No Stupid Questions

You are worrying about something that is literally guaranteed to happen. Don’t worry, you will die one day but, in the meantime you could concentrate on things you can effect and change.

At least for me I feel death is the ultimate release, I'm more afraid of living if I'm being honest. But that might just be my suicidal ideation speaking

It's normal to fear death, but constant worry is perhaps excessive. If we're talking about literally every day, that's too much.

In a mechanical sense, worry is a motivator for action. You should worry about death somewhat, because that means you avoid dying. Worrying beyond the point of practicality means your life is going to be less enjoyable.

If you can't leave it alone, like the thought is hounding you, it might be time to visit a mental health professional. Even if you're still functional, there's no reason to not improve your living experience where you can. Don't do that to yourself.

My problem is not death itself. It's the part that comes right before it.

To the extent that you have a choice in the matter, the reason not to fear it is because feeling that fear all the time is going to be a miserable existence that will likely drive you to an earlier grave. That said another way your question could be interpreted is, "why wouldn't death be considered scary?", which is that's your meaning, it is scary, it's probably quite literally the scariest thing given how strong survival instincts are and the role that fear plays in those instincts. The reason people are not generally always in paralysing fear is because that fear that in some situations keeps them alive, ceases to be useful for most of the rest of one's life and is actively detrimental to the very survival it's supposed to safeguard. However, the fact that most of us are not unduly preoccupied with a great of death is probably less to do with an active decision or rational choice and just a healthy instinct to steer our thoughts away from that cliff once thoughts drift too far that way and we experience unpleasant emotions. As far as we know, we're the only species on the planet that deals with the knowledge of our own mortality so the extent to which this affects your daily probably has some greater degree of conscious mental decisions so I guess that's what makes it possible for a person to get fixated on the issue and develop unhealthy patterns of thought around it, that might be what's going on for you, but the other side of that coin is that that means it's at least somewhat within your power to reach a comfortable medium point between acceptance of mortality and a healthy amount of attention and thought towards it.

The question is better phrased this way:

Is worrying about death useful?

Being aware of your own mortality is a gift. Try to take some time to enjoy it while it lasts.

Because when you are at that point at the end of your life, you're not going to be thinking "I wish I worried more about this when I was younger."

If it helps most of the time fear of death comes from being anxious about not being in control.

Why worry, it's going to happen one way or another, and once it does it won't be your problem anymore.

The first 14 billion or so years of not existing was pretty great, I'm sure the next 14 trillion will be too.

It's literally the last thing you should be worried about.

I have a rather intimate relationship with death. I did a lot of end of life care, so facing mortality happened early in my life, before I was even old enough to vote.

I don't fear death because it isn't scary. Dying can be scary, as in all the bullshit that takes you from healthy and alive to not. If it's sudden and fast, you won't know it's there. If it's slow, well, death becomes a visitor you long to see.

No matter what you do, you will die. That can bring peace. Accept the fact of it. Know that, some day, everything comes to its natural end. It's certain, reliable, the one true constant we can count on. No matter what else the universe throws at our tailless monkey asses, death awaits with its open arms to embrace us all. I call that comfort.

death is not being alive. that was your state before your birth. you experienced it already for a timespan far larger than your life.

It will make you worse at living.

Fear is an evolved response to keep you safe so you can do fun things like have sex and eat bread and play with your children. If it's not keeping you safe, then it's being useless and you shouldn't feel it.

Because once it happens, that’s it. You won’t care anymore because you won’t be anymore.

I forgot where I heard this line:
"Worrying is like a rocking chair. It'll give you something to do, but it won't get you anywhere."

Another way to look at things is asking:
Can I do something about it?

If the answer is No, then there's no reason to worry. You can't do anything about it anyway.

If the answer is Yes, then stop worrying and go do something about it.

Worrying about it won't prevent it from happening, it's just going to make you feel bummed out about something you can't change.

Focus on enjoying your life, so that in your final moments your last thoughts are "Bummer, ah well, I had a good run".

What's to worry about though? Remember before you were born? It's going to be exactly like that.

I mean, I don't want to die, but I also don't understand what there is to be anxious about.

I am worried about it. But there's nothing I can do, really. It's scary. That's ok. People telling you to not be concerned with death or that they are glad they will return to the earth or some bullshit can continue to eat their false hope. I'm not interested.

It's a valid fear and worry.

Everyone should fear death. It's what keeps us doing smart things like looking both ways before crossing the street or not drinking random containers of suspicious liquid. It's healthy to fear death to a degree.

The question is that is this impacting your life in a significantly negative way? Is it causing daily intense distress? Is it causing you to become a shut in and not leave your home? Then it's worth addressing.

If it's not significantly negatively impacting your quality of life, then there's nothing that needs to be changed about your viewpoint.

I started fearing death more than ever a few months ago. I chose to do maybe what the opposite of what my fear told me and I learned to ride a motorcycle. So I'm still out here living life.

People have a lot of good points here, but I want to add that it's ok and normal to be afraid of death, even if it isn't rational. We're animals, that's just how we are built to feel about it. You can come to terms with it and obsess less, but it's likely going to be there anyway, which isn't always a bad thing.

Most things I worry about never happen. Worrying works.

Because it's going to happen no matter what. Save your energy for somehing else.

Reasons to not worry about death specifically because you worry about death:

1. Every moment you spend worrying about death is a moment you aren’t spending truly alive. If you’re worried about running out of time, then why would you want to keep wasting time worrying?
2. Stress—like that from constant worry—quite literally kills you both physically and psychologically. The more stressed you are the more wear and tear both your body and brain experience. So not only is worry wasting your life, it is also shortening it; in other words, worrying about death is actually bringing you closer to it.

Trust me, you don’t want to spent the one life you have worrying.

You can’t control it. That’s the answer.

You should worry about the decisions you make every day that might hasten your death (or make it really horrible), but that’s where your influence ends.

A lot of it comes down to what you believe happens after you die. Personally, I believe we just stop existing, that nothing comes afterwards. I believe that when I die, it'll be like going to sleep, I just won't dream, and won't wake up.

Going to sleep is, generally speaking, a very peaceful and pleasant experience. When I die, nothing going on in the world will matter anymore. All of my problems and worries will just instantly go away. Nothing I think matters actually will.

Personally, I find the prospect of there being nothing after death to be immensely comforting. I don't fear it at all.

You can't prevent it happening and ounce it happens you aren't able to care.

You didn't think about death before you were born and you sure as shit won't be thinking about it after you die. I'm not saying to ignore it, you need to be aware of and plan accordingly, but unnecessarily stressing or obsessing over it won't do you any good.

No. I think you should worry about death. Death sucks. I’m so tired of cultures that work to minimize this fact and inure us to the consequences of our actions.

Why does it matter?

You can’t stop it, and in almost any moment you’re not imminently dying. Is very easy to not think about.

So, why are you thinking about it? Why does it matter to you?

Only you can answer that and through engaging with that can you move forward on not being afraid of it.

wasnt afraid pre-life

Try focusing on life in general tbh. At age 80/90 (hopefully!) You'll likely be so done with life its easy to accept its end. At least, thats what it seems like talking to the older folk in my life.

What parts worry you?

Existence is a fluke in the eternal ocean of time. None of us were here for at least one eternity. Now we are. Then we will be not again for at least one another eternity. Not being is more natural than being.

Too busy celebrating life to worry about it

Cuz it won't matter to you once you do.

Because you have silicone heaven to look forward to.

I don't think anyone should try to convince you, fear it if that's your jam.