Wheel me into the nursing home I guess.
this post was submitted on 12 Feb 2026
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Cracker American Vernacular English.
CAVE speech
This is the second time I've heard of Clavicular and I'm already tired of hearing about him
We need to ban internet speak for a while I think
The millennials had the right idea: if you did a meme IRL, you got laughed at as a loser.
I look away from my hexbear feed for less than 12 hours and I wake up and now it's covered in this shit what the hell
i wonder if the general stall out of western culture is driving the rapid "innovation" around developing new e-slang to say the same old shit in reaction to the same old shit happening.
like how much of western cultural output is just live transcribing from the hip surface reactions to whatever horn is honking right now... for The Record.
This is what makes me sad about youth slang. The words are different, but the meaning behind them are the same. They are not experiencing anything new that millennials haven't experienced before outside of streaming and school shooter drills I guess. And at the same time, there are plenty of things that zoomers no longer experience due to societal decline wrought by neoliberalism. Streaming didn't exist when I was a kid while zoomers were born after the heyday of arcades as third spaces. I don't think I exactly missed out.
I hate that I can understand this. Oh stewardess, I speak brainrot.
now i'm trying to imagine a 50th anniversary airplane reboot upcoming in 2030
I don't think it could possibly work because we don't have the cast of serious people. That actress was only cast because she was the wholesome mother on Leave it to Beaver, which today would be equivalent to a Hallmark Channel sitcom instead of primetime TV. It isn't subversive if nobody knows who she's subverting. Daniel Day-Lewis and Joaquin Phoenix are the only two actors I can think of who are only noted for serious deadpan performances in the way that made Leslie Nielsen and some of the other actors so good.
i don't know, it just needs to be someone out of touch with internet culture for it to subvert expectations.
anyway, the reboot is sure to be awful. ai-rplane, with an ai-generated leslie nielsen making a cameo in place of the inflatable autopilot.
They pulled it off with Naked Gun which was astonishing to me as a millenial/gen x cusp person.
Liam Neeson is a perfect replacement for Leslie Nelson which is very funny because of the similarity of theory names.
Baby gronk rizzed up livvy dunne. Is baby gronk the new drip king?
gaga googoo
I feel you could make a fantasy satire here but how
Breaking your clavicle really hurts
One time I had my clavicle sproing out of my shoulder socket and it felt weird
reading this makes my bones itch
None of us spoke cringe like this when we were younger I'm sure
DEEP MEMORY UNLOCKED
Little Flakes explaining Pokémon to my father and watching the light leave his eyes, then leave the room and start watching El Chavo forever teaching me that nobody likes the things that i like
Little Flakes explaining Pokémon to my father and watching the light leave his eyes
"What if we lived in a society where we sent 10 year-olds off into the forest to gamble on dog fighting? Can I borrow some money dad?"
Looking back, I think he knew it was something that would cost him money
But to be fair, my Pokémon card collection did help me to pay for college
So, I suppose the lesson should be that everyone should be nice to me
"1 4m t3h p3ngu1n 0f d00m!!!"
Bring this back tbh
It does harken back to those halcyon days when the Internet was an anarchic mess of animated gifs and the Gog and Magog of SEO and social media had yet to crest the horizon.
the Gog and Magog of SEO
I feel like Jacques Chirac now
holds up spork
Back wen T3h inturwebz wurr moar ep1c den llamas!1!1!1!1!one!
ebin
The cringe we spoke was shares a lineage with this shit and knowing what I know now I would have cut the edgelord shit out sooner than I did. It was a long time ago. We were operating on one layer of irony, maybe two if you were feeling especially daring. This shit is hothouse bred, irony poisoning crossed back on irony poisoning with a lineage that makes the Habsburgs look like an example of hybrid vigor.
I presume by ASU he means Arizona State University, which is and always has been its own flavor of cringe. Tempe needs to get shut down until we can figure out what the hell is going on there. Of course the guy who hits himself in the head with hammers and enjoys meth is from the east valley. This is just a type of guy there. Mesa is about 50% this type of guy, if you exclude the Mormons.
uwu
None of these words are in the Bible
What has society come to when we’re deriding the ability to be a silly little guy. I demand jester justice
We need to shut down twitch and Arizona State University until we figure out what's going on
Gaming has been a disaster for discourse. On so many levels.
Gaming made streaming a thing people watched for more than a how-to. Gaming is the origin of at least half the lingo here. Terminally online gamers came up with 50% of the rest.
Solution: Gamer gulag.
outlaw gaming streaming.
if you stream without speaking, don't show your face and don't have a chat, then you can apply for a temporary streaming permit at the people's ministry of electronic entertainment, 6th floor, open every other wednesday 7-7.15AM
Cadaver had his bonemaxxing levels spike when the foid moid near him said "opensesame"
😭
Really makes you think