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submitted 8 months ago by Dessa@hexbear.net to c/covid@hexbear.net

The billionaire who wants to live forever just admitted he has long covid. Specifically, covid wrecked his lungs.

If you haven’t come across him, Bryan Johnson is a 46-year-old tech bro who cashed out a few years ago and now spends all his time trying not to die.

He has been interviewed by most mainstream news outlets where he has documented his extreme and bizarre quest for immortality. From a story in The Guardian:

“He rises at 4.30am, eats all his meals before 11am, and goes to bed – alone – at 8.30pm, without exception. He ingests more than 100 supplement pills daily and bathes his body in LED light. Two of the three meals he eats every day are exactly the same: boiled broccoli, cauliflower, mushrooms and garlic, nuts and seeds. He takes 54 pills in the morning, and the rest in between skin treatments and red-light therapy. He doesn’t drink alcohol, and doesn’t go out in the evening. He experimented with injecting himself with blood plasma from his 18-year-old son Talmage.”

Lol, and indeed, lmao

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[-] Hello_Kitty_enjoyer@hexbear.net 64 points 8 months ago

Nobody else picked up on the important part?

Today, for whatever reason, he admitted a mild infection in November 2022 (months before those interviews) stripped him of 15% of his lung capacity.

This is a guy that tweets about every other health gain he says he is making. Most recently he has boasted he reduced his sperm age from 57 to 42.

So why did he admit this now and not earlier? Who knows. I asked him, but haven’t had a response.

He's a billionaire who has long-COVID himself, but still can't bring himself to admit it. Why? Simple. Recognizing long-COVID means opening the doors for a restructuring of society, which strips rich people of their unearned wealth.

[-] 420blazeit69@hexbear.net 44 points 8 months ago

I think it's far simlpler: the fact that one can easily get sick or hurt and render so much of an otherwise healthy life meaningless shows how ridiculous his whole project is.

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[-] WhoaSlowDownMaurice@hexbear.net 59 points 8 months ago

Two of the three meals he eats every day are exactly the same: boiled broccoli, cauliflower, mushrooms and garlic, nuts and seeds.

Bro why even live forever if that's what you gotta do

[-] Hotspur@lemmy.ml 21 points 8 months ago

Yes, this is it exactly. What the hell is the point?

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[-] kristina@hexbear.net 20 points 8 months ago

yeah even if it made me live an extra 20 years, not worth

[-] Great_Leader_Is_Dead@hexbear.net 12 points 8 months ago
[-] Rom@hexbear.net 31 points 8 months ago

and goes to bed – alone – at 8.30pm, without exception

Nope lol

[-] kristina@hexbear.net 22 points 8 months ago

He does have a son who is his "blood boy"

[-] Shinhoshi@lemmygrad.ml 15 points 8 months ago

That’s not too bad if you’re a morning person especially depending on sunrise/sunset times in your time zone. The eating all meals before 11:00 is the bigger nope IMHO

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[-] Beaver@hexbear.net 51 points 8 months ago

A complete focus on personal benefit vs helping to build a society that actually responds effectively to crisis that affect us all.

[-] SacredExcrement@hexbear.net 36 points 8 months ago

He's a techbro, it's more shocking he didn't just outright turn his kid into his own bloodbag forever

[-] Egon@hexbear.net 46 points 8 months ago

He gets up at 4.30 and goes to bed at 20.30? So he gets a regular 8 hours of sleep? What's the health benefit of getting up at 4.30? You're not getting up early, you're sleeping 8 hours. You just have the same bedtime as a child for some reason.
Not that it's wrong, but it seems like he does it for a health reason and I don't get it.

Also it sounds like all of his day is dedicated to doing stuff to not die? He sounds like a human version of those collectible dolls people leave in their box to preserve value.

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[-] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 43 points 8 months ago

This dude was posting about his morning wood and nightly erection quality on twitter recently, extremely weird behaviour.

man posted his dick girth in those graphs. Elon musk could never

[-] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 19 points 8 months ago

Just realised it means he sleeps with a digitised cock ring on his shaft, that connects to his phone through an app.

What the fuck

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[-] EmmaGoldman@hexbear.net 42 points 8 months ago

Over/Under on him getting a lung transplant from a healthy poor person?

[-] ProfessorAdonisCnut@hexbear.net 23 points 8 months ago

Too high to even bet on. The only real question is Palestinian or not

[-] Flyberius@hexbear.net 15 points 8 months ago

He's got a son for that.

[-] Flyberius@hexbear.net 38 points 8 months ago

This is the vampire freak who steals his sons blood. Fuck these literal ghouls

[-] Lemmygradwontallowme@hexbear.net 15 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

What... they're not beating down the thymus gland allegations that easily, aren't they?

[-] Mardoniush@hexbear.net 14 points 8 months ago

Hilariously it later turned out that you could get the same result just by running the blood through a haemodialysis machine.

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[-] tamagotchicowboy@hexbear.net 35 points 8 months ago

No kidding, and he's probably overdoing it on some of the vitamins. Why doesn't he eat a more varied diet, it'd be so much cheaper and simpler. Most 100+ year olds I knew got to enjoy salsa.

[-] Tunnelvision@hexbear.net 17 points 8 months ago

You know multiple people who are 100+? They gotta have some crazy stories I bet.

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[-] Egon@hexbear.net 14 points 8 months ago

Yeah my mom was big on health supplements for a few years until I sat her down and showed her the she got 1000-3000% of daily recommended intake of various vitamins and metals. She was having constant migraines.

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[-] Lemmygradwontallowme@hexbear.net 12 points 8 months ago

Yeah... wtf, why can't you enjoy life while doing this?

[-] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 13 points 8 months ago

Guy has got to have some kind of mental illness. I mean what's the point here, honestly? Looking back at a 120 years of increasingly esoteric health rituals on the worlds most rigid schedule?

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If he roasted that broccoli instead of boiling it I bet he'd only have to take 99 pills

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[-] milistanaccount09@hexbear.net 32 points 8 months ago
[-] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 31 points 8 months ago

Lol, makes my head hurt to think of how pointless so much of our "journalism" is.

[-] Flyberius@hexbear.net 13 points 8 months ago

I had so many friends at school who wanted to be journalists. I often wonder how many made it, and what garbage they are writing now, and what atrocities they are whitewashing.

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[-] eight@hexbear.net 31 points 8 months ago

hilarious that he's fucked, but that means the rest of us are even more fucked

[-] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 29 points 8 months ago

He experimented with injecting himself with blood plasma from his 18-year-old son Talmage.

Look, if you're going to do this sort of thing, why don't you have some fun? You're probably going to get shot by someone who thinks you're an Epstein-Clinton vampire anyway.

100 supplement pills daily

I take 9 and it seems like a lot o_O I had a friend taking around 50 a day for some Lyme's disease treatment and I joked that a substantial portion of her calories might come from medication filler.

[-] Hestia@hexbear.net 26 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

And goes to bed - alone - at 8.30 pm

I bet he fucking does.

volcel-kamala

[-] CascadeOfLight@hexbear.net 23 points 8 months ago

covid-cool Meanwhile in Cuba!

(CW: lib cope towards the end of the article)

[-] coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net 22 points 8 months ago
[-] take_five_seconds@hexbear.net 21 points 8 months ago
[-] barrbaric@hexbear.net 20 points 8 months ago
[-] StellarTabi@hexbear.net 18 points 8 months ago

Would have been a great irony if this techbro put so much effort into living forever, but also was an anti-masker, but I couldn't find any evidence of such.

[-] nick@midwest.social 18 points 8 months ago
[-] moonlake@hexbear.net 18 points 8 months ago

“He rises at 4.30am, eats all his meals before 11am, and goes to bed – alone – at 8.30pm, without exception. He ingests more than 100 supplement pills daily and bathes his body in LED light. Two of the three meals he eats every day are exactly the same: boiled broccoli, cauliflower, mushrooms and garlic, nuts and seeds. He takes 54 pills in the morning, and the rest in between skin treatments and red-light therapy. He doesn’t drink alcohol, and doesn’t go out in the evening. He experimented with injecting himself with blood plasma from his 18-year-old son Talmage.”

The Most Unfuckable Man

[-] axont@hexbear.net 17 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I wanted to live forever, but now I admit I have hollowing. Every morning I rise at my bonfire to bathe myself with brilliant incandescence and eat the same meal of estus and purple moss clump. I take 54 different types of purging stones in the morning between my pyromancy and miracles. I don't drink divine blessing and I don't go into Anor Londo in the evening. I've experimented with injecting myself with liquid humanity from a giant rat.

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[-] pumpchilienthusiast@hexbear.net 15 points 8 months ago

lol get wrecked wheezie

[-] moonlake@hexbear.net 15 points 8 months ago

his 18-year-old son Talmage

Naming my son after the druid from my DnD campaign

Not so immortal after all.

[-] Bloobish@hexbear.net 12 points 8 months ago
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this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2024
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