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[-] iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works 203 points 1 month ago

Absolutely nothing, because I wouldn't want a stranger to talk to me in an elevator and I was raised to do unto others.

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[-] Fleur_@lemm.ee 131 points 1 month ago

Considering it's only 8 seconds this must be the fastest fucking elevator ever so I'm probably screaming

[-] Damage@feddit.it 60 points 1 month ago

The elevator is actually out of order, she likes hanging in there, but you leave as soon as you see it doesn't work

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[-] Mac@mander.xyz 110 points 1 month ago

I make brief eye contact, purse my lips to form a half-smile, and nod my head downward. Then i move to an open corner of the elevator, i pull my phone out, and i end my turn.

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[-] Rhaedas@fedia.io 92 points 1 month ago

Lady in red. It's a simulation, no experiment is going to show anything worthwhile.

"Look again."

looks

"Fuck, I wish you'd stop doing that, Morpheus."

[-] Emi@ani.social 54 points 1 month ago

Nothing and just awkwardly stare on the floor or wall, like with anyone else.

[-] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 48 points 1 month ago

Well, considering the only elevator I take is to a secure area, I'd ask to see your visitor's badge and inform you civilians aren't allowed here unescorted.

[-] Slovene@feddit.nl 13 points 1 month ago

She IS the escort.

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[-] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 47 points 1 month ago

Absolutely nothing because people who have elevator conversations are not worth talking to.

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[-] Fleur_@lemm.ee 45 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Second 1: introduce myself

Second 2: Andrew Tate pose

Second 3: obtain phone number

Second 4: go on date

Second 5: head home with them

Second 6: get touchy

Second 7: undress

Second 8: get off at my floor because I already came at second 1.

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[-] Anticorp@lemmy.world 37 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

That's because you have big jugs.

I mean, your boobs are huge!

I mean, I want to squeeze em!

Mamma!

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[-] psmgx@lemmy.world 31 points 1 month ago

Well, Pac-man was originally called Puck-man. They changed it because... Not because Pac-man looks like a hockey puck. "Paku Paku" means "flap your mouth", and they were worried that people would change, scratch out the P turn it into an F, like...

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[-] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 28 points 1 month ago

I wouldn't say anything because some women find elevator pickup attempts intimidating.

[-] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 1 month ago

Tbf women say they find just interacting with men at all intimidating, see: Bears. I just don't talk to anyone anymore tbh.

I'm gonna die alone with my cats, but at least I won't be called creepy for asking a woman out for coffee!

Use the apps

No, privacy nightmare.

[-] kilgore_trout@feddit.it 11 points 1 month ago

Don't trust what the loud voices say.

Many, if not most, women are normal humans like you, looking for interaction like you.

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[-] Zaphod@discuss.tchncs.de 25 points 1 month ago

Nothing because I'm taking the stairs

[-] callouscomic@lemm.ee 24 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

"I can be done in 7."

[-] hsdkfr734r@feddit.nl 24 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I don't understand. What's a uniform gravitational field and why does being inside one feels like standing in an accelerating elevator?

[-] GrabtharsHammer@lemmy.world 28 points 1 month ago

This is a joke about Einstein's form of the Equivalence Principle:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Equivalence_principle

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[-] woodenghost@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

It's just that normal gravity on earth feels exactly like being in an accelerating elevator in space. So you can't tell the difference from the inside. Like in the elevator you can ask them, whether you're still on earth or accelerating in space. Einstein used this thought experiment to develop the general theory of relativity.

Basically Einstein thinking about that weird feeling you get in your gut when an elevator starts upwards led to him concluding that mass bends spacetime making light from distant stars go in curves around the sun, which was confirmed during the next available solar eclipse.

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[-] Entertainmeonly@lemmy.blahaj.zone 23 points 1 month ago

Omg girl, you look amazing in that dress. I'm so jealous. Be safe girl and remember to cover your drink.

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[-] Frogmanfromlake@hexbear.net 22 points 1 month ago

Nothing. It’s eight seconds and both of us are probably going to be glancing at our phones anyway.

[-] Superfool@lemmy.world 21 points 1 month ago

Get in the lift.

Stare while ripping an absolutely rancid fart that strips the enamel off her teeth.

Sharpie my number across her tits and give her "double-guns" on the way out

[-] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 18 points 1 month ago

This is getting insane. I (somewhat at least) get those "you have 24hs with me" ones but what am i gonna do with you in 8 seconds. Id rather spend 24h with an egirl than 8 seconds with you lol.

[-] problematicPanther@lemmy.world 16 points 1 month ago

If a hotdog is a sandwich, is the ocean a soup?

[-] TheRealKuni@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

A hotdog is not a sandwich.

If you serve bacon, lettuce, and tomato on a plate, you do not call that a sandwich.

But if you serve a hotdog without a bun, you still call it a hotdog.

QED.

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[-] Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 16 points 1 month ago

I was expecting this to be a video where her tits bounce in an elevator. Thoroughly disappointed.

[-] Hikermick@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago

Going down?

[-] A7thStone@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

You don't have the proper PPE for the radiologically controlled area.

[-] Diddlydee@feddit.uk 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

How did you get into my private elevator? SECURITY!

[-] GhiLA@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 month ago

"Nice uhh, b-leather we're having, uh."

cry, drop my spaghetti and run out

[-] just_an_average_joe@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Realistically nothing. You gain very little by saying something than you lose not saying anything. The only time people are somewhat open to being talked to, is when they already recognise you a little...

[-] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago

The modern mind is in complete disarray. Knowledge has stretched itself to the point where neither the world nor our intelligence can find any foot-hold. It is a fact that we are suffering from nihilism.

[-] Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 10 points 1 month ago

Tip my fedora and say M'Lady

[-] Hestia@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

sorry, i have a girlfriend already.

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this post was submitted on 30 Oct 2024
575 points (95.7% liked)

Science Memes

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