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The UK is a parody country that has effectively managed to synthesise all the worst parts of feudalism and neoliberalism together

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[-] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 96 points 3 months ago

My Great Great Grandpapa, Viceroy Chauncington Money was the hardest of workers. He would stay up late into the night evaluating the workers of his cotton plantation at Fort Massacre. He inherited this ethic from his own ancestor, Lord Cockwater Money, the 1st Earl of Money. you see, it was his genius that allowed him to invent money.

As I explain in my forthcoming article, Clean My Jaguar With Your Tongue, You Lazy, Filthy Vagrants, we are all so very lucky to live in the world they helped create.

[-] Zrc@hexbear.net 86 points 3 months ago

imagine being so rich your family name literally contains the word 'money' and daring to write something like this

[-] Zrc@hexbear.net 56 points 3 months ago

yeah I'm sure you worked very hard for your position

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[-] CharlieTheOctopus@hexbear.net 73 points 3 months ago

One of their kids makes a living by misleading the public, and the other one is a magician brow

[-] DerRedMax@hexbear.net 30 points 3 months ago
[-] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 20 points 3 months ago

Did her parents doom her by naming her after the AC/DC song?

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[-] Rx_Hawk@hexbear.net 68 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coutts

Founded in 1692, it is the eighth oldest bank in the world. Today, Coutts forms part of NatWest Group's wealth management division.

Like other people have said, the absolute lack of self awareness and ghoulism to write something like this is dumbfounding.

Also,

[-] yoink@hexbear.net 40 points 3 months ago

how do you try to do a power pose and come off with literally negative presence

[-] Rx_Hawk@hexbear.net 32 points 3 months ago

By having never stood for anything nor worked for anything in your entire life.

[-] Grandpa_garbagio@hexbear.net 18 points 3 months ago

I wonder what they think work even is. Like I get the sense that they consider "work" literally just a mindset and has nothing at all to do with actually doing a job

[-] Mardoniush@hexbear.net 26 points 3 months ago

Many of them think that work means "making an effort at a task" and not "if you don't sell your labour you will die."

Sure, some of them labour for long hours when the mood takes them. But they'll never have to work if the mood doesn't take them.

Want to take the week off? Fine. Boss doesn't like it? Call Dad and have him explain to boss what will happen to his credit cards. Fired anyway? No problem, 6 months in the alps and then a similar gig at the next company.

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[-] take_five_seconds@hexbear.net 32 points 3 months ago

because you suck and write drivel like this nobody not even super rich dickheads can stand to be around you

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 55 points 3 months ago
[-] theposterformerlyknownasgood@hexbear.net 39 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

If it hadn't been for the rest of the images that third one would have like half of twitter going on about how great his fit is. I know that because he looks like he's not allowed near high schools after the incident.

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 36 points 3 months ago

He could totally be a batman villain called The Diddler.

[-] Dolores@hexbear.net 30 points 3 months ago
[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 42 points 3 months ago

The English pillaged the world to create this man. Generational inheritance should be illegal.

[-] space_comrade@hexbear.net 19 points 3 months ago

Funniest failson I've seen in the last few years, maybe even tops Hunter Biden.

[-] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 17 points 3 months ago
[-] WaterBowlSlime@lemmygrad.ml 23 points 3 months ago

It's Hindi and it says हौसला प्यार विश्वास (Courage Love Faith). Apparently this dude loves India

[-] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 17 points 3 months ago
[-] Mindfury@hexbear.net 13 points 3 months ago

he derives his magic from where his family discovered the ancient sorcery known as "flavour"

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[-] TraschcanOfIdeology@hexbear.net 49 points 3 months ago

magician

This is like the family from arrested development if they were even worse people.

[-] IMF_DOOM@hexbear.net 16 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Rosie seems cool though imo. The rest get the owned treatment

[-] Feinsteins_Ghost@hexbear.net 41 points 3 months ago

and another daughter, Rosie.

wonder what Rosie did to not get her last name mentioned like the other two

[-] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 31 points 3 months ago
[-] Feinsteins_Ghost@hexbear.net 31 points 3 months ago

Yeah, Rosie getting the red-headed stepchild treatment there.

[-] charlie@hexbear.net 29 points 3 months ago

I aspire to be rosie

[-] FALGSConaut@hexbear.net 16 points 3 months ago

maybe they're just self aware enough to realize "socialite" isn't a great label, but judging from the rest of the article maybe she's an embarrassment that has a real job

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[-] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 40 points 3 months ago

As a downwardly mobile individual, I stan the magician son.

[-] Magician@hexbear.net 24 points 3 months ago
[-] chickentendrils@hexbear.net 34 points 3 months ago

It is the only worse country than the US. In terms of how much agency the country has in organizing itself so poorly.

[-] PapaStevesy@midwest.social 19 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
[-] TeddyKila@hexbear.net 41 points 3 months ago

tory not for much longer

[-] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 33 points 3 months ago

Surely, surely, if you really wanted to write this sort of article, you could find someone who didn't come from inherited wealth. Like, you'd at least go looking, if you earnestly believed what you were writing

[-] BelieveRevolt@hexbear.net 13 points 3 months ago

I wouldn't be surprised if the Telegraph was entirely staffed by nepo failchildren.

[-] Tychoxii@hexbear.net 31 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

porky-happy My name is Charles Gold-Status, I worked hard my entire life.

[-] FnordPrefect@hexbear.net 28 points 3 months ago

lol, Keep up, Reality Matrix, the Count DeMonet gag has been done already

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[-] Mardoniush@hexbear.net 27 points 3 months ago

Just to point out that Coutts is where the Royal Family banks and a savings account requires a minimum balance of...a million pounds? More?...some obscene amount

[-] RNAi@hexbear.net 25 points 3 months ago

| Bill Deeds

[-] CliffordBigRedDog@hexbear.net 24 points 3 months ago

Honestly if i was a nepo baby i would just change my name like nick cage did

[-] UmbraVivi@hexbear.net 22 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

He married Lucy Rose Deedes, the daughter of Bill Deedes, whom he has since divorced.

Makes sense. If he hadn't divorced Bill after marrying Lucy, things could've gotten very awkward.

[-] combat_brandonism@hexbear.net 12 points 3 months ago

the banker Money-Counts marries the daughter of the banker Deeds, you can't make this shit up

[-] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 12 points 3 months ago

Bill

Money

Deeds

Just gotta marry into the Cash family and have a son named Rich.

"Hi I'm Lord Rich Cash-Money, gandson of Bill Deeds"

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[-] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 21 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

magician

Money-Coutts

Founded in 1692, it is the eighth oldest bank in the world. Today, Coutts forms part of NatWest Group’s wealth management division.

It's like 8-grade syndrome but XVII-century syndrome and for real.

[-] heartheartbreak@hexbear.net 19 points 3 months ago

Brrrrr crispy money counts

[-] take_five_seconds@hexbear.net 19 points 3 months ago

ok so this asshole can name himself Crisp Money but if i call myself Stack Cheddar i'm cringe? fuck off.

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[-] D61@hexbear.net 17 points 3 months ago

"no no no... Its pronounced, Count deMoanAY... MOANAY!"

"Yeah.. Count da Money"

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this post was submitted on 07 Apr 2024
241 points (100.0% liked)

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