askchapo

Change the world for the better but everyone knows I did it so I get free beers for life. x3

(Maybe also make it so I'm immune to gout and liver disease)

elon gives me all his property

zuck gives me all his property

bezos gives me all his property

genie doesn't get to say shit about what i do with it.

1. Everything on earth is now (or better, has always been) psychically connected

2. Make my brain stop being so awful to me ~~sometimes~~

3. Free Palestine (fine its gotta be selfish... give it to me so's i can do what i wants.)

I want $500

I want a signed picture of LeVar Burton

I want a 6 month supply of Bombay Sapphire

Firstly, let's define a pocket dimension: a pocket dimension represents a place where time flows at 1/1 trillionth of the time that it does on Earth, I do not age while inside, is activated by intention, has a mjolnir-like capacity to return to my person by intention, death in there would mean being ejected into the real world, and I can choose to be ejected into the real world via intention.

1. A pocket dimension in the form of an fire opal ring in which I get to live as a protagonist in a magical battle world. It is replete with narrative direction that is perfectly suited to me, compelling enemies, larger than life combat, incredibly high threshold for skill expression in magic, arcanologically infinite sustainability of resources, and space for creative solutions. It places me central to the conflict and progress such that I am capable of pushing the world forward by solving problems and interacting with people. It is light-hearted like Pokemon as opposed to grimdark like Warhammer.

2. A pocket dimension in the form of an ornate silver band in which I can activate a debug menu of real life. It has a UI, but can also be controlled like a lucid dream. I can play through contrived scenarios with people. I can pluck them from real life or create them myself. I can study with teachers and compete against peers of my choosing. I can choose slices of time and space from Earth's past to see what happened. My own avatar can be modified in size, shape, age, and engage in noclip. I can fly or teleport. The dimension has an automaton that can be summoned to help me think through what would be useful to interrogate about situations. It has a repository of save files for situations and knowledge that I choose to store. I do not want or need for material comfort in this dimension (addiction, hunger, thirst, bathroom, etc.).

3. Practical immortality - I only age or die if I choose to. My memories are retained even during manipulation of my form. I can choose to regenerate or ahem degrade my body to any age I have attained. Any injury or illness sustained that would render me incapable of using my brain would instantly teleport me to the nearest city center with phone and wifi, clothed, out of danger, sober, clean, maxed out on material comforts, at age 25 with my two pocket dimension rings on either index finger. If a finger has been lost, the ring will be on the next finger over. If the hand is lost, then it will be in my pocket and still capable of being evoked. If, for some reason, there is no city center with both wifi and phone network, it will prioritize wifi and then phone, and if neither are available, then I will be teleported to the most populated city center on Earth. I will be equipped with a phone with three emergency contacts that is capable of using the local network, the equivalent of $300 USD in 2025 in the local currency, 10gb of wifi data, a valid passport, and a translation app if necessary. If I feel I am in danger or imprisoned I can choose to unstuck myself with this same effect. If I am imperiled upon respawn it will take me to the geographically next closest city over in the same conditions. Any injury, illness, or mental illness sustained can be regenerated via intention.

I want my foreskin back because I want the feelings they cut out of me at birth without my permission.

I want gay marraige to be recognized in Indonesia so I can move there with my husband and fuck off of Amerikkka and live somewhere nice that doesn't have freezing cold and snow and not a conservative KKKristian shithole.

I want enough money to live realtively comfortably to fuck off, enjoy the world, and not have to answer to a clock or a boss and office drama bullshit.

Nice try. You're not stealin' MY wishes

1. Some type of super healing where my body knows what the optimal way to exist is and constantly adjusts to be there. (no chronic back pain, broken limbs set and heal, cancer gets gone, eye sight is best humanly possible etc.)
2. I always have the money needed for any given circumstance in my money holder. (I could invite all you weirdos out for burritos and have enough to pay, or just go and cry in a whiskey neat and have the ability to pay)
3. Beloved supreme dictator of the world. Pretty simple really

Ok now for some actual selfish wishes

Wish 1 Practical Immortality – No aging, no disease, no accidental deaths. I only die if I choose 2

Wish 2 (this ones for the Posadists) Full command over a high-tech Alien Invasion Fleet - Also has the implication that there are now 100% Aliens out there

Wish 3 Mindcontrol (All shall bow before their eternal empress) No but seriously with this I can make the world leaders who wont step down from my ayy lmaos bend the knee peacefully and avoid most of the large scale warfare . Time to start humanities golden Age I guess. I will be a merciful godess. I promise

Finish my degree

Some reasonable amlunt of.money $10M-$50M

A variety of fulfilling jobs that suit my skills and interests that i can pick between until i see fit to retire. All 24 hours a week fulltime of course

I wish I was a little bit taller
I wish I was a baller
I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat and a bat and a '64 Impala

Ability to drink and eat whatever I want with no negative health affects.

10 mil.

Increase my charisma by like 10 points so I can [redacted by VolCel police].

I'd wish to be happy (gommulism)

I'd wish for communism (it's the system which benefits me the most)

No climate change (it's in my best interest that the world does not continue to burn)

Immortality (because the world I wished for is the ideal paradise and would be better than whatever the fuck happens when you die.

I wish for communism, because most work feels like bullshit

I wish for a dictatorship of the proletariat, because I had being led by sociopaths.

I wish for a red army, because I hate that shitty people have so much power.

Climate change makes me sad. Fix it.

No communism makes me sad. Fix it.

I wish I had my hair back. Just so I have the option of having it instead of having to be bald. Because I wonder if I remember what it's like.

1. I wish that every species in the animal kingdom becomes immune to violence inflicted by humans.

2. I wish that humans can develop magical abilities that strengthen with their willingness to empathize with other living creatures.

3. I wish that everyone had the ability to learn the language of another person after a day of spending time with them.

My body cannot get damaged other than aging. Can do hella drugs without ruining my brain, and I will be cured of my chronic physical disabilities

No more insomnia, this is ruining my life for the past decade

A couple million USD

I'm a simple person, my physical and mental disabilities and need to work are like 99% of the problems in my life

Make me bulletproof

Give me legendary fighting skills

....put 3 in the pocket for later use

I would just go around beating up cops

I feel like this could've easily been the plot to Luke Cage if the writers weren't a bunch of fucking libs

1. End capitalism because I don't want to show up for work.

2. Create walkable cities because I hate driving.

3. Eradicate all diseases because I don't want to get Covid or the bird flu.

No longer physically disabled so i can do more things in life (im cool with keeping the autism), win one of those lotteries that gives you the money in increments so I can afford to leave any job whenever I want, and have my immigrant status being confirmed for obvious reasons

I'd probably wish for a good night's sleep, a productive work day, and something nice to eat.

I should not be given genie wishes under any circumstances.

1. To always be in the best possible state of health for the entirety of my life

2. To be able to manifest any form of media whose story and gameplay I desire turns out that way

3. Perfect galactic mind control (basically will be able to achieve the former two with the efforts of others instead while also being able to achieve anything else I want, such as awesome food, and also able to control alien life if it turns out it exists)

I do not desire to live forever; one lifespan is plenty.

Given that the others have already wishes for communism and all that good stuff I'm gunna go for some really small-target wishes

Wish I didn't have adult acne like wtf I'm one foot in the grave and I still get pimples

um, I'd like my stomach to not be messed up and that I could digest food properly

I wish that my phone could run two apps at once and not just crash one of them so I can listen to a podcast and play a game at the same time

Destruction of USA and world communism would make me personally happy. If that is not okay I would wish for passive income just enough so I don't need to worry about future while living in a good home of my standards, a boat because I miss the feeling of waves on a ship and more fulfilling job with less work hours

I wish to become invincible; to lose the need (but not ability) to sleep; and to never be ostracized.