite‽

Makes three of us

[–] Spike@hexbear.net 30 points 1 month ago

"He is destroying America, which is a very good thing"

[–] Kumikommunism@hexbear.net 27 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I would just repeatedly assert that he's the same as any other president. Oh he's using America's hegemony to bully its "allies"? Unfortunate that that just started now. Oh he says overtly racist and ridiculous things? Must be the first one. His economic policies are hurting you now? Guess we're including the right countries finally.

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[–] EllenKelly@hexbear.net 24 points 1 month ago

You mean that guy from Home Alone 2?

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Pretend you have no idea who they're talking about

[–] Dessa@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"You mean the guy from 'the apprentice?' They went and made him president? Haha, can you imagine?"

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[–] mendiCAN@hexbear.net 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

tell em youre so glad they asked as youre an advance guard charged with gathering Intel on their countries value. start asking probing questions about the worth of various buildings, govt programs, whether they'd like to sell, whatever is nearby...etc... bust out a calculator and keep a straight face for as long as you can.

[–] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago

lol, yeah, tell them you work for some giant bank in the US and you're there to negotiate the handover of managerial control of their sovereign wealth fund to make it more efficient and maximize its profitability.

if they don't try to kill you immediately, they are part of the problem.

[–] QuillcrestFalconer@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago

Finally, a president brave enough to destroy Amerikkka

[–] CrawlMarks@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago

Show them his sizzle reel from his time as a professional wrestler

[–] micnd90@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

First say "jeg taler ikke englesk", then regardless of what they said back, say "jeg taler ikke Dansk"

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago (4 children)
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[–] grandepequeno@hexbear.net 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Pretend you don't know what they're talking about

[–] Le_Wokisme@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"donald trump? the pro wrestler?"

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[–] AernaLingus@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

Act surprised that they know about a Hearthstone streamer who was most popular in the mid-2010s

[–] WaterBowlSlime@lemmygrad.ml 11 points 1 month ago (3 children)

"Expat" lol

Did you renounce your citizenship or are you gonna file your US taxes every year for the rest of your life?

[–] triplenadir@lemmygrad.ml 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sign me up for the campaign to abolish the word "expat"

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Legit though, the only difference between expat and immigrant more often than not is just vibes, and the vibes are more often than not just us-foreign-policy

I'm willing to give people some leeway, but anyone who self-describes as an expat still immediately gets a raised eyebrow from me as probably having some chauvy brainworms

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[–] elpaso@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

Honestly? Will see. I'd love to get another citizenship.

[–] mendiCAN@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

can you actually renounce paying taxes? i thought i read the US was unique in that was very hard to, even if you renounce citizenship as you say

[–] WaterBowlSlime@lemmygrad.ml 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Iirc you can stop paying taxes but literally only if you give up your US citizenship entirely. But to do that, you have to book an in-person appointment with feds where you convince them to give you permission. And I'm pretty sure there are no laws or procedures they have to follow; it's just vibes-based whether or not they let you go.

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[–] daniyeg@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago

say you have compromising pictures of trump when you guys had passionate gay sex and you escaped from the US when he got elected so you don't get whacked

[–] Owl@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Pretend you think they're asking about turnips, and give your honest opinion on those delicious root vegetables.

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[–] VapeNoir@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

"I like the first album, but the later stuff is too commercial for me."

[–] Euergetes@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

pretending trump is still on the apprentice is a start but acting like a huge reality tv head--compare seasons, similar shows and hosts-- mfs will feel like they've stepped into a different decade

Say you support JDPON Don in his relentless war against the so called "workers" of Amerikkka

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