this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2026
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Chapotraphouse

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[–] WhyEssEff@hexbear.net 103 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

Ridiculous as all of this might seem, homeland security officials tell me that many if not most federal agents have taken all of the rhetoric about shadowy Antifa networks to heart.

chat is it good or bad when the Deep State realigns towards chasing Hyperborea

[–] Drithvan@hexbear.net 72 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

Well, since "Antifa" is a non-existent organization, it puts them on a wild goose chase.

On the other hand, it also gives them a justification to label any sort of leftist action "Antifa", thereby making it terrorist action.

EDIT: Just had a great thought: if people really wanted to waste the Fed/ICE's time, we should just leave anonymous reports of "Antifa safehouses" in the most obscure places. Send them on a hunt for something that doesn't exist, waste their time.

[–] LeninWeave@hexbear.net 48 points 1 month ago

I think WhyEssEff is joking about the third reich nazis doing the same thing.

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[–] SacredExcrement@hexbear.net 49 points 1 month ago

glances at pigs convulsing on the floor frothing at the mouth after being in the same room as a strip of fentanyl

[–] Riffraffintheroom@hexbear.net 66 points 1 month ago (2 children)

He looks like a nerd. They chose him so that chuds online could say “haha the leader of antifa is a skinny nerd”.

[–] tombruzzo@hexbear.net 71 points 1 month ago

The article says he's the leader of antifa because he lives next door to an ICE facility and let's other protesters come in to use his sink and shower. This makes his place an antifa stronghold apparently.

[–] invalidusernamelol@hexbear.net 47 points 1 month ago

I think it's more that the people in charge are just your psycho brain rotted Uncle and they see antifa everywhere. Especially since their directives from up top are to "uncover antifa".

Now if they want to detain you indefinitely, or fuck with you, they just say "antifa commander" and you're suddenly on 15 different watchlists.

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 65 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Who is this man? I'm Dr. Richard Dick Pennis and I'm the leader of Antifa.

[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 45 points 1 month ago (2 children)

i'm Dr. Willy Peter Johnson and i'm the CEO of antifa

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 37 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Dr. Willy Peter Johnson the urologist? My nemesis, the charlatan who stole my design for Penis 2?

[–] Johnny_Arson@hexbear.net 25 points 1 month ago (2 children)

If Penis is so good why isn't there a Penis 2?

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 28 points 1 month ago

It was going to change everything. Then Dr. Billiam Johnson stole my life's work and buried it. We wouldn't have war if we had Penis 2.

[–] Blakey@hexbear.net 19 points 1 month ago

Penis is so good we don't NEED penis 2!

[–] Drithvan@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Impossible, Dr. Willy Peter Johnson was killed at the battle of Charlottesville, 2017.

[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago

no that was Billy Peter Johnson Esq.

[–] smokeppb@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Drithvan@hexbear.net 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] smokeppb@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

The true leader rat-salute-2

[–] Drithvan@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago

No wait... I thought Man was the leader of Antifa? Mods, get this fed.

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[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 52 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

“Chandler Patey was identified through open-source research as an active participant in the protests,” an IRS-NG entry about him says. “Online platforms indicate he is the leader of Antifa in Portland, OR,”

Ok so they're literally just IDing people based on whatever random fuckwit says online with an OSINT tag in their account name/bio.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 52 points 1 month ago (1 children)

“This is my very normal apartment, and it has been referred to by right wing social media grifters as the ‘Antifa safe house,’” Patey told The Oregonian. “But I just let people use my sink and use my bathroom.”

[–] Drithvan@hexbear.net 50 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Antifa is when you let people have a place to take care of business.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago

And they've been takin' care of business, antifa
Takin' care of business, antifa
They've been takin' care of business, it's okay
Takin' care of business and pooping overtime, work out
Whoo

[–] Dort_Owl@hexbear.net 49 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That doesn't look like my Aunt Tifa at all!

[–] Frogmanfromlake@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago

Your aunt is a baddie

[–] principalkohoutek@hexbear.net 48 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] JohnBrownsBawdy@hexbear.net 34 points 1 month ago

Bigus Antifus

[–] thelastaxolotl@hexbear.net 48 points 1 month ago

red-fist

I AM ANTIFA

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 41 points 1 month ago (2 children)

They found Antifas Georg, the man who killed a million billion fascists?

[–] Drithvan@hexbear.net 32 points 1 month ago

Antifas Georg, a man who has killed approximately 150 billion fascists, is an outlier and should be disqualified. He's also currently in hiding.

[–] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 37 points 1 month ago

fuck man this is gonna make the next shareholder meeting a pain in the ass

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 35 points 1 month ago
[–] gay_king_prince_charles@hexbear.net 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Crazy how we don't have an Adam Friedland emoji

[–] axont@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago

bug-facts This isn't Adam?

[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Drithvan@hexbear.net 25 points 1 month ago

Holy shit is that John Antifa

they found me rip

[–] RoabeArt@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago

That doesn't look like George Soros at all.

[–] Zuzak@hexbear.net 21 points 1 month ago

I didn't vote for him. How do you become leader then?

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago

[Looking at photo.] I can't make Onion jokes day after day. [Looking at photo again.] But...

[–] tombruzzo@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago

Guys, something has gone wrong. Langley said it would be my turn as head of antifa next

[–] rubber_chicken@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

Anyone know his thoughts on the afterlife?

[–] CrookedSerpent@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

#notmypresident

[–] Masterkraft0r@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 1 month ago

ned ludd just dropped

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

they accidentally a letter s in his name

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