this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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Me, five hours into explaining what a film is, the existence of Hollywood, the existence of a country over the sea called 'America', the internet and what woke means: "ok so basically, in the year of our lord two thousand and fourteen there was this thing called 'Gamer Gate' and single men who couldn't have sex would harass women for criticising video games"

Medieval serf with like seven different intestinal parasites you-are-a-serf: "wtf is a pronoun?"

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[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 47 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The virgin six hour lecture on cultural context, the chad telling him "They stole her ass" and watching him immediately understand

humans from most time periods would understand the rage and despair that accompanies the theft of livestock

[–] RNAi@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Mate, me not so long ago wouldn't understand this shit either

[–] silent_water@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

I still don't tbh

[–] Smeagolicious@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (5 children)

idek what the fuck they're on about now. The game is probably gonna be shit and all but like, the protagonist just looks like she's got 1979 Alien Sigourney Weaver vibes, which is pretty aesthetically consistent with star wars, a series started in the late 70s.

And I am loathe to engage in this stupid ass (hehe) conversation on their level, but Ripley wasn't some hypersexualized inhumanly proportioned t&a waifu. Does that make foundational 70s-80s scifi woke trash because women weren't caked up anime waifus?

e: also aside, just looking at it now but damn i fw droids with coats/capes/cloaks, thats a good design

[–] HumanBehaviorByBjork@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

they STOLE her ASS. the game is about tracking down and punishing the nefarious butt thief gang of Skampo-8.

[–] Smeagolicious@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

Not the dreaded Skampo Booty Looters!

[–] Dolores@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

somehow i bet extremely sexed up foundational scifi like Barbarella would also get called woke

[–] silent_water@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

wtf are these people complaining about I literally want to be her

[–] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

I want to be the robot

[–] Dolores@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

i think a medieval peasant probably would be able to understand incels, lots of systems existed that could curtail a young person's available partners in small village life. this post makes me think it's plausible that it could be a familiar mentality for antique people

[–] tocopherol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I legitimately believe the average peasant was less ignorant and more cultured than the type who makes these videos. From what I've heard it wasn't uncommon for a peasant to travel by foot long distances at least a couple times in their life.

[–] Dolores@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

to be fair that trip would be to a grave of a saint where they thought that collecting rotting juices from the corpse could cure blindness.

what's amazing is the modern guy's ignorance in the face of being able to read and presumably having a secondary education.

[–] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago

Not me. I'm going on Pilgrimage for the hotties and then probably getting burned at the stake for heresy after the fact.

[–] IMF_DOOM@hexbear.net 15 points 1 year ago

gigachad-hd "Sorry, but the ogling WILL stop. Let him die."

[–] Feinsteins_Ghost@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago

More and more thankful daily that this den of iniquity is as close to terminally online as ill ever get.

Imagine actually intending to make these fucking videos. Jfc

[–] Grownbravy@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The word “cumbrained” comes to mind

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

What is "cumbrained" but "Cumberland" without the L

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Ġēa, on þæt Ġēar 1492 sē Sċipmann Christopher Columbus āfand þæt Land, þe on mīne Tīde ƿē nemnaþ America,— þār lifdon and ġīet libbaþ maniġ and maniġfeald Þēod, heora Nama þē biþ Scrælingas,— and Columbus sīne Menn and ōþre Menn blāces Hȳde of Lande þīnum drǣpon maniġne Scræling þe macodon Þrǣlas of him, and on Americas Land þā Menn blāces Hȳde ƿorhton ‎Cyneƿīsan sīne.— And þǣrof, on ānre Cyneƿīsan, California, on Ċeastre Hollyƿood, siþþan þæt Ġēar 1900, Menn ƿyrċaþ Lēasspell, þe ƿē magon sēon and ġehīeran of grēatum Ƿāgum Gaderunghealla ūrra and of Ġealdorfenestrum ealra Hūsa.— Ƿiþ þissum Fenestrum tō ƿē magon sprecan ƿiþ Menn feorre.— And Menn, þe feohtaþ ƿiþ Unrihtƿīsnesse Cyneƿīsena, on mīne Tīde ƿē nemnaþ "Ƿōc"; þā, þe þās Unrihtƿīsnesse lufiaþ, and Ƿīfmenn, Bædlingas, Scrælingas, and Hȳde deorce hatiaþ, ƿē nemnaþ "Ċēode";— and Ċēode ƿiþ Ġealdorfenestrum lēogaþ, þe Ƿōc ƿiþ Lēasspellum sprǣdeþ Ġelēafan hearmfullan.— Lā, þæt Sōþ biþ þæt Ċēode dōþ þæt hīe ƿrēġaþ ōþerra!

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I cannot assert how correct this is, I basically just used Wiktionary and Old English Wikipedia to find all the wordsYea, in the year 1492 the sailor Christopher Columbus discovered the land that in my tide we name America,— there lived and still live many a manifold nation, their name to thee is Scrælings,— and Columbus' men and other men of pale skin from thy country slayed many a Scræling or made thralls of them, and on America's land the men of pale skin wrought their own commonwealths.— And thereof, in one commonwealth, California, in the city Hollywood, since the year 1900, men have wrought fictional tales, that we can see and hear from the great walls of our gathering-halls and from magic-windows in all houses.— With these windows too we can speak with men from afar.— And men who fight against the injustices of the commonwealths in my tide we name "woke"; those who love these injustices, and hate women, badlings, scrælings, and dark skin, we name "chuds";— and chuds with magic-windows lie that woke with fictional tales spreadeth harmful beliefs.— Lo, the truth is that chuds do what they accuse of others!

[–] Lemmygradwontallowme@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Did your Scandinavian help ye in this endeavor?

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

Quite a bit, actually.

[–] ashinadash@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago

Extremely critical support to ridiculous chuds in helping with the downfall of Ubisoft I guess

[–] Flyberius@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That AI woman's right shoulder is about twice the width of her left.

[–] huf@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

i feel like a lot of them medieval peasants would understand the "harassing women" part, and might even join in even if they're not sure about the rest...

"Why did the retchede incelles not obey the will of their parents and go into the clergy?"

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I can never hear "Sweet Baby" without seeing Matt Walsh's beared diaper baby plushie. [Sweet Baby Gang] (cw Nazis queerphobia)

[–] EllenKelly@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

potatoes are just like apples that grow in the ground, next question 😎

[–] taiphlosion@lemmygrad.ml 3 points 1 year ago

I love AAVE cause "they stole her ass!" Sounds like someone sucker punched her in the face lmfao